Fifty Shades of Grey - a discussion

[cijababe]

I did a preliminary search on this, so please forgive me if it's already been covered. As I read recently that this had broken records on the number of paperbacks sold n a day(or was it a week?). Even further, it has sold faster than Harry Potter......

If you haven't already read it, there may be spoilers. I actually haven't finished it yet so bear with any incongruities please.

I knew the reviews were not good, but needed to read this to find out what the fuss was about - and it's my holiday, I can read it on my Kindle without anyone knowing. Yes it's poorly written, and I was amused to see it is written in first person present tense, something for which I was pulled up on when I submitted stories for this site.

One thing I find irritating is the depiction of the main male character, which has been pointed out many times in reviews - of course he is not only unbearably handsome, he is wealthy too. Money does of course give him free reign to play power games, but physically perfect characters always have me gritting my teeth. Yet another is the innocence of the female lead. Yes this is an important foil for a BDSM relationship, but really - at 21 she has had no previous relationships, has never had an orgasm and never played with herself? Please........

In any case, what I have been wondering is, how did this get published and what has made it so popular? Has this broken the genre for other writers? Will we see a backlash in the future over how sado masochistic relationships and/or activities debase women?

Personally I find it extremely interesting that people are curious enough to explore the theme, and in a mainstream way rather than covertly through sites such as this. Is the genre a guilty pleasure or are more people genuinely interested in pursuing it in real life? I fear that some will indulge their fantasies and cause harm to others, without knowing the dangers. My curiosity lead me to read up on erotic bondage, and to be honest, it scared me silly to see how easy it is for things to go badly wrong.

So, is this trend liberating or dangerous - please discuss, I'm very interested to hear your opinions and insights.

[Baby Girl]

I've just ordered the trilogy, so I will get back to once some reading is done.

[Furred Goddess]

The way it got so popular was it originally started out as a fan-fiction of the Twilight series that was supposed to take place in an Alternate Universe. Twilight fans convinced the author to change the names and market it as being original.

[cijababe]

Now I feel dumb - a spin-off of Twilight? Ugh

[Furred Goddess]

Originally Posted by cijababe

Now I feel dumb - a spin-off of Twilight? Ugh

Yeah, a few months a go, there was a write-up about it that I saw on Yahoo News. I can't find the exact article but putting the two titles into the search pulled up several articles talking about how it started as a fanfiction of Twilight. Yeah... don't feel dumb, I am sure loads of mature and wonderfully intelligent women fell for that drivel.

[crackedjaguar@hotmail.com]

The were great orgies and much debauchery in the years leading up to the fall of Rome... "Shrugs" its a sign of things to come I think we might have another ten or 15 years before someone realizes that our society has lost it's moral compass..

[cijababe]

Bump for those on the other side of the pond who might not have seen it; any more views or opinions?

[BukkakeGirl]

I'm currently on page 132, so far I'm enjoying it but I've been told by friends who have read it all the way through that it's a disappointment.

[Hornycountryboy]

Originally Posted by cijababe

One thing I find irritating is the depiction of the main male character, which has been pointed out many times in reviews - of course he is not only unbearably handsome, he is wealthy too. Money does of course give him free reign to play power games, but physically perfect characters always have me gritting my teeth. Yet another is the innocence of the female lead. Yes this is an important foil for a BDSM relationship, but really - at 21 she has had no previous relationships, has never had an orgasm and never played with herself? Please........

Alright I have never and will most likey never read these books, but I will say this much. Why is it so hard to believe that a 21 year old female to never have played with herself? Or to never have had an orgasm?

When my wife and I were dating we were 20 almost 21 we both never had a sexual partner, and we didn't start having sex till we were 22, and till this day my wife has never played with herself.

Now we're not into BDSM, but our sex life is great our biggest complaint is we're not having sex as much as we like to, but with our jobs and two young kids its better than some who don't have kids.

After reading some of the comments and seeing its based off of the Twilight series, makes me glad I didn't jump on the band wagon to read it.

