Joke Thread

[ShakeZula]

Post a joke, that simple. I'll start it off.

Paddy was driving down the street in a sweat because he had an important meeting & couldn't find a parking place.

Looking up to heaven he said, "Lord take pity on me. If you find me a
parking place I will go to Mass every Sunday for the rest of me life and give up me Irish Whiskey".

Miraculously, a parking place appeared. Paddy looked up again and said, "Never mind I found one."

[bnthrdntht]

lmao ok so i have one it's really corny but if i'm in a bad mood it always makes me laugh

Momma Onion and Daddy Onion had a Baby Onion and they loved him so much. Well one day Baby Onion was riding his bike in the road and he was hit by a car. Well he was rushed to the hospital and Momma and Daddy Onion were pacing outside the operating room crying and crying and crying.

Well the doctor came out and told Momma and Daddy Onion, "i have good news and bad news, which do you want to hear first"

"The good news is your son will be fine, but he'll be a vegetable for the rest of his life"

[nay_nay0790]

LOL

There was a family livin 2gether(mom,dad,and son tommy)

It was tommy's bday. mom said tommy im gettin in the shower, so tommy said "can i get in too?" mon said no, so tommy said "but its my birthday"so mom said ok.

when they got in the shower tommy said "mommy wats those big things?" mom said" oh those are my coconuts" tommy said "wats that hairy thing?" mom said "thats mommy's jungle".

so they got out of the shower. then tommy went to his dad. his dad was gettin in the shower. so tommy said "dad can i get in too?" dad said "no u just got in the shower" so tommy said "please its my birthday"
so dad said"ok"

when they got in the shower tommy said "daddy wats that big long thing?" dad said "oh thats just my snake"

now mom and dad were goin to be and tommy came in and said "mom and dad can i sleep with yall?" they said "no!!"tommy said "please its my birthday" so they said "ok come on in"

so after about a half hour mom and dad thought tommy were sleep so they started havin sex.all of a sudden they heard tommy scream "daddy's snake is going into mommy jungle and the coconuts are shakin in the tree and they are about to fall out!"

[baller16]

wow I think I heard that when I was in 2nd grade

damn I had one but I forgot it. I'll have to think of one.

[baller16]

apparently I can't edit posts for some reason.

Okay I thought of one not great but it's off the top of my head

A guy goes to a cathouse with 10 bucks

A week later he finds out that he got crabs. He confronts the hooker that he was with and she tells him "For 10 bucks what did you expect to get, lobster?"

[ShakeZula]

THIS JOKE USES THE "N" WORD...

...but not in a really negative way. I won't spell it out, I'll use astrisks. I don't want to offend anyone more than I have to. It's sort of in the context that if black people use it among/about other black people it's okay. Even though I myself am not black, I hope anyone who might be offended realizes it's just a joke.

A little black boy is playing in his family's garage when he comes across a can of white paint. He has a brilliant idea and decides to paint himself and be a 'white boy'. He covers himself head to toe and goes in the house to show off.

"Look mom, I'm a white boy!"

"Jesus H. Christ!" she screams, and is so surprised she smacks him across the face. "Boy, you better get upstairs and wash that stuff off before your Daddy comes home or he's gonna beat your ass."

The boy leaves the room and heads for the stairs. As he reaches them meets his older sister, just coming down the stairs.

"Hey sis, I'm a white boy, check it out!"

"Damn!" and she knocks him on his ass. Laughing she said "boy, Daddy's gonna beat yo' ass when he sees you. You better wash that stuff off."

Dejected and a little hurt, the boy picks himself up and makes it up the steps. Here, he meets his older brother. Figuring it was worth one more try, he says "Look bro, I'm a white boy."

"Holy shit!" and he gives him a quick punch, just because he's the older brother and figures he needs to teach his younger brother a lesson about being stupid. It sends him rolling down the steps and his older brother follows. Stepping over him he says, "I can't wait till dad sees you, he's gonna spank yo' ass."

Just as the boy begins to go back up the steps, here comes his father. And sure enough, spanks his ass. "No go upstairs and wash that shit off!"

The boy begins to walk up the steps and mumbles to himself. "I only been a white boy for 10 minutes and I already hate them N******"

Hope no one is too offended by that. If it makes anyone terribly angry, let me know, I'll edit it out. I think it's funny, anyway.

