Cookie

[ELaken-Palmer]

An advertisement?

"Cookie is girlhood personified and crucified."
....................................-Time Magazine*

Cookie

by Emerson Laken-Palmer

*Would say that if they ever read it

[Twistedsister]

1..
I just read chapter one, and i think the father is a doosh.
I also sense he is training her too. She will be subordinate and submissive when she grows older.
The brother i am sensing may wanna fuck her when he his puberty and his father may let him. or he is just protecting her from other people,as Daddy is a prick. He also may kill the father in his teens.

[Twistedsister]

2..
i have just finished chapter 2 and these are my thoughts.
This school hierachy seems to suffer from immoral issues, and shuolud be invsetigated.
What she has to put up with on and day to day basis, would drive movemnets like BA*(star) crazy. Anti-bullying group (BA*)
Her father must have done service to decipline her so harshly for so long.
Without Corey this 5-6 year old kid may have, runaway or killed herself.

My thoughts are when she is 14 and onwards, she will runaway become a street prostitute eventually to get by, maybe even be on drugs. She may even be made to do acts by her father in due time. I still think if Corey witness this, and is 15 and old, will belt the living fuck out of his fucked in the head father.
I thought my dad was harsh, sheesh.
1.

T

[snowleopard3200]

Originally Posted by Twistedsister

2..
i have just finished chapter 2 and these are my thoughts.
This school hierachy seems to suffer from immoral issues, and shuolud be invsetigated.
What she has to put up with on and day to day basis, would drive movemnets like BA*(star) crazy. Anti-bullying group (BA*)
Her father must have done service to decipline her so harshly for so long.
Without Corey this 5-6 year old kid may have, runaway or killed herself.

My thoughts are when she is 14 and onwards, she will runaway become a street prostitute eventually to get by, maybe even be on drugs. She may even be made to do acts by her father in due time. I still think if Corey witness this, and is 15 and old, will belt the living fuck out of his fucked in the head father.
I thought my dad was harsh, sheesh.
1.

T

TwistedSister: More than a few of us who follow ELP's story of Cooloe keep getting enraged at her father and most of the relations. Somehow I think Cookie will come out better by the end of the story; when you read the rest of the story posted so far you can see the character of forged steel she posesses.

Personally with her dad, there are times I get so enraged a pit full of hungry tigers and him dangling over it bound by a rope that is slowly being burned through by a candle would be too good a fate for him.

In my case it was an abusive and all too wicked uncle who did things to me is why the father is so...evil.

[ejls]

I've been a little behind on reading. After I read the birthday party chapter with Aunt Nell, I cried. You did not take Cookie out of character, you helped her evolve. We all change.

I've just finished the chapter where she is becoming a woman. You handled it very sensitively. This whole story has been a sensitive study of the not-so-nice side of human nature.

I've used this word before - brilliant. It's appropriate.

[ELaken-Palmer]

Originally Posted by ejls

I've been a little behind on reading. After I read the birthday party chapter with Aunt Nell, I cried. You did not take Cookie out of character, you helped her evolve. We all change.

I've just finished the chapter where she is becoming a woman. You handled it very sensitively. This whole story has been a sensitive study of the not-so-nice side of human nature.

I've used this word before - brilliant. It's appropriate.

Thanks so much, ejls. I always look forward to what you have to say.

[ELaken-Palmer]

I had hoped to handle the delicate subject matter, in that last chapter, tastefully and in keeping with the characters personalities. That one WAS written and re-written many times.

[Twistedsister]

Chapter three...thoughts. By 11 she was the house maid. Xmas, Thanksgiving and birthdays sucked for Cookz. Her father needs to beaten badly along with her cousins and uncles. Maybe had she shown emotion, it wouldn't have been as bad. By 11, she was nothing more then servant. I hope someone finds out and beats him up and then her Uncles, and then cousin Kate. Only person safe from a beat down or scolding, is Corey. If i was Cookie, i would runaway already. Police may find me, dressed in rags and finally do there fucking job. These are my thoughts on Chapters 1-3.

[kacey_s]

I have read all of the story that you have posted so far. I enjoyed reading it even though it is a extremely sad story.
I am sad to say the this type of child abuse is all too common.
Unlike the USA in my country beating a child as punishment is common and unless the child is severly injured as a result the authorities rarely interfere, sometimes not even then.
Before roughly the last 10yrs corporal punishment was accepted punishment in public schools.
I know what it is like to be abused by those that are suppose to protect you and I know what it is like to be resented by a parent for as my mother loves to say; me and my siblings were her bigest mistake.
So as someone who has lived a life close to the characters I have to say that a few adjustments should be made to her character.
No matter how much you love someone and hope they will one day love you in return there is only so much that a person can take until that love turns to anger and hate.

Cookie is way too accepting if she was uneducated or isolated it would be understandable but since she has others to compare her life to and is smart enough to relise the differences she would have developed negative emotions to others especially her father. No one is completely good there is negative emotions in everyone. In my openion the only thing missing in cookie are negative emotions. I am not saying she has to completely hate her father and the others, it is possible to angry,hateful, loving, caring and resentful of someone all at the same time.
Unlike most of my fellow countrymen I do not belive in beating children, so even though or perhaps because it is so common in my society I am extermely sympathetic of the triales cookie faced in her life.
I more than most am aware that these type of stories don't always have a happy ending but i hope this one does because like any good writer you have made me start thinking of the characters as if they real persons and have drawn me into the stroy.
Looking forward to the next chapter.