[N.E. Woman]

I haven't read the books, but from other posts it deals with BDSM. The funny/ scary thing is that one of our grocery chains is selling it. I am afraid people will take things too far because they don't know their partners boundaries or anything about the lifestyle.

Maybe I will read it during my summer vacation.
NEW

[enslavedprincess1994]

[cijababe]

Originally Posted by Hornycountryboy

Alright I have never and will most likey never read these books, but I will say this much. Why is it so hard to believe that a 21 year old female to never have played with herself? Or to never have had an orgasm?

When my wife and I were dating we were 20 almost 21 we both never had a sexual partner, and we didn't start having sex till we were 22, and till this day my wife has never played with herself.

Now we're not into BDSM, but our sex life is great our biggest complaint is we're not having sex as much as we like to, but with our jobs and two young kids its better than some who don't have kids.

After reading some of the comments and seeing its based off of the Twilight series, makes me glad I didn't jump on the band wagon to read it.

Ok maybe it's not so far fetched - considering this is a porn site, maybe I lost sight of the ball. I was a virgin at 21, only had two shortlived relationships before then - but I'm pretty sure I'd have freaked out if anyone had tried anything kinky with me; I was scared stiff of men and/or sex as it was. However, I knew what an orgasm was and how to get one.

I'm now on the second book - God help me I didn't realise it was a trilogy, and I have to keep going to the bitter end. It's very mawkish and sentimental and I'm kind of hooked, but not in a good way

[Blablahblah]

Ehh I feel like the only reason they're selling so well so widely is that people can read a dirty romance book without having a picture of a sexy half naked couple on the cover. No longer must women cover their books to hide clearly raunchy titles! Forgive me if I'm wrong, but this is the first Very popular erotic book in awhile. If I were going to read an erotic book in public it would definitely be that one. The writing is crappy and unbelievable... I wa going to put the book down when I read "put the pedal to the metal" because ouch! The cliches are killing me! If I remember school correctly, reading a book about vampires made me satanic! Now it just makes me a twilight fan(oh god help me D: ). This book has simply broken the boundary of publicly reading (crappy) erotica.Geez they should all just come on here>.<

[Hornycountryboy]

So let me get this straight, these books are poorly written, but yet are highly popular. Sounds like a bad fad, and in about two weeks people will be on something else, that will probably be even worse.

Then again I might be wrong.

[Puggie]

Originally Posted by Blablahblah

Ehh I feel like the only reason they're selling so well so widely is that people can read a dirty romance book without having a picture of a sexy half naked couple on the cover. No longer must women cover their books to hide clearly raunchy titles! >.<

Nope all they need to do now is buy a kindle they can read what they like

get a 3G one and they can even read from this site and the many others out there that cater for erotic stories

[cijababe]

If she makes another reference to biting her lip again, I will scream. I hate repetition.

But - note that it broke records for sales of PAPERBACKS; it's not all being read on Kindle........

Sadly I bought one before it went 3G. But I did manage to download one of my stories onto it as an experiment, so supposedly I could get some of the stories here onto it with a bit of jiggery pokery.

[enjoyingtheview]

I havent read the book so I will only comment on the topic of BDSM becoming mainstream. Whether it will be liberating or dangerous would depend on who sees it. Much like the teaching of homosexuality to elementary school children here in CA, it is likely to bring liberation to many who have not understood the urges and feelings they have. That being said, it will be dangerous to those who dont understand it or feel hatred toward it since it will bring all that up in the open for public discussion. A very sharp double edged sword, and I can't tell you which side is going to win out with fewer cuts.

The thing that gets me is why has it become so popular when everyone says the writing is horrible? Does the topic attract so many? Real sex on HBO has shown some stuff very "out there" by my standards and they have been doing it for years. Topic isnt exaclty new.

[curiousscouser]

I managed to get all three books on special offer a little while ago on Amazon, and read them all in one weekend - there's not much substance to them.