–S–

[baller16]

yeah you really have to be careful when you bring race into jokes. Just make sure you don't get offensive.

by the way that joke was good

[Kimiko]

Okay, here goes the Catholic school bit. You've been warned.

Sister Mary Francis taught the second grade at Our Lady of the Evening School. A strict disciplinarian, she had a unique way of ensuring that her students paid close attention. When they got an answer wrong in front of the class, she would take a hatpin from her hair and stick the child with it!

On this day, Sister Mary Francis was all adither, because the Bishop was coming to observe her class that day. She had drilled her charges mercilessly, and was confident that most of them could withstand the Bishop's questioning.

The Bishop entered the class, and called one little girl up to the front.

"What's your name, child?"

"Emily" said the girl.

"All right, Emily," says the kindly Bishop. "Can you tell me who the first man was?"

"Adam," she replied shyly.

"And who was the first woman?" pressed the Bishop.

"Eve."

"And what did Eve say to Adam?" asked the Bishop.

The little girl hesitated, unsure of the answer. Suddenly, she saw Sister Mary Francis draw back her pin, ready to strike.

"DON'T YOU STICK THAT IN ME!!" shouted Emily.

[bigpat]

little billy,mary,and shaunesy were in class and had to use the word "contagious" in a sentence.

They all thought for a momment and Billy started.
he said" my mom says that when you sneeze you have to cover your mouth 'cause the germs are contagious"

the teacher said "good job Billy, Mary your next."
My mom says that when you bleed it is contagious" teacher replied "okay....Mary, Shaunesy your next."

To which he replied " My fadder and eye wer wahkin down da layn and he says look at that mrs mcminish.. shes painting that fence with a toothbrush....it'll take that cunt ages to finish!"

[Sex_On_My_Mind]

I am sure most have heard the Barbie and Ken joke but what the hell.

Why can`t Ken get Barbie pregnant?

Cause he comes in another box.

[ShakeZula]

Man dies and goes to hell. Satan is checking his big book and looking him over carefully. Finally he decides on this mans eternal punishment.

"Okay, I see here that you're allowed one of three choices for your punishment. Follow me," Satan says, and he leads the man down a long and dark hallway. After a time he stops at a door and guides the man through. Inside, there is a man chained to a table being tortured with fire. Little demons are running with small torches, red hot knives and brands, gleefully burning the poor soul who screams in agony.

"Your first choice," Satan says.

"Um...let me see the other one."

So the man is led to a second door. Here, he finds a man chained to a wall, being whipped repeatedly, his back in bloody tatters and insane with pain.

"Your second choice." Satan says.

"Yeah, can I just see the third one before I make my decision."

So Satan takes him to the third door. Inside this one he sees an old fat man chained to wall with a beautiful woman on her knees infront of him giving the man a blow job.

"Your third choice." Satan says.

"This one looks good, I'll take it."

"Your sure," Satan asks.

"Uh-huh."

Satan walks up to the man and woman and then, tapping the woman's shoulder says, "You can go now, we got your replacement."

[pookey227]

okay i made a post but now its gone

And I noticed the forum got hax0r3d and then AFTER it came back up I posted, NOW its gone!

[Spoiler]

How do you circumsize a Redneck? You kick his sister in the jaw

[oldiegoody]

What is the similarity between the Starship Enterprise and a roll of toilet paper? .....They both circle Uranus, looking for Clingons!

[oldiegoody]

Here's one for us Canuks. There is a Frenchman, an Italian and a Newfoundlander discussing the intimate details of their marriages. The Frenchman starts out " after I makes ze loove wis my wife ze first time, I pours ze champaign on her belly, and ze bubles drive her wild!". The Italian replies "aftera I makesa love toa my wifea the firsta time, I breaks open the pillowa and I blows the feathersa around on her boy, ita drivesa her wild. The Newfie pipes up and says "After I makes love to me wife the first time, I wipes me dick off on the curtains, and bys that really drives her wild!"

[oldiegoody]

What is the difference between a pygmy hunter and a female track star?....A pygmy hunter is a cunning runt!

[piggit]

What did the fish say when it ran into a wall?

Dam.

(that one makes me gigggggggle!!)

[mr_horndog2002]

This one's a little long but I think it's worth it.

