CAW # 11 LINK for JackassTales

[JackassTales]

http://stories.xnxx.com/story/42121/...m-Stained_Beds

[Ukslut]

[ejls]

Holy freakin' hell, Jack! Okay, so I read the comments prior to reading the story, but that was a week ago. I just read this and total forgot it was Jeckyll/Hyde.

The writing was excellent, from the beginning descriptions to the end. The dialogue was in keeping with the era. It was raw and it was violent and it had me hold my breath at times. While I understand people's feelings regarding the torture he inflicted, it made perfect sense in the story.

Outstanding, sir - despite the name of your female victim. Really, really well-done.

[ejls]

bump

[Wee Hector]

bump

[Twistedsister]

Pound

[wantsomefun]

Quite the departure for you!

Even though I had heard a bit about your story before reading it, I wasn't really prepared.

Damn.

"I have daughters."

Excellently done. Definitely not a feel-good story (I hope!) but a fascinating take on the Jeckyll/Hyde theme.

[darthel0101]

Definitely well written but there is one problem.
This was not a story but a chapter, the tale is left with too much unresolved.

This writing is definite competition in the CAW contest but with the competition so tight in my eyes, that one lack could be the deciding factor - I need to re-read the judging guidelines.

[ejls]

[Daddycums]

Pretty dark, JT. Definitely not what I expect from you. In fact, if I didn't know you wrote it, I would probably put you at the bottom of my list of guesses about the author.

I'll admit I didn't really like it, but only because I don't like violent stories. The writing style itself was excellent, and I think you did a masterful job of describing the dual identities of the villain. I think it might have been confusing for those who haven't heard of Jekyll and Hyde, but who hasn't?

I especially liked your description of the mental state of Jekyll/Hyde during his transformations. Very schizophrenic. Very creepy.

[Hornycountryboy]

Bump

[JackassTales]

Originally Posted by ejls

Holy freakin' hell, Jack! Okay, so I read the comments prior to reading the story, but that was a week ago. I just read this and total forgot it was Jeckyll/Hyde.

The writing was excellent, from the beginning descriptions to the end. The dialogue was in keeping with the era. It was raw and it was violent and it had me hold my breath at times. While I understand people's feelings regarding the torture he inflicted, it made perfect sense in the story.

Outstanding, sir - despite the name of your female victim. Really, really well-done.

I believe the name 'Ellen' is entirely appropriate since you were the one to plant the insidious germ of violence and brutality into my head with your picture. Let's have bunny rabbits next time.

[JackassTales]

Originally Posted by wantsomefun

Quite the departure for you!

Even though I had heard a bit about your story before reading it, I wasn't really prepared.

Damn.

"I have daughters."

Excellently done. Definitely not a feel-good story (I hope!) but a fascinating take on the Jeckyll/Hyde theme.

Yes, a departure it was. I was having a shitty week so I guess I took it out on my readers. All is well now and I'm back to my incest filth.

[JackassTales]

Originally Posted by Daddycums

Pretty dark, JT. Definitely not what I expect from you. In fact, if I didn't know you wrote it, I would probably put you at the bottom of my list of guesses about the author.

I'll admit I didn't really like it, but only because I don't like violent stories. The writing style itself was excellent, and I think you did a masterful job of describing the dual identities of the villain. I think it might have been confusing for those who haven't heard of Jekyll and Hyde, but who hasn't?

I especially liked your description of the mental state of Jekyll/Hyde during his transformations. Very schizophrenic. Very creepy.

If I remember correctly, DC, back in your previous incarnation on this site, you boasted that I had a writing style that anyone could recognize. I guess the Grand Duke de Authorism had to be shown a different style from me.

I don't like violent stories either...but, this is what the picture inspired!

[Hornycountryboy]

Bump

[ahorsewithnoname]

bump

[ahorsewithnoname]

motherfucking bump to get these stories to the top and JoeFuckheadDirty (and his little troll pornvision) below

[Wee Hector]

bump

[Hornycountryboy]

All aboard the bump train! Choo choo!

[Dizzyworks673]

Going for a ride on the crazy bump train!

[DoyleGentry]

bump

[darthel0101]

bump

[Dizzyworks673]

Bump

[Dizzyworks673]

bump

[Dizzyworks673]

Bump

[ahorsewithnoname]

Last weekend of voting bump!

[BlackRonin]

You know one of the many stories I considered doing for this challenge as also a Jekyll & Hyde story. Something in the air, maybe?

I was surprised by how much I liked this, actually. The problem with Stevenson's Jekyll & Hyde is that it's a mystery story to which everyone, everyone, already knows the answer when they pick up the book. This was a clever and wry approach that reinvests the story with the ability to surprise and shock readers. The trick of simply referring to the characters only by their (rarely cited) first names is almost brilliant. While I thought some of the dialogue fell unintentionally flat, I did enjoy Hyde's hammy narration, which of course is entirely appropriate to the character.

In terms of criticism, I'm never one for disclaimers or overly long introductions that "warn" the reader. We're all adults here (well, actually, experience dictates that a couple of us probably aren't, but let's not dwell on that...) and disclaimers usually seem either patronizing (as if the readers are such delicate flowers that they need to be taken care of) or to indicate a lack of confidence on the part of the writer in the story's ability to stand up for itself. Bear in mind, I'm not saying either of those are the case here...but that's still how it sounds. And really, they're simply awkward, ungainly additions that break the mystique of the story. I think any story, regardless of the content, should stand or fall on its own without laying out any extra cushioning for its landing. Particularly when, as further experience dictates, warning the easily offended does not make them any less offended. In fact, it seems to prime them.

[Hornycountryboy]

One last push!