To be honest I felt the BDSM was very poorly portrayed, and I think if it does encourage people to experiment they're not going to get much further than furry handcuffs and light spanking. I can't see it drawing people into a full-on BDSM lifestyle as it really doesn't make it sound that appealing. Layla the mental sub is a figure of scorn and pity, and the only other BDSM relationship in the book was between Christian and Elena. I thought that had more potential until the author decided to make her some bitter old harridan, then it just became a huge cliche.

The books reminded me of Jackie Collins. They are entirely improbable, a multi-billionaire meeting a shy virgin, showering her with gifts and tempting her into a hedonistic lifestyle, ending with her rescuing him with the purity of her undying love.

My cousin posted a review to Facebook that summed up my feelings too: Fifty Shades of Grey is seventy shades of shite.

For a more realistic view of BDSM session-play I'd recommend Subtext by Kate Marley. She doesn't bite her lip and her Dom's hair is neither bronze nor tousled. There are no helicopters or yachts and nobody gets held at gunpoint. It's lighter than The Ties That Bind and is highly erotic in places.

[cijababe]

Wow CS - you must be a speedy reader, and I Thought I was. Mind you, I'm not reading nonstop.

I've never read any Joan Collins, she never appealed to me. Those stereotypes do irk me, I much prefer a little incongruity in my characters and scenarios, or someone ordinary put into an extraordinary situation.

I find certain books put me in a particular mind set and am fighting it here. However, I am not biting my lip :P

When I've finished this trilogy, I'll certainly try your recommendations CS - thanks a lot, wish I'd asked you before

[curiousscouser]

Haha, I don't watch much TV so do a LOT of reading! That said, they're pretty insubstantial books.

Yes, no biting your lip. I'd try to avoid rolling your eyes too, though I confess I spent most of my time rolling my eyes as I read until I felt a little sea-sick

I only ever read one Jackie Collins book, but it was very similar - a designer-label fuelled bonkfest between unfeasably attractive characters in glamorous locations.

When I found out about the Twilight link a few things made more sense. Christian has not one single friend. Not a school-friend, not a teenage buddy, not a golf friend, nothing. Makes sense if he's meant to be a vampire, but sets the nutter alarms into standby if he's just a man.

I've been a bit scathing about the books but if you're prepared to suspend your disbelief and overlook some awful cliches and bad writing then they are entertaining enough fluff. They will do well at the moment because they're undemanding beach reads and have enough sex to keep things interesting on holiday. Not that you'd need that Cija, I'm sure you keep things more than interesting!

I read that the film rights have already been picked up. For the life of me I can't see how these books will make a decent film. There's not a huge amount of plot and what there is (the sub siege in the second book, the kidnap in the third) feels more than a little contrived. I suspect the film (if it's ever made) will diverge from the books by a substantial amount!

[DoyleGentry]

I know a number of people in the BDSM lifestyle and they all have said that even though it is well written...it is highly inaccurate when it comes to things about BDSM.

They all say it is a good story, but it is not completely correct on a lot of things about BDSM.

[ejls]

My oldest daughter read the entire trilogy in 4 days - she loved it. She also loved the Twilight series.

A friend tells me they are not the best written, but is 3/4 of the way through the second book. She reports it was a bit slow at first, but it's picking up.

Our largest chain book store has a whole section on erotic material. Apparently, sales have picked up. I have a feeling I'm going to buy the series this weekend.

[DoyleGentry]

Originally Posted by ejls

My oldest daughter read the entire trilogy in 4 days - she loved it. She also loved the Twilight series.

A friend tells me they are not the best written, but is 3/4 of the way through the second book. She reports it was a bit slow at first, but it's picking up.

Our largest chain book store has a whole section on erotic material. Apparently, sales have picked up. I have a feeling I'm going to buy the series this weekend.

If your daughter owns the series, borrow it from her first rather than buy it until you know you like it or not.

[KatieColorado]

I read the first book. It was a challenge to say the least. The author does not have a great way with word (says the girl writing her first piece of erotica) and the characters just aren't believable. The Hunger Games were Pulitzer material by comparison. The sex wasn't really all that steamy and for a virgin, Anastasia was a very well accomplished little whore with her being able to deep throat him and swallow on her first try and totally being open to anal beads, spankings, etc.