[Twistedsister]

I have read three chapters and read your comments and add my thoughts of both and this is what i come with.

Cookie is made to cook etc by her father, time for revenge as she is a smartie, she should lace his food with poison, like wise her cousins but warn Corey to play sick.
I think she will be sold at later date by her father to a brothel or pedo ring, or she will runaway and probably work in a brithel to make money until she can find her niesh in life.
Also i been told these stories are in the 50s-60s so most of todays law dont apply. DNA test and abuse was not heard of much back in those days.

Originally Posted by kacey_s

I have read all of the story that you have posted so far. I enjoyed reading it even though it is a extremely sad story.
I am sad to say the this type of child abuse is all too common.
Unlike the USA in my country beating a child as punishment is common and unless the child is severly injured as a result the authorities rarely interfere, sometimes not even then.
Before roughly the last 10yrs corporal punishment was accepted punishment in public schools.
I know what it is like to be abused by those that are suppose to protect you and I know what it is like to be resented by a parent for as my mother loves to say; me and my siblings were her bigest mistake.
So as someone who has lived a life close to the characters I have to say that a few adjustments should be made to her character.
No matter how much you love someone and hope they will one day love you in return there is only so much that a person can take until that love turns to anger and hate.

Cookie is way too accepting if she was uneducated or isolated it would be understandable but since she has others to compare her life to and is smart enough to relise the differences she would have developed negative emotions to others especially her father. No one is completely good there is negative emotions in everyone. In my openion the only thing missing in cookie are negative emotions. I am not saying she has to completely hate her father and the others, it is possible to angry,hateful, loving, caring and resentful of someone all at the same time.
Unlike most of my fellow countrymen I do not belive in beating children, so even though or perhaps because it is so common in my society I am extermely sympathetic of the triales cookie faced in her life.
I more than most am aware that these type of stories don't always have a happy ending but i hope this one does because like any good writer you have made me start thinking of the characters as if they real persons and have drawn me into the stroy.
Looking forward to the next chapter.

[SensualRobin]

I had already begun to read 'Cookie' before your PM, and I had struggled to read it through all the abuse the girl goes through. I went back to it just now at your request, and I have to tell you honestly that I don't enjoy it. Your writing is full of talent, and the fact that you can bring out the raw emotions in your reader should further be proof of that, but it hurts my heart to read.

Thank you for your kind words.

[Hornycountryboy]

Originally Posted by SensualRobin

I had already begun to read 'Cookie' before your PM, and I had struggled to read it through all the abuse the girl goes through. I went back to it just now at your request, and I have to tell you honestly that I don't enjoy it. Your writing is full of talent, and the fact that you can bring out the raw emotions in your reader should further be proof of that, but it hurts my heart to read.

Thank you for your kind words.

Robin that is exactly why I keep coming back to read the next chapter, that and the thought or hope that something good has to come out of her tough life.

[ELaken-Palmer]

Originally Posted by SensualRobin

I had already begun to read 'Cookie' before your PM, and I had struggled to read it through all the abuse the girl goes through. I went back to it just now at your request, and I have to tell you honestly that I don't enjoy it. Your writing is full of talent, and the fact that you can bring out the raw emotions in your reader should further be proof of that, but it hurts my heart to read.

Thank you for your kind words.

I could sense that you are a sensitive woman and that is why I wanted your thoughts on this story. Thank you.

I can also see, by your avatar, that I'd like to stick my face between your ass cheeks, hold on to your hips, and deeply sniff for about an hour and a half.

[SensualRobin]

Originally Posted by ELaken-Palmer

I could sense that you are a sensitive woman and that is why I wanted your thoughts on this story. Thank you.

I can also see, by your avatar, that I'd like to stick my face between your ass cheeks, hold on to your hips, and deeply sniff for about an hour and a half.

My avatar does not reflect my body in any shape or form. Thank you for the flirt, however.

Last night was particularly hard on me for reading a sad story. I'll come return and give you a more in-depth commentary when I am not biased! <3

[SensualRobin]

Originally Posted by Hornycountryboy

Robin that is exactly why I keep coming back to read the next chapter, that and the thought or hope that something good has to come out of her tough life.

In stories like that, I usually skim through the sad parts and just get to the silver lining. <3

[Hornycountryboy]

I like to think of stories as reading a movie, now its just me but I couldn't fast forward a movie so I wont do it while reading a story.

[ELaken-Palmer]

It is before all our times (silent movie days) but I see "Cookie" as partly "The Perils of Pauline" who was a poor gal who kept getting tied to railroad tracks and having her house taken away. Silent movie goers loved seeing the awful things happening to this lovely heroine. There is also an aspect of "Cinderella" to this story but it's no fairy tale.