There was a priest that was fresh from the seminary, and he was just assigned to his new church.

His first day there he takes a walking tour around town and comes upon a fisherman by the lake. After striking up a conversation with the fisherman, he lets out that he's never been fishing before. The fisherman, wanting to get in good with the priest sets him up with rod and reel

Soon after, the priest gets a hit and pulls in a beautiful fish, the fisherman in all his excitement yells out " Wow, father look at that son of a bitch"

The priest is shocked by the foul language and says so.

The fisherman, armed with the knowledge the priest has never before caught a fish says to the priest, " No, father that's the kind of fish it is, it's a son of a bitch fish.

The priest, having never fished before, believed the fisherman, and was soon on his way back to church, where he ran into the bishop.

"Well father, I see you've been fishing and what a beauty she is." The bishop said to the priest.

The priest was very proud of his catch and said loudly to the bishop, " That's right bishop, I caught this son of a bitch MYSELF."

Well of course the bishop was offended by the crude language and the priest had to explain to the bishop about the name thing.

The bishop, happy to hear about the name asked the priest what he was going to do with the fish. " Eat it, " was his reply.

The bishop asks the priest if he knew how to clean the fish, well no he doesn't, he's never fished before, and the bishop offers to show him how.

When they get to the kitchen they run into the reverend mother, and the priest has to explain how he caught the son of a bitch and how the bishop is going to show him how to clean the son of a bitch, well the good reverend mother almost faints from all the rude language. But the priest quickly explains the name thing to her and everything was cool.

The reverend mother asked the priest if he had a good receipe and of course he didn't because he'd never fished before.

So there they are in the kitchen, the fish is cleaned, and the reverend mother is explaining how to cook the fish, when the phone rings. The pope is in town and wants to visit that church for dinner that night, would that be ok, ( like they could turn down the pope anyhow)

Now the reverend mother is all freaked out about what to serve for dinner. The priest reminds her about that part in the bible about feeding all those people that time with the fish.

Cool, she thought fish for dinner.

Later that evening the priest, the bishop, and the reverend mother are sitting to dinner with the pope. When the pope comments about how tasty the fish is, and wonders just what kind of fish it is.

The priest says to the pope, " Your holiness, I must explain. I have never fished before today and I caught the son of a bitch, but the bishop had to show me how to clean the son of a bitch and the reverend mother had this wonderful receipe to cook the son of a bitch.

The popekicked back in his chair, smiled and said.
" WOW, you fuckers are all right"

[Bukkake Bunny]

What do lesbians cook for dinner?





They don't cook. They eat out.




Before anyone gets mad... that was provided by my roommate.

[budgreeen]

How do you circumcise a whale?



anyone.....anyone?


With four skin divers

[WhaWhaWha]

I heard they use whales foreskin to make wallets.
But if you rub them they become suitcases.

[bingo2007]

I got a very large subscription of jokes, cos I subscribed to one that get delivered to my mail everyday. Anyways Enjoy Joke #1

A Chinese man had three daughters, he asked his eldest daughter what kind of man she would like to marry.
"I would like to marry a man with three dragons on his chest," said the eldest daughter.
He then asked his second daughter who she would like to marry.
"I would like to marry a man with two dragons on his chest," said the second daughter.
He finally asked his youngest daughter who she would like to marry.
"I would like to marry a man with one draggin' on the ground," said the youngest daughter.

[bingo2007]

lol:D
These three teenage girls were roommates. One Friday night right after the semester started they all had all gone out on dates, and by chance all came home at about the same time.
The first one came in and said with a smug look on her face, "You know you've been on a good date when you come home with your hair all messed up."
The second one laughed at her and said, "No, no, that's nothing! You know you've been on a good date when you come home with your makeup all smeared."
The third one sat quiet with a blank stare on her face and didn't say a thing for a few minutes. Then she reached under her skirt, removed her panties and threw them against the wall, where they stuck with a loud thud!
She said, "Now THAT'S a good date!!"