It really wasn't all that good in my opinion.

[ejls]

Originally Posted by DoyleGentry

If your daughter owns the series, borrow it from her first rather than buy it until you know you like it or not.

I would have to fly to Florida to pick them up.

[Hornycountryboy]

So this begs the question, why is there so much fuss about these books?

It seems to me so far there are more people saying they don't like the way its written here, but on facebook it seems that's all the women are talking about.

[Hornycountryboy]

Originally Posted by ejls

I would have to fly to Florida to pick them up.

Have her ship them to you, and when you are done ship them back. Would be a lot cheaper than buying brand new books.

[robert01%]

the wife and all her friends have all three books and love them

[KatieColorado]

Originally Posted by Hornycountryboy

Have her ship them to you, and when you are done ship them back. Would be a lot cheaper than buying brand new books.

They are dirt cheap on Kindle or Nook. I got the whole trilogy for $14.95 on Amazon for my Kindle. They were on sale at the time though but point being you can get them pretty cheap.

[cijababe]

I was an avid reader as a teenager, and didn't really understand what good writing was, so I read a lot of dross along with the classics. I clearly remember finding a sci fi book in my parents' bedroom which I quite enjoyed, but one passage really puzzled me; of course it was a sex scene and I had no idea what was going on - goodness knows how young I was.

My username comes from a 60's trashy fantasy trilogy which I go back and read from time to time. It's reasonably well written if improbable, as fantasy is, but what captivated me was the storyline and scenarios. Again when I first read them the sex scenes were puzzling (though less so).

I suppose what I'm trying to say that sometimes the quality of the writing isn't important - what is, is that it engages me for some reason. First of all I'm reading this trilogy to see why it has been so popular, but I suspect what draws people apart from the erotica, is that it's emotionally engaging in a certain way that many women will find attractive. For me it's too cloying and the other characters not well enough developed, and there's only one narrative strand. I really enjoy books that have more than one thing going on and greatly admire authors who can interweave different stories.

I'm pretty good at 'reading' a plot in that I often see where the plot is going (this applies to films too) so I'm rarely surprised. Although I don't identify with Ana or feel attracted to Christian, nonetheless I want to know where the plot leads, though there are only so many possibilities.

[cijababe]

Originally Posted by curiousscouser

Haha, I don't watch much TV so do a LOT of reading! That said, they're pretty insubstantial books.

Yes, no biting your lip. I'd try to avoid rolling your eyes too, though I confess I spent most of my time rolling my eyes as I read until I felt a little sea-sick

I only ever read one Jackie Collins book, but it was very similar - a designer-label fuelled bonkfest between unfeasably attractive characters in glamorous locations.

When I found out about the Twilight link a few things made more sense. Christian has not one single friend. Not a school-friend, not a teenage buddy, not a golf friend, nothing. Makes sense if he's meant to be a vampire, but sets the nutter alarms into standby if he's just a man.

I've been a bit scathing about the books but if you're prepared to suspend your disbelief and overlook some awful cliches and bad writing then they are entertaining enough fluff. They will do well at the moment because they're undemanding beach reads and have enough sex to keep things interesting on holiday. Not that you'd need that Cija, I'm sure you keep things more than interesting!

I read that the film rights have already been picked up. For the life of me I can't see how these books will make a decent film. There's not a huge amount of plot and what there is (the sub siege in the second book, the kidnap in the third) feels more than a little contrived. I suspect the film (if it's ever made) will diverge from the books by a substantial amount!