[Twistedsister]

I have to summarise the story before making a decision as, i too think its too harsh a life. Sure child service were tough in the 50s and 60s but it seems like the times of Oliver Twist in the 1890s were children were slaves in mines and sweat shops and alike.
i find it really harsh and i couldn't read all chapters at a reading, one chapter at a time as it makes me both angry and upset.

It is well written though

[rockfordx]

Hehe

[snowleopard3200]

Originally Posted by Twistedsister

I have to summarise the story before making a decision as, i too think its too harsh a life. Sure child service were tough in the 50s and 60s but it seems like the times of Oliver Twist in the 1890s were children were slaves in mines and sweat shops and alike.
i find it really harsh and i couldn't read all chapters at a reading, one chapter at a time as it makes me both angry and upset.

It is well written though

Twisted Sister: How true on the last part of your post; ELP shows a true mastery of the art with how he gets us into rage, anger, swings of joy and hope, and a mystery woven into an enigma of what may yet be ahead.

That is why he is one of the best in my book.

[tuc_sac]

Such a deep story, i feel so bad for cookie and everything she's gone through. I was so happy for her, when she got to keep her mothers ring. I like how corey is becoming more active in the story, I can not wait until the next chapter.

[ELaken-Palmer]

Originally Posted by tuc_sac

Such a deep story, i feel so bad for cookie and everything she's gone through. I was so happy for her, when she got to keep her mothers ring. I like how corey is becoming more active in the story, I can not wait until the next chapter.

Thanks and wait no longer...

[ELaken-Palmer]

___
___
___
19. The horse bite
___
___
___
___The first day of school found Cookie starting out in Mr. Fay’s math class. He was a stocky, gruff-looking man with short, thinning, salt-and-pepper hair and (Cookie thought) menacing grey eyes under thick eyebrows.

___Her desk was in the first row and three seats down from the front. Kathy Grimes was in this class and sat one desk in front of her. John Madison was in this class too.

___“Okay,” the teacher said, writing his name on the board with a squeaky piece of chalk. “I’m your math teacher, Mr. Fay. We are going to have a great year together and get along just fine if you follow my rules. My rules are simple... I’m in charge and you’re not. Do what I tell you to do and we’ll have no trouble. Don’t do what I tell you and we’ll have big trouble... for you. You decide.”

___He stepped to the front of his desk now and his eyes flashed to each student as he said, “I am not going to take any crap from any of you and that’s how it’s gonna’ be. I know bullshit when I see it and I’m the biggest, meanest bull-shitter you’re ever gonna’ meet. I’ll tell you one thing right now... you can’t bullshit the bullshitter.”

___The students didn’t seem to like Mr. Fay’s authoritarian attitude and there was a low muttering in the room as he turned his large frame and walked back to the chair behind his desk.

___“Hey,” he said, hearing the grumbling, “I’m not such a bad guy... really. In fact, if you look up on the board, you’ll see an equation that I’ve written up there. Every year I tell my classes that, if any one of you thinks they can solve that equation, and actually goes up and does it, they’ll receive an A, in my class, for the entire year.”

___Cookie looked up at what he had written there and studied it, for a few moments, as he continued to speak. Then, making up her mind, her hand went up.

___“Excuse me?” Mr. Fay said, noticing her. “Do you dare to interrupt me when I’m speaking?”

___“I’m sorry, sir,” she told him. “It’s just that I think I can solve that equation for you.”

___“And just who are you?”

___“Cookie Mullins, sir.”

___Mr. Fay’s eyes seemed to widen and he smiled now but it was more of a sneer, showing his two uneven rows of brownish teeth. “Ah. Miss Mullins. I’ve heard about you. In fact I requested to have you in my class. I was wondering when we’d have an encounter and here it is already. Sure,” he said to her, “you may go up there and solve that equation, in front of the whole class, for me... if you can.”

___Cookie, in her white blouse and blue-plaid skirt, stood and walked to the blackboard where she picked up a piece of chalk and just looked up at the equation for almost a full minute.

___“Well?” Mr. Fay barked. “I don’t see you doing anything. Can you solve it, or not?”

___After a few moments more, Cookie looked to him and said, “No, sir. I can’t solve this.”

___Mr. Fay grinned widely at her and folded his hands together. “I didn’t think so. Nobody of your grade level has ever solved it. Now go sit down and shut up.”

___“There is no solving this, Mr. Fay,” Cookie spoke up, in spite of that fact that she had been dismissed.

___“And just why, pray tell, is that?”

___“Because you’ve written it wrong, sir, see?” And cookie took the eraser and removed an m from above a line and substituted a d for it. “You’ve written this as matter squared but it’s supposed to be distance over matter squared. If you write the equation correctly...” and she made the corrections on the board, for him, as she spoke, “...the answer to your equation is F.”

___Mr. Fay just stood there for many long moments, just staring at her with his mouth open and nothing coming out. There were a few snickers from the class and then some actual laughter before he finally said, in a voice brimming with extreme, restrained anger, “Put the chalk down and go to your seat, Miss Mullins.”

___“Yes, sir,” she said, setting the chalk back on the ledge and then returning to her desk where she smoothed her skirt to the backs of her thighs as she sat in her chair.

