13 boy and a 15year old girl

[Boy25]

I have been reading on here and love most of the stories so I thought I would post my first. so please tell me what you think.

Me a 13 year old boy was at my girlfriends house. She was 15 at the time and was a normally horny. Can say I did not like this. She would getthat way and would get me to finger her. This happened every time we were alone. She would give me a blow job or jerk me after words.

Well this story takes place at her house. On a week end her and my parents were out of town. So we decided I would stay he night with her.

I though that it would be like we normally did thing I finger her and she Jack me, but to my suprize when I got there her and her friend were waiting on me naked in the front room watching porn. When I walked in she said take off all your clothes so I did. She said that it was her night to be in charge an I was to obay everything she said. She then told me to sit on the cough and Jack off to the movie so she could watch. Her and her 14 year old friend just stared at me. Then my girl friend came over and jacked me hard until I came all over her. At about this time it was about 11 pm and I was so sleepie. My girl friend told me to sleep on her bed. I woke up at a out 4 my girl and her friend were taking turns sucking on me. I have amet it was a good way to wake up. O was so horny I started to play with her pussie and be for I knew it she was climing on top of me. Then started riding me until she came then I filped her over and fucked her hard until we both came. We were on the bed side by side when her friend just starts liking the cum off me. Later on we went to the beach and she made me where a white swims suit. She knew when it got wet you could see right through it. Which is what she wanted so I did not make a figh of it. Sense we had a privet spot on the beach we could do what we wanted.after I got in the water she called me up on the beach and told me to rub sun block on her. I did and she was so hot I got a Boner right then she saw that and played with she pulled my trunks to my ankels and started sucking me off she would not quit e en after I came she made me so tried that I could not move. When I finally did she helped me pull my pants up and right when we walked into the house her parents walked in. She took me to my room and jerked me one more time he parents her my sounds and walked in I was so scared but her mom just said finsh up and get down stairs so we did when we got their she said for use to go to my house for a little while and we came back at around 4 and walked in on her parents in the living room we just left I brought her back around 10 and her parnts were watching a movie and I left her at the front door kissed her good night and left



Tell me what you think and if you think I should right more sorry about the typing on my I pod

[FamilyFuckerIII]

Originally Posted by Boy25

I have been reading on here and love most of the stories so I thought I would post my first. so please tell me what you think.

Me a 13 year old boy was at my girlfriends house. She was 15 at the time and was a normally horny. Can say I did not like this. She would get that way and would get me to finger her. This happened every time we were alone. She would give me a blow job or jerk me after words.

Well this story takes place at her house. On a week end her and my parents were out of town. So we decided I would stay the night with her.

I though that it would be like we normally did thing I finger her and she Jack me, but to my surprise when I got there her and her friend were waiting on me naked in the front room watching porn. When I walked in she said take off all your clothes so I did.

She said that it was her night to be in charge an I was to obey everything she said. She then told me to sit on the couch and jack off to the movie so she could watch. Her and her 14 year old friend just stared at me.

Then my girl friend came over and jacked me hard until I came all over her. At about this time it was about 11 pm and I was so sleepy. My girl friend told me to sleep on her bed. I woke up at about 4 my girl and her friend were taking turns sucking on me. I have a bet it was a good way to wake up.

I was so horny I started to play with her pussy and be for I knew it she was climbing on top of me. Then started riding me until she came then I flipped her over and fucked her hard until we both came. We were on the bed side by side when her friend just starts liking the cum off me.

Later on we went to the beach and she made me where a white swims suit. She knew when it got wet you could see right through it. Which is what she wanted so I did not make a fight of it. Since we had a private spot on the beach we could do what we wanted.after I got in the water she called me up on the beach and told me to rub sun block on her.

I did and she was so hot I got a Boner right then she saw that and played with she pulled my trunks to my ankles and started sucking me off she would not quit and after I came she made me so tired that I could not move.

When I finally did she helped me pull my pants up and right when we walked into the house her parents walked in. She took me to my room and jerked me one more time he parents her my sounds and walked in I was so scared but her mom just said finish up and get down stairs so we did when we got their she said for use to go to my house for a little while and we came back at around 4 and walked in on her parents in the living room we just left I brought her back around 10 and her parents were watching a movie and I left her at the front door kissed her good night and left



Tell me what you think and if you think I should right more sorry about the typing on my I pod

It is a good first story, but too brief. I understand about the typing. psp is better to type on. Make a new paragraph every 4 or 5 sentences, and try to use punctuation. Describe your girlfriend in more detail, maybe the setting a little, even something about how closely you timed what happened with the two of you and her parents arriving home like "she was working me over and just before I came hr mom peeked her head in the room. I held back from cumming until her mom left. We were to finish up and come downstairs after" or something like that

EDIT: I spaced it how I described, and got a few of the errors out. Something like the spacing I did to your quoted story is ideal especially if you are going to be brief.

[tara.girl]

Short. Sounds like a real life, though. I liked that.

[greyghost694]

read what familyfuckerIII wrote and compare it to yours to see how much better it reads

[Daddycums]

The story's interesting. It has a lot of potential.

Let me suggest, however, that regardless of what you type it on, next time you proofread and edit on a desktop or laptop before posting. With an hour of editing, this story could be pretty good. As it is, well, it's not.

I apologize if I sound insulting; I'm actually trying to be encouraging. You have the makings of a good story here, but you stopped writing before it was finished. I don't mean that you need to continue the story from where it ended, I mean there's more work to be done on what you have.

My suggestion is to go ahead and clean up the story, then post it again in this same thread. Not only will it be more enjoyable for the readers, but it will give you practice editing. Learn that, and I think you could be a great author.