I hate it when books are so quickly turned to films. It makes the book so much less personal and plot changes irritate me no end. I have managed to avoid the Twilight phenomenon so far, and intend not to get drawn in; the characters look far too drippy and Emo-ish. It never attracted me as the new vampire genre doesn't do it for me. Give me Bela Lugosi or Christopher Lee and Hammer Horror any day

[curiousscouser]

Originally Posted by cijababe

I hate it when books are so quickly turned to films. It makes the book so much less personal and plot changes irritate me no end. I have managed to avoid the Twilight phenomenon so far, and intend not to get drawn in; the characters look far too drippy and Emo-ish. It never attracted me as the new vampire genre doesn't do it for me. Give me Bela Lugosi or Christopher Lee and Hammer Horror any day

My cousin lent me the Twilight books so I could see what all the fuss was. The middle two books just felt like filler to me, but the first book and the final book had enough to keep me reading. The first book did feel a little teenagery, but I guess that's unsurprising as that's the target market.
I didn't love them, and I found Bella to be a pretty insipid character, but they were... OK.

The first True Blood novel, on the other hand, I thought was great. Again, it's not Tolstoy, but it's an interesting premise and there's an actual plot to it aside from the vampire thing. There's humour in it too, and it stands a re-read, which Twilight never has for me.

That's one thing I didn't mention about 50 Shades; the humour. There were a few little phrases that made me laugh. When she calls the doctor Doctor Depo-provera, or calls the car the Submissive Special, for example. It doesn't make up for the mawkish sentimentality of the books but is at least something positive I can say about them!

[yagamilight]

Originally Posted by crackedjaguar@hotmail.com

The were great orgies and much debauchery in the years leading up to the fall of Rome... "Shrugs" its a sign of things to come I think we might have another ten or 15 years before someone realizes that our society has lost it's moral compass..

What? Because porn is being marketed at women for pretty much the first time ever you think that's a sign of society losing it's moral compass?

It's a terrible book from a feminist point of view, the lead character just becomes a slave to a man. You can tell it was originally a Twilight fan-fiction in that sense, JL whatshername and Stephanie Meyer obviously don't have much respect for their own gender. I think the fact that a porn (let's face it, that's what it is) is really popular for women right now is a good thing, the fact that it's THIS particular porn though, is not.

[cijababe]

Ploughing my way through the second book - the constant sex scenes are becoming boring, especially as the BDSM element has diminished. Who would have thought I'd nod off reading erotica?

[sockaraus]

Originally Posted by yagamilight

What? Because porn is being marketed at women for pretty much the first time ever you think that's a sign of society losing it's moral compass?

It's a terrible book from a feminist point of view, the lead character just becomes a slave to a man. You can tell it was originally a Twilight fan-fiction in that sense, JL whatshername and Stephanie Meyer obviously don't have much respect for their own gender. I think the fact that a porn (let's face it, that's what it is) is really popular for women right now is a good thing, the fact that it's THIS particular porn though, is not.

Porn being marketed at women for pretty much the first time?
What fuckin planet you living in? Google it.
Anybody remember Red Shoe Diaries?

[curiousscouser]

Originally Posted by sockaraus

Porn being marketed at women for pretty much the first time?
What fuckin planet you living in? Google it.
Anybody remember Red Shoe Diaries?

I remember them vividly. I got extremely excited thinking I was going to see David Duchovny in porn (albeit softcore).
How disappointing.

In the UK we used to have black lace books - porn written by and for women, sold in high street booksellers. Not sure if they are still going, but the last time I saw them was in the early 90s.

[Rutger5]

I don't know if its well written (I heard not)as I haven't read it but it certainly has helped a lot of husbands have sex with their wives in NYC. Supposedly there has even been a run on housefraus buying rope in hardware stores.

I wouldn't worry about most people going too far, they are just playing at B&D and S&M. Just The Story Of O for theTwilight generation I figure.
r5

[cijababe]

I've stalled partway through the second one - I don't think I can go on. It's so repetitive and wallowing.......

[curiousscouser]

Originally Posted by cijababe

I've stalled partway through the second one - I don't think I can go on. It's so repetitive and wallowing.......

I wish I could tell you it picks up, but it really doesn't. Book 3 is even worse. Let me know if you'd like me to tell you how it ends!