___Mr. Fay seemed to just stew and simmer for a time more before he swallowed hard and walked slowly over to stand behind Cookie’s seat and then he placed his hands softly to her shoulders and combed her soft, straw-blonde hair, with his fingers, for a moment.

___“This, class, is a case of someone who thinks they’ve put one over on feeble old Mr. Fay and made a chump out of him. Miss Mullins here has messed with the bull but she’s going to find that, when you mess with the bull, you get the horns.”

___“I’m sorry, Mr. Fay,” Cookie said from her seat, feeling his large hands tighten on her shoulders. “You said that...”

___“Don’t tell me what I said,” he told her, “I’ll tell you what I said.”

___And Cookie now felt his strong fingers grip her shoulder muscles, at either side of her neck, and start to squeeze her there tightly.

___“Does that hurt, Miss Mullins?” he asked her calmly.

___“Yes,” she said as she hunched a bit, in her chair, from the pain.

___“Good. This is the horse bite,” he explained, looking around the room at the others in the class, “and nobody wants the horse bite.”

___He squeezed harder now, his hands like vices at either side of her neck, causing Cookie to wiggle in her chair from the excruciating stinging sensation at her shoulders.

___“Just cry out or scream when this hurts too much,” he told her, “and the horse will stop biting and the pain will stop.”

___“Oh, she won’t scream,” John Madison said, matter-of-factly, from two rows over.

___Mr. Fay’s cold eyes darted over to him. “What’s that you say?”

___“I’ve seen teachers do a lot worse to her, over the years, and she never lets out so much as a whimper or cries no matter what you do to her.”

___“Oh, really?” Mr. Fay replied. “I see. Defiant, is she? I can sure break her of that.”

___And he gripped her burning shoulder muscles even tighter, digging his fingertips into her tender shoulders and causing the searing pain to run right down her back and up through her head as the vice tightened even more on her and her eyes and lips clamped tightly closed in response.

___“Yell out and it will stop,” he assured her, close to her ear now but, although the breath was catching in her throat, Cookie continued to make no sound at all.

___“Yell, you defiant little bitch,” he shouted down at her now as he squeezed her upper trapezius muscles with all the might that he possessed.

___But Cookie continued to emit hardly a sound through the blinding blur of the pain and the continued tightening of Mr. Fay’s brutal vice-like grip on her.

___“Eee-yew,” Kathy Grimes suddenly wined as, looking at the scene at the desk behind her, she saw Cookie’s blue eyes roll upwards, as if looking into her skull, and her mouth lolled open and her neck muscles contorted and her head tilted back and then her whole body started to violently convulse in her chair before all of Cookie’s movements abruptly stopped and she slumped in her chair. Sensing that she had gone limp on him, Mr. Fay let go of her shoulders and Cookie collapsed forward, her head hitting the desktop with a sound like that of a ripened melon impacting on a hard, wooden counter.




___When Cookie awoke, she was again laying on the cot in the small, pleasant yellow-painted room with Miss Fleming, the school nurse, standing above her and holding a little bottle of smelling salts in her hand.

___“Welcome back, Cookie,” Miss Fleming smiled as she looked down in concern at her woozy patient. “It looks like you fainted on us again.”

___“I’m sorry,” Cookie said timidly, not knowing what to say but feeling that an apology was as good to say as anything.

___“Can you sit up?” Miss Fleming asked and Cookie, with the nurse’s help, struggled to a sitting position, feeling an ache in her head and a dull pain still throbbing in both of her shoulders.

___“How did I get here?” Cookie inquired, holding her hand to her head as she turned, on the cot and placed her feet to the floor.

___“They called the janitor and he carried you here.”

___“Oh.”

___“Care to tell me what happened to you this time?”

___“I was at my desk and... I guess I just felt faint.”

___“Hmm,” Miss Fleming muttered. “I’ve heard stories about your Mr. Fay. I’ve heard that he had to transfer here from the Detroit Public Schools because they found his teaching methods to be a bit odd and there were reports of him using unnecessary and brutal discipline on his students. I wish that you weren’t in his class, Cookie. But I’m just the school nurse and I have no say in the matter.”

___She put her hand on Cookie’s, over her lap, and squeezed it, looking directly into her pale-blue eyes. “How are you feeling now?”

___Cookie took stock of herself and replied, “Better.”

___Miss Fleming seemed to look Cookie up and down now and she said, “Can I ask you something, kiddo?”

___“Sure, Miss Fleming.”

___“I can see that you’ve developed into a very lovely young lady, Cookie, but I notice that you’re not wearing a bra right now and that you never seem to be wearing one when I’ve seen you in the hallways. That might not be a problem but for the fact that the outline of your... Well, the tips of your breasts are very noticeable through your blouses. Hasn’t your mother talked to you about this?”

___“Oh, I have no mother, Miss Fleming. She died when I was born.”

___“I’m sorry to hear that, honey,” Miss Fleming said, squeezing her hand tighter. “There’s no other women at your house? Nobody to advise you?”

___“It’s just my father and my brother and I.”

___“I see. Well, hasn’t your father broached the subject of a bra for you?”

___Cookie didn’t like the questions again. She could just see trouble, for her, if Miss Fleming tried to get involved in these matters.