:D:D



Three young candidates for the priesthood are told by the Monsignor they have to pass one more test: The Celibacy Test. The Monsignor leads them into a room, and tells them to undress, and a small bell is tied to each man's penis.
In comes a beautiful woman, wearing a sexy belly-dancer costume. She begins to dance sensually around the first candidate. Even before she has begun to remove her veils: *Ting-a-ling* goes the little bell...
"Oh Patrick," says the Monsignor, "I am so disappointed in your complete lack of self-control. Go take a long, cold shower and pray about your carnal weakness."
As Patrick leaves, the dancer then continues, slowly dancing around the second candidate and peeling off her layers of veils. As the last veil drops: *Ting-a-ling* goes the bell...
"Joseph, Joseph," sighs the Monsignor. "You too are unable to withstand your carnal desires. Go take a long, cold shower and pray for forgiveness."
The dancer then proceeds to dance her sensuous dance around the third candidate. Slowly around him she dances, now devoid of all of her veils, but the third candidate remains unmoved.
"James, my son, I am truly proud of you," says the Monsignor. "Only you have the true strength of character needed to become a great priest. Now, go and join your weaker brethren in the shower."
*Ting-a-ling* goes the bell...





:D:D:D
Two ship captains were sitting at the bar one night getting good and lit when one turned to the other and said, "You know what gets me, though, is these damn sailors!
Oh sure, they're fine for the first few weeks, but on those three-month trips at sea they start getting pretty hard up. With all the whacking off going on, it's a wonder any work is getting done, and it's making a mess all over the ship. I don't know what to do!"
The other captain smiles knowingly at his companion. "Oldest trick in the book. You take the crew and divide them into two teams. Then you buy about 50 barrels and put them on the ship. You tell the crew that the team that fills the most barrels wins a bag of gold."
"Well that's a great way to keep the ship clean, but then I'm out a bag of gold every trip!"
"Not so," replied the other captain. "After you get back to port, take all the barrels together and sell them to the wax factory to make into candles. You make a tidy profit every time."
The captain pondered this and the next day, he took his friend's advice and divided the crew, bought a bunch of barrels, and set off to sea. Before long, the crew took to the new system and began filling barrel after barrel.
When they finally reached port, the captain sold the barrels for a huge profit. 'This is great,' thought the captain, 'before long, I'll be able to buy a new boat!'
This went on, voyage after voyage. Then one day, the ship happened back to that very first port. Coming down the gangplank, the captain was surprised to see the cops waiting for him. As they slapped the cuffs on him, the captain cried out, "What's the meaning of this?!"
"You sick bastard," replied the cop. "Remember all those barrels you sold to the candle factory last time you passed through town?"
"Sure," said the captain. "What about 'em?!"
"Well, they made them into candles, sold them to the convent, and now all the nuns are pregnant!"



:D:D:D:D
A woman was shaking out a rug on the balcony of her 17th floor condominium when a sudden gust of wind blew her over the railing.
"Damn, that was stupid," she thought as she fell. "What a way to die."
As she passed the 14th floor, a man standing at his railing caught her in his arms. While she looked at him in disbelieving gratitude, he asked, "Do you suck?"
"No!" she shrieked, aghast.
So, he dropped her. As she passed the 12th floor, another man reached out and caught her.
"Do you screw?" he asked.
"Of course not!" she exclaimed before she could stop herself. He dropped her, too.
The poor woman prayed to God for one more chance. As luck would have it, she was caught a third time, by a man on the eighth floor.
"I suck! I screw!" she screamed in panic.
"Slut!" he said, and dropped her.





:D:D:D:D:D
It's 8:00 AM at a gambling casino. Two bored dealers are waiting around for someone to walk up and try their luck at the craps table.
A very attractive lady comes in and wants to bet twenty-thousand dollars on a single roll of the dice.
The dealers agree.
She says, "I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm bottomless."
With that she strips naked from the waist down, and rolls the dice while yelling, "Momma needs a new pair of pants!"
She then begins jumping up and down and hugging each of the dealers. "YES! I WIN! I WIN!"
With that she picks up her money and clothes and quickly leaves. The dealers just stare at each other dumbfounded. Finally one of them asks, "What did she roll anyway?"
The other answers, "I don't know. I thought YOU were watching the dice!"




Enjoy

[stumbler]

The glitter girl still wins I think.

[tenguy]

A joke me brother-in-law emailed me for St. Patty's Day


Flynn staggered home very late after another evening with his drinking buddy, Paddy.. He took off his shoes to avoid waking his wife, Mary.

