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  1. #1
    Porno Junky
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    Default What can I stick my dick in

    What can I stick my dick in, to replicate a pussy, any household items or food?
    Last edited by Stormtroopr400; 07-21-2013 at 07:16 PM.
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  2. #2
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    Blender, toaster, garbage disposal, your car's engine belt... er wait, that is not what you're looking for... that is what my ex wife felt like...
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  3. #3
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    Pringles can.
    Coat some dish towels or shop rags with vasaline or axle greese. Warm in the microwave to desired temp and stuff in the tube.
    Or try a watermelon or cantalope
    Dont Lie
    It's all about the Orgasm

    SweetSarah16 Is my babydoll

    I am NOT interested in bi/gay sex. Please respect my HETERO orientation. Thank you
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  4. #4
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    Why don't you stick your dick into the round hole of a vaccum attachment hose. Let it suck you off to completion. No fuss, no muss!
    Last edited by SeasonedHotDog; 07-21-2013 at 08:14 PM.
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  5. #5
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    Get a jar on Mayo ,or put some in a plastic baggie an put it under a couch seat an fuck away .
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  6. #6
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    When I was younger I used to lift up my mattress, put two pillows between it and my bed frame, find something velvety/rubbery to but between the pillows, (I used to have a really soft camping roll-matt) then I'd put some kinda lube in there, kneel down and fuck it, sometimes if they were giving out free condoms at school (yeah I was young okay! Haha) I'd put on of those on to make it feel softer. If you wanted more pressure you could push down on the mattress too just above your cock. If was the only fuckable think I could think of at home. Hope that helps, maybe a picture of you trying it?
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  7. #7
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    A small melon. Cut the tip off one end and clean out the seeds. Fill it with mayo and fuck it good.
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  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stormtroopr400 View Post
    What can I stick my dick in, to replicate a pussy, any household items or food?
    I had a guy tell me once that he lost his virginity to a ripe watermelon on his daddy's farm.
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  9. #9
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    I can tell you somethings that don't work........When I was 15 or so I dug a whole in the ground lined it with spanish moss & proceeded to Fuck Mother Earth. Needless to say I was very disappointed I couldn't get my arms arond her & all I got was a Dirty dick & a bad case of chiggers !! One other thing, I had a friend who lived on a farm. He told me about fucking some of the animals, but he told me to never ever fuck a pig. I asked why & he said " because they will SQUEAL on YOU " !!!!!!!!!!!!!
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  10. #10
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    Default hmm

    my arse
    Fun loving, and love fun
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  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kimiko View Post
    I had a guy tell me once that he lost his virginity to a ripe watermelon on his daddy's farm.
    I had a buddy who pledged a frat. One of the hazing rituals was for the senior brothers to set up a watermelon with several holes drilled into it. The pledges then had to gang bang this melon. The pledge that was the last to cum had to then eat the fruit.

    Phew...good thing frats are comprised of straight, all American guys with absolutely no latent homosexual tendencies.
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  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by leed's 13th child View Post
    I had a buddy who pledged a frat. One of the hazing rituals was for the senior brothers to set up a watermelon with several holes drilled into it. The pledges then had to gang bang this melon. The pledge that was the last to cum had to then eat the fruit.

    Phew...good thing frats are comprised of straight, all American guys with absolutely no latent homosexual tendencies.
    *laughing* Yeah, I hope there was someone majoring in psychology in the group.
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  13. #13
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    Maybe this isn't helpful, but a banana cored out, and wrapped with enough duct tape to make it stable does wonders for a lonely cock. Just sayin'...
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  14. #14
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    Well I personally only stick my dick in pussy, ads and mouths but didn't that one guy in American pie do a pie once?
    Keep it sexual
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  15. #15
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    Why not put it into a bear trap.....that should would work right nicely, don't you think?....
    There is nothing more beautiful than the nude female body.

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  16. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by SeasonedHotDog View Post
    Why don't you stick your dick into the round hole of a vaccum attachment hose. Let it suck you off to completion. No fuss, no muss!
    sounds like fun but my cock wont fit in the hose im to think for it
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  17. #17
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  18. #18
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    Use a long knife to cut a seven inch slit into an eight inch eye of round roast. Heat the roast to an internal temperature of 99 F. Fuck it.

    Let me know how well this works for you. I've never tried it.
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  19. #19
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    My ex once told me he shagged a jam jar.... told me that after i had the jam sandwich
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