___“He hasn’t. But I’ll try and wear sweaters, more often, over my blouses. It’s just been so hot lately...”

___“Well,” Miss Fleming said, “I’ll just have to have a talk with him about a bra for you.”

___“Oh, no, Miss Fleming,” Cookie cried out. “Please don’t do that!”

___“Cookie,” the nurse said calmingly to her, “there’s no need to be so agitated about it. I have to talk to him. Your welfare is part of my job.”

___“It’s just that he gets... he doesn’t understand... girlish things.”

___“Men!” Miss Fleming harrumphed. “I know what you’re saying, kiddo. But he has to overcome his embarrassment and face his parental responsibilities toward you.”

___“Please, Miss Fleming,” Cookie begged again, taking the nurse’s hand in both of hers and holding it to her chest as she pleaded, “please don’t get involved in this. Please! Please don’t!”

___“Alright,” the woman said now, seeing the extreme anxiety displayed in Cookie’s tearing eyes. “Calm down, honey. I don’t understand why you’re getting so worked up. But I’ll be tactful with him, I promise. Just leave it to me. I’m here to help you, Cookie. Trust me.”

[belizelarry]

I have gritted my teeth, cried, cussed, yelled, my way through these chapters. Now I am in such a state, I am not sure whether to throw my computer at the wall or go looking for Mr. Fay just to relieve some tension. I am going to take Snowleopard and Hornycountryboy with me and we will show him what a real horse bite feels like. Then add all the rabid animals, burning oil, and a few matches to just play games for a while.
There, now I feel a little better. Except now the kind hearted nurse is unknowingly going to make it worse.
ELP. I have come to think that you are not only a great writer, but the meanest , most sadistic, cruel, malicious minded person I have met. Ha Ha. You write the most emotional, heartrending story I ever read. I am afraid to see whats next.

[Hornycountryboy]

Well ELP just when you have me thinking she was going to get an A you again pull the rug out from under my feet. At least she ended up with someone who is actually caring and trying to help her, but I don't see good things for Cookie if the nurse talks to her dad.

[belizelarry]

I hope you took that with the sense of humor intended. Good job my friend. I know this comes from your heart. And as you have said from your gut.

[ELaken-Palmer]

I know what you're saying, Larry, but this is only partly fantasy. I was actually in Mr. Fay's math class, in 8th grade, and I was given the horse bite more than once. I assure you that he was a real person and that he was pretty-much as I described him here.

[belizelarry]

ELP. In college, I had an economics professor like that. The first day of class he proudly proclaimed that he got $25,000 a year for teaching this one class, and he didn't care if we learned or not. He belittled and made fun of anyone who couldn't quickly answer his complicated and mumbled questions. I went two weeks and transferred to a different class along with about half the class. I had a math teacher that to this day I owe everything I know about math to him. greatest teacher I ever had. Some good and some bad. Just like real life.

[ELaken-Palmer]

Originally Posted by belizelarry

ELP. In college, I had an economics professor like that. The first day of class he proudly proclaimed that he got $25,000 a year for teaching this one class, and he didn't care if we learned or not. He belittled and made fun of anyone who couldn't quickly answer his complicated and mumbled questions. I went two weeks and transferred to a different class along with about half the class. I had a math teacher that to this day I owe everything I know about math to him. greatest teacher I ever had. Some good and some bad. Just like real life.

All the degenerate teachers seem to have taught at my schools which partly led to my fantasies about Cookie and her life's trials and how she would have handled them.

[snowleopard3200]

I am glad to see Miss Flemming is trying to help Cookie out in this case; and hopefully can be discreet enough with her dad to make a difference. This brings up the point in that is her mysterious benefactor going to send another bunch of clothing; this time with the appropriate undergarments?

In the case of the horse bite teacher; right now I rate him with Cookies dad as to what I would do to him.

And yes I have had a few teachers such as he; one of them had the simple way of teaching discipline was to grip you by the throat and see how long you would take to beg for mercy or choke.

Honestly ELP, sometimes the life Cookie led or the beasts she has to contend with reminds me of the dragons I danced with as a kid.

One thing I find of interest here is that Cookie discovered the equation could not be solved the way it was displayed; and then gave the correct one easy enough - this shows a sharp accumen for mathmatics, knowledge and a high IQ mixed into one.

Amazing that with one short sequence you have revealed another miracle of Cookie.

Her story is like a mystery on many levels; it takes time to sift each one out from behind the tortures pressed onto her by most of the world.

Again - well written.

[Versed]

Originally Posted by belizelarry

I have gritted my teeth, cried, cussed, yelled, my way through these chapters. Now I am in such a state, I am not sure whether to throw my computer at the wall or go looking for Mr. Fay just to relieve some tension. I am going to take Snowleopard and Hornycountryboy with me and we will show him what a real horse bite feels like. Then add all the rabid animals, burning oil, and a few matches to just play games for a while.
There, now I feel a little better. Except now the kind hearted nurse is unknowingly going to make it worse.
ELP. I have come to think that you are not only a great writer, but the meanest , most sadistic, cruel, malicious minded person I have met. Ha Ha. You write the most emotional, heartrending story I ever read. I am afraid to see whats next.