He tiptoed as quietly as he could toward the stairs leading to their upstairs bedroom, but misjudged the bottom step. As he caught himself by grabbing the banister, his body swung around and he landed heavily on his rump. A whisk ey bot tle in each back pocket broke and made the landing especially painful.

Managing not to yell, Flynn sprung up, pulled down his pants, and looked in the hall mirror to see that his butt cheeks were cut and bleeding. He managed to quietly find a full box of Band-Aids and began putting a Band-Aid as best he could on each place he saw blood.

He then hid the now almost empty Band-Aid box and shuffled and stumbled his way to bed.

In the morning, Flynn woke up with searing pain in both his head and butt and Mary staring at him from across the room.

She said, 'You were drunk again last night weren't you?'

Flynn said, 'Why you say such a mean thing?'

'Well,' Mary said, 'it could be the open front door, it could be the broken glass at the bottom of the stairs, it could be the drops of blood trailing through the house, it could be your bloodshot eyes, but mostly.....it's all those Band-Aids stuck on the hall mirror.

[Rockprincess]

Thanks for the good laugh, Ten!!!:D
I really enjoyed that joke!!!

[Panty Pervert]

This rabbit goes hopping through the forest, all jovial, singing "I'm a pig, I'm a pig"
A squirrel spots him.
The rabbit continues, "I'm a pig, I'm a pig".
The squirrel wlks up to the rabbit and asks "What are you doing?"
The rabbit smiles, and says "I'm a pig".
The squirrel shakes his head saying "You're not a pig, you're a rabbit!".
The rabbit sneers at the squirrel and in a sardonic undertone says "I'm a Pig!".
So the squirrel snickers and asks "Do you see the long ears you have up top?".
The rabbit looks up, "Yes".
The squirrel asks "Do you see those buck teeth you have up front?".
Looking down the rabbit again answers "Yes".
"Now, do you see the fluffy tail you have around the back? asks the squirrel.
Turnning, looking behind himself, and growng tired of this game the rabbit shrugs his shoulders, and sighs as he answers "Yes"
Confident he has done his job the squirrel says "See, you're a rabbit!".
The rabbit gets on his hind legs, grabs the squirrel, fucks him in the ass, throws him to the ground, and comes in his face.
"I'M A PIG!" exclaims the rabbit
When the squirrel stands up, he could still hear the rabbit singing in the distance..."I'm a pig, I'm a pig"

[smcaaphd]

I don't get it Panty P. I've read it about six times (nah, it was only once, I'm a liar - sue me!) And I STILL don't get it!

[Panty Pervert]

What is the difference between a CHEEZE-IT and a lesbian?
One is a snack cracker, the other is a crack snacker!

mmmmm

[Empress Lainie]

Good to see this revived as a new thread.

[Panty Pervert]

What is the difference between kinky and perverted?
Kinky:use a feather
Perveted:use the whole chicken

NERF!

[x__orion]

Statistically, nine out of ten people enjoy gang rape.

Why was Shannon Matthews found unharmed? Even pedophiles have standards.

What did Jesus say to His 12 apostles as He was being nailed to the cross?
"Don't touch my fucking Easter eggs, I'll be back on Monday."

[Panty Pervert]

What's the difference between Jesus and an oil painting?
Takes only one nail to hang an oil painting.

Is it getting warm in here?

[Coconut]

Irish man catches his son snorting a line of charlie. He walks over, smack him aside the head and shouts,

'I see you doing that again ya dirty cunt, i'll rub ya nose in it!'

[Panty Pervert]

How do you tell if your brother is gay?
His willy tastes like shite!



ewww nasty!

[Coconut]

How can you tell your sisters on her period.

Your dads cock tastes like shite.

That is nasty. I now feel slightly sick. Panty look what you mde me do!!!

[pantysnatcher]

What do you get when you cross an onion and a donkey?

Nine times out of ten you get an onion with big ears.


The other time you get a great piece of ass that brings tears to your eyes!:D

[Panty Pervert]

Originally Posted by Coconut

...Panty look what you made me do!!!

Thats on you...NERF!




There are over 1000 women battered every day!!!
I still eat mine plain.

[Coconut]

Woman is giving birth and is doing the normal shouting and screaming!!! She shouts at her boyfriend,

'WHY YOU HAVE TO PUT IT IN THEIR YOU BASTARD!!!'