[cijababe]

Gah - I ploughed through it. No spoilers please CS but thanks for offering Just trying to decide whether to read something more edifying or download the last one. She referenced Tess of the D'urbervilles so I have that, but I'm not fond of Thomas Hardy. I guess I'll give that a shot first.

[DoyleGentry]

Originally Posted by ejls

I would have to fly to Florida to pick them up.

Have her mail them? Would be cheaper than buying them...also, wouldn't you like to visit her again?

[SecretSexyBlogger]

Why are the books so popular? Probably because a lot of people are repressed - especially women.

A lot of the women I know who love these books struggle with their own sexuality, are single and fantasise about meeting a man who will sweep them off their feet. He's rich, successful, handsome and domineering. Everything a handful of the wallflowers I know love.

In addition, the female character isn't so much open minded and exploring as much as she is being lead. Know the most enticing part for those girls about "being lead" to do something dirty? They can say that he "made" them do it (not in a rape way, but as in they don't have to talk about their wants or needs) and they still get to live out their dirtiest fantasies.

The books have inaccuracies, aren't brilliant pieces of literature, but they're super popular because they are a break from a lot of womens monotonous sex lives. Same as porn is that outlet for so many men.

[honeyjasmin]

awesome

[cijababe]

Free at last! The middle book had to be the most tedious, and the last one started off badly, but there was at last some plot to finish off. I still wish I'd managed to find something better to read on holiday.

[Obscene Cupcake]

Originally Posted by Hornycountryboy

Alright I have never and will most likey never read these books, but I will say this much. Why is it so hard to believe that a 21 year old female to never have played with herself? Or to never have had an orgasm?
.

agreed.

[Obscene Cupcake]

Originally Posted by DoyleGentry

I know a number of people in the BDSM lifestyle and they all have said that even though it is well written...it is highly inaccurate when it comes to things about BDSM.

They all say it is a good story, but it is not completely correct on a lot of things about BDSM.

unless they don't emphasize the fact that the sub in reality has the real control via safeword, and that bdsm is consensual, I don't see how that could be true, since each bdsm experience is different per person.


on the other hand, when I read bdsm stuff, I look for noncon- not really bdsm things that turn into dubcon. I don't look for accurate, since I know what a real healthy bdsm relationship is like.

[JayneyRedd]

All I have done so far is to flick through the book (I only bought it today), and I am underwhelmed by it.

I probably shouldn't comment until I have actually read the book, but basing my opinion solely on that quick flick through, I think that there are at least a dozen writers on here who could produce better prose than that - it's not a brilliant work of erotic literature it's simply the only one to have (so far) gained mainstream acceptance.

[patched]

my wife has read all 3 books ,she enjoyed them but didnt think they were the best and no where near as raunchy as they had made out

[thatcuriousone]

I can find better reads on here than I can find of that terrible book. And its frightening how Meyer has influenced the mass public with her crappy books if that connection is proven.

[funcpl37642]

My personal opinion - yeah the books are pretty much crappily written (especially #2 and #3.) - I have no idea to the twilight reference above. (I've not seen the movie) But what I think appeals about the book is that it allows/gives women a fantasy out of their "social norm", while being in the "social norm" if that makes sense. Normally any "erotica" book would be considered dirty, nasty, etc if she were caught reading it out in public (like on an airplane, etc.) much less one written with bondage and/or controlling as a theme. (especially with today's women's lib) It would be appalling as far as "political correctness" goes. So by this being on the bestseller's list, it lets them read erotica without being ashamed of it. (remember I'm going on about general society, not a porn board society, lol)

And in reality, I also think it helps or can help the women's husbands, bf's, or whatever understand their partners a little better, by opening up dialogs that would otherwise never be discussed before. I don't forsee a flocking towards hardcore bondage in general, but I do see some experimentation with floggers, spankings, etc. And Ben-Wa balls, (local sex toy shop girl said sails of those have increased quite a bit, but not much of the other items have) to which I have a feeling most will be disappointed with those....

That's the basics of why I think it's so popular, but who am I to know?