I'm coming with you. We'll kick his ass back to last Thursday.
I'm hoping that the nurse won't completely screw Cookie's life over, because I like her. She's smart..

Awaiting the next chapter, ELP! :3

[Hornycountryboy]

Originally Posted by belizelarry

I have gritted my teeth, cried, cussed, yelled, my way through these chapters. Now I am in such a state, I am not sure whether to throw my computer at the wall or go looking for Mr. Fay just to relieve some tension. I am going to take Snowleopard and Hornycountryboy with me and we will show him what a real horse bite feels like. Then add all the rabid animals, burning oil, and a few matches to just play games for a while.
There, now I feel a little better. Except now the kind hearted nurse is unknowingly going to make it worse.
ELP. I have come to think that you are not only a great writer, but the meanest , most sadistic, cruel, malicious minded person I have met. Ha Ha. You write the most emotional, heartrending story I ever read. I am afraid to see whats next.

Originally Posted by Versed

I'm coming with you. We'll kick his ass back to last Thursday.
I'm hoping that the nurse won't completely screw Cookie's life over, because I like her. She's smart..

Awaiting the next chapter, ELP! :3

I will grab my blow torch and see if we can make him squeal like the pig that he is.

[Versed]

I'll call you Countryboy ^^; And yes! We'll do that! To her cousin too, Rawr..

As for chapters 17 and 18 which I somehow neglected to comment on, I am happy that Corey's showing her a little more niceness. As a brother should. I think he's caring for her, even though he hasn't said anything to his father about it.. the fact that she does everything for them and he doesn't seem to notice bothers me. Does he assume that, because he grew up that way, that it should always be like that in a household? Is that the reason he hasn't had a quarrel with her duties?

Also.. oh noes. Poor Cookie D:
Maybe a mood swing will hit and she'll lash out >:D Wait no, that's a bad thing. Never mind.

This is indeed a study in psychology. XD

Masterful work. My emotions are screwed. ;_;

[Hornycountryboy]

I will wait by the phone

[snowleopard3200]

HCB - I will join your force as well; though personally I could think of one very enjoyable fate for Mr Fay - give him to Hannible Lectre as a dinner guest.

[Twistedsister]

I think i'll wait some time before i will read more, it brings back bad memories of torture i had to endure when i was a street kid some 10 years ago. The brutality and rape was bad enough but horse bite i never had to content with but it made me think back when i 14-15 years old, my dark time i'll wait a bit hoping she leaves here father or gets a boyfriend that will look after her and take care of the assholes in her life :::::::::

[snowleopard3200]

Originally Posted by Versed

I'll call you Countryboy ^^; And yes! We'll do that! To her cousin too, Rawr..

As for chapters 17 and 18 which I somehow neglected to comment on, I am happy that Corey's showing her a little more niceness. As a brother should. I think he's caring for her, even though he hasn't said anything to his father about it.. the fact that she does everything for them and he doesn't seem to notice bothers me. Does he assume that, because he grew up that way, that it should always be like that in a household? Is that the reason he hasn't had a quarrel with her duties?

Also.. oh noes. Poor Cookie D:
Maybe a mood swing will hit and she'll lash out >:D Wait no, that's a bad thing. Never mind.

This is indeed a study in psychology. XD

Masterful work. My emotions are screwed. ;_;

In regards to Cory consider this much; maybe his father has some kind of hold on him as well. A parent who abuses kids like he does with Cookie is capable of forging emotional rings of steel that cannot easily be broken.

Indeed, ELP shows his mastery in this story.

[Hornycountryboy]

I liked what Hannibal did to that cop in "Hannibal" where he slices his gut then pushes him out the window with a rope tied around his neck and his insides come splashing down as the rope jerks to a stop. That could be Mr. Fay's fate if he were to have dinner with Hannibal.

[Versed]

Alright, I've got our plan. The deer is a representation of Cookie's father.
Leopard, you will be in charge of taking the rear.
Mr. countryboy will be up close, distracting him while I (right in the middle) and leopard follow up with an attack. This way we can properly bring him down. And larry, I apologize. You were in the picture but you were lagging a bit too far behind :I You will get to tear him apart just the same though. <3



LET'S DO THIS

[belizelarry]

Now I did it. My wife thinks I am crazy. She has listened to me "OOH" and "AWW" through the romantic stories like 'A KIND STRANGER', laugh hysterically through the crazy and off the wall "THE PRINCESS AND THE BLACKSMITH", drool and get excited with Fix'm's adventure "FULL CIRCLE". But with ELP's story, "Cookie", she has heard me cussing and yelling at my computer, sometimes with tears in my eyes. That is not so bad. Yesterday, she is listening to me cackle and rub my hands together as I am posting my ideas. She asks what I am doing. I explain very seriously, that I am getting some friends together and go torture and maim a few bad people. She asks "Who". I intelligently answer "Someone who doesn't exist." "Que?" (She does not speak english). How do I convince her I don't need a doctor? See what your story has done to all of us? ELP, you should be proud. We are now a pack of wolves chasing an Elk through the snow. How did you guys explain yourselves? Does Hannibal have room for one more in his cell?