He replies cooly,

'If I remember rightly, I wanted to put it in your arse but you said it would be too painful. So dont blame me bitch!!!'

[tenguy]

Top Ten Reasons to Celebrate Easter


10. You absolutely love the movie, "The Ten Commandments".
9. You look really, really good in yellow.
8. You just went on a low cholesterol diet and didn't want to waste all those eggs in the fridge.
7. You figure any Holiday that starts with a "Good Friday" can't be all bad.
6. You love to bite the heads off chocolate bunnies.
5. It's a good time to check out your neighborhood church and not be noticed.
4. You have this bunny suit you love to wear, but are too insecure to wear it without a reason.
3. Even though you don't know what it is, you really like the sound of going to a "Passion Play."
2. You figured since Jesus went to all THAT trouble to make it to the first Easter, you'd give it a shot. 1. As a Christian you celebrate the resurrection every other day, why not Easter too?

[tenguy]

The Rules of Chocolate


If you get melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too slowly.
Chocolate covered raisins, cherries, orange slices and strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as many as you want.
The problem: How to get two pounds of chocolate home from the store in a hot car.
The solution: Eat it in the parking lot.
Diet tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal.
It'll take the edge off your appetite and you'll eat less.
A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Isn't that handy?
If you can't eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer. But if you can't eat all your chocolate, what's wrong with you?
If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights, and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves.
Money talks. Chocolate sings.
Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger.
Why is there no such organization as Chocoholics Anonymous?
Because no one wants to quit.
Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you'll get one thing done.

Chocolate is a health food. Chocolate is derived from cacao beans. Bean = vegetable. Sugar is derived either from sugar beets or cane, both vegetables. And, of course, the milk/cream is dairy. So eat more chocolate to meet the dietary requirements for daily vegetable and dairy intake.

HAPPY EASTER !!!

[tenguy]

This and the previous two jokes were stolen from

easterhumor.com



Signs the Easter Bunny is Nuts


10. Neighbors describing him as "a quiet loner."
9. Removed from a department store last December after screaming at Santa, "You're going to die up there, fat man!"
8. Can't stop washing his paws.
7. Colorful eggs now filled with Prozac.
6. Apartment walls covered with photos of Sharon Stone.
5. Met with Dr. Kevorkian about the possibility of a "suicide egg."
4. Rotting corpse of Energizer bunny recently discovered in his crawl space.
3. Won't come out of his compound in Waco, Texas.
2. He's hippity-hopped up on crack. 1. Keeps rubbing himself for good luck.

[lovin'it]

Q: What do you call a male missing 99% of his brain?

A: Castrated.

[DontTurnAway]

A little girl asked her mom, "What is a penis?
"Her mom said, "It's that thing between Daddy's legs."
The girl asked, "Well, what is a prick??"
Her mom answered, "That's the rest of Daddy."

[DontTurnAway]

3 Men were waiting to go to heaven. St Peter was at the gate and said, "However good you were to your wife that is the vehicle you will get in heaven".

The first guy comes up to the gate and says, "I never, ever cheated on my wife and I love her". So St. Peter gives him a Rolls Royce.

The next man comes up and says, "I cheated on my wife a little but I stilll love her." He gets a mustang and drives off into heaven.

The next guy came up and said, "I cheated on my wife alot". He gets a scooter.

Next day the guy that got the scooter was riding along and he saw the guy who owned the Rolls Royce crying.

He asked, "Why are you crying you have such a nice car?!" and the man sobbed, "My wife just went by on roller skates".

[Panty Pervert]

Originally Posted by DontTurnAway

A little girl asked her mom, "What is a penis?
"Her mom said, "It's that thing between Daddy's legs."
The girl asked, "Well, what is a prick??"
Her mom answered, "That's the rest of Daddy."

D T A , not directed at you

What is the difference between a pussy and a cunt?
A pussy is soft, warm, and beautiful, while a cunt is the thing that owns it!

[Horny Jester]

A Rooster and a were playing by the pool. All of the sudden the cat falls in. the rooster starts to laugh. the cat comes out and says "A wet pussy always makes a cock happy."

[Ilion]

The top 4 Chinese jokes:D

[Panty Pervert]

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Fucking classic, man!

[lei7272000]

what is the difference between George W. Bush and E. coli ?

E. coli has an exit strategy