[snowleopard3200]

Originally Posted by belizelarry

Now I did it. My wife thinks I am crazy. She has listened to me "OOH" and "AWW" through the romantic stories like 'A KIND STRANGER', laugh hysterically through the crazy and off the wall "THE PRINCESS AND THE BLACKSMITH", drool and get excited with Fix'm's adventure "FULL CIRCLE". But with ELP's story, "Cookie", she has heard me cussing and yelling at my computer, sometimes with tears in my eyes. That is not so bad. Yesterday, she is listening to me cackle and rub my hands together as I am posting my ideas. She asks what I am doing. I explain very seriously, that I am getting some friends together and go torture and maim a few bad people. She asks "Who". I intelligently answer "Someone who doesn't exist." "Que?" (She does not speak english). How do I convince her I don't need a doctor? See what your story has done to all of us? ELP, you should be proud. We are now a pack of wolves chasing an Elk through the snow. How did you guys explain yourselves? Does Hannibal have room for one more in his cell?

How to explain the matter to your wife?

"Estoy una hombre, y todos hombres estan muchos locos."
"I am a man, and all men are very crazy."

Apologies for my lousy spanish, I am still attempting to learn that beauty of a language since I first translated one short poem.

As for Dr Hannible; just ask him for a dinner invitation, I'm sure he will greet anyone with a smile. (Note, very bad joke I admit it.)

[ELaken-Palmer]

Let's not debate the awful things we would do to the people who harm her but rather what we would do for her.

I should tell you. As a boy, I sat a few rows over from Cookie in all of her classes at school, wishing that I could go over and take her in my arms and hold her to me and kiss her pretty face and tell her I loved her. But I knew that the others in the class would gang up on me if I did (the guys would laugh at me for liking such a skank and the girls would shun me even more than they already did). The teacher would have grabbed me by my collar and dragged me to the office for expulsion. Plus a girl as smart and as pretty as Cookie would have rejected me anyway. I was no prize. So I just sat across the room and looked lovingly and sadly over at her as Mr. Fay squeezed her shoulders and she squirmed around in her chair. I think I even saw a little of her bare upper thigh as she twisted her legs in her short skirt, trying to deal with the pain he was inflicting but I averted my eyes. Then she passed out and the janitor came and got her, taking her up in his arms and carrying her out to somewhere. That lucky bastard got to hold her.

Many were the days that I followed her home from a distance back. She lived one street over from me in a nice but modest house. She always went in but never came back out to hang around outside where I might walk over and talk to her. Her brother was a big guy anyway and I was sure that he would beat me up if he saw me following her so I avoided him.

One time, after standing near the house until her dad came home, I saw him go in and I walked past. I could hear some kind of ruckus going on in the house as I passed by. I thought I heard someone yelling and loud slapping sounds and maybe her brother's voice saying, "Dad, don't hit her again."

I wanted to maybe tell my parents about all this and I actually kinda did once but they told me, "Son, that's their business and we don't want any trouble with the neighbors. Let's mind our own business."

No, all I could do, when I was 13, was fantasize about my sweet, pretty Cookie and watch her, waiting to someday have the ability to tell her story and wondering if anyone would believe it.

[belizelarry]

OK. Confession time. True facts. I grew up like Cory. Our stepfather was raping and abusung my little sister since she was very young. I found out during one of his drunken rages. I was just finishing high school and was still living at home. One night he tried to grab and haul off my other little sister. I snapped and jumped up and started hitting him. He was a very big man and had tried to intimidate all of us. He was so drunk and enraged he did not go down. I hit him so hard I broke two knuckles. I kept at him because I was not going to let him do any more to my sisters. Finally he let go of her hair and fell to his knees. I took my Mom and my sisters out of the house and spent the night in a park . That was my last night I stayed in the same house with my family. My sister hated that man until the day he died. We did not go to his funeral. I would gladly attack any one who abuses young children, boys or girls. Sorry I can't do any thing for Cookie. But the feelings are there. My sister did come out stronger and she is still my best friend almost 50 years later.

[snowleopard3200]

ELP - my apologies about my rants of Cookies father and what I honestly would love to do to him; apperantly many of us have suffered such as she (both the real one you sat near and the one of the story), and seek to do something to aid her.

Children are the most precious and the most vulnerable of treasures for anyone; to see them abused and stand by while doing nothing...

Based on what you said about the Cookie you sat near, you did try to make a difference in the only way you could then...via your parents.

The story is a master work of writing in my book; you make us love and hate, turn and burn, show mysteries and insights of character that make us all have to ask...what would we do...

Awaiting the next chapter with anxious anticipation.

Hats off to you ELP, wonderful work.

[ELaken-Palmer]

Originally Posted by snowleopard3200

ELP - my apologies about my rants of Cookies father and what I honestly would love to do to him; apperantly many of us have suffered such as she (both the real one you sat near and the one of the story), and seek to do something to aid her.

Children are the most precious and the most vulnerable of treasures for anyone; to see them abused and stand by while doing nothing...

Based on what you said about the Cookie you sat near, you did try to make a difference in the only way you could then...via your parents.

The story is a master work of writing in my book; you make us love and hate, turn and burn, show mysteries and insights of character that make us all have to ask...what would we do...

Awaiting the next chapter with anxious anticipation.

Hats off to you ELP, wonderful work.

Larry and snowleopard, it was all a fantasy... a daydream from the mind of a lovelorn, horny schoolboy. Cookie was never a real girl but rather a composite of the many unattainable girls I saw each and every day... all creatures of delicate, alluring beauty that I wanted, so much, to either love, touch, fuck or make suffer. I could do none of those things except for in my mind, at night, in the dark, before I fell asleep.

[Jackskellington1]

This story is tough to read indeed but it's something that keeps you wanting to read more. Eagerly waiting for cookie to get a friend beside the nurse.

[belizelarry]

ELP. We all know that this story is a fantasy. That is why is feels so strange for us as grown men to come up with all the perverted ideas of revenge and torture to someone who doesnt exist. Snowleopard has mentioned his dragons, I told what I had to see growing up, you mentioned the abuse from teachers. We all have something personal to relate to in this story. That is what you as a magnificent writer has brought out. Others who have posted, have expressed the difficulty reading this. You have created the most emotional, heartwrenching, story any one could write. We can't save Cookie, but we can stand up and fight back against our own demons and anybody else who chooses abuse as a way of control. If your only legacy is to start a tidal wave against this abuse, you suceeded. the Cookies of the world would be proud.

[ELaken-Palmer]

___
___
___
20. The little papers
___
___
___

___When Cookie was deemed recovered by Nurse Fleming, she was given a hall pass and sent back to math class. However the class-ending bell had rung as she made it back to the room so Cookie merely collected her books, from her desk, and went to her next class which was history.

___Mr. Boswell was a short, paunchy man in black, thick-frame glasses. Although he didn’t look that old, he only had brownish-graying hair around the circumference of his bald head. He wore a white, short-sleeve shirt and baggy, brown trousers that were held up (around his protruding belly) by thick red suspenders. Standing with his hairy arms to his sides, he looked like Tweedle-dee from ‘Alice In Wonderland’.

___He had made a seating chart for his class and handed each student a copy as they came into the room.

___Cookie’s desk was in the front row, just to the right of Mr. Boswell’s large desk.

___Looking around, she saw that Kathy Grimes sat to her left and Nancy Martin to the left beyond her. An attractive girl she knew as Kelly Greene sat to Cookie’s right and Gwen Butsell, a heavy girl with thick-thighs and glasses with Coke-bottle lenses, to the right of her. In fact, the whole front row of desks were occupied by girls.

___As everyone became settled and the bell rang to announce the start of second hour, Mr. Boswell stood before his desk and introduced himself while, the whole time, his eyes scanned from student to student around the room.

___In mid sentence he stopped and looked back to the fourth row and asked pretty, red-haired Stacy Connelly, who was wearing an above the knee length, flower-print dress, to change seat locations with Gwen Butsell, in the front row, and informed the both of them that this would be a permanent seating assignment change.

___After the girls had traded places, Mr. Boswell continued his introduction, walking slowly, back and forth, at the front of the room, as he spoke.

___“This class will be less about history and more about current events,” he told the students. “The struggle of the negro race, in the South, is the greatest struggle this country has ever faced and I am deeply committed to that struggle as each and every one of you should be...”

___As Mr. Boswell talked and paced, he kept stopping and bending to pick up little scraps of paper that were scattered in seemingly random places across the front of the classroom floor.

___“Our country was founded on the fact that ALL people were created equal,” he said, “and the blatant discrimination against the negro, in the South, runs totally counter to the principals that our nation was founded on.”

___As he stopped and bent again, to pick up a scrap of paper in front of where Kelly Greene was sitting, Cookie noticed that he was looking under her desk as if he were trying to see something there.

___Kelly didn’t seem to notice and Mr. Boswell stood upright and continued, “It is a dirty shame that officials in the South continue to look the other way as innocent negroes are beaten and tortured and lynched for simply seeking their due civil rights...”

___And now Mr. Boswell was in front of Stacy Connelly’s desk and he bent again for another scrap of paper and hardly hid the fact that he wasn’t even looking at the floor, he was looking directly under Stacy’s desk and, being that her knees were slightly parted, he spent a good deal of time bent and looking.

___Cookie even noticed Kathy Grimes reach over and nudge Nancy and point the scene out to her and both girl’s giggled quietly, to each other, as he now stood upright and continued talking.

___“I want us all to be civil rights activists... every single one of us,” he said as he came to just in front of Cookie’s desk and stopped. “Because if any one of us is oppressed and not free,” and he bent now for a scrap of paper, on the floor in front of her, “then all of us are oppressed and not free.”

___Cookie reached down to smooth her plaid skirt to the sides of her thighs and she put her knees together and placed her hand over them as she watched him looking under her desk.

___Mr. Boswell seemed to glance a look of disapproval, up at her reddened face, as he then stood and placed the little scrap of paper, he had collected, in his pocket and continued with his lecture.

___“None of you privileged, suburban, white kids here are free as long as poor, suffering, hungry black kids exist in the South,” he said, as he walked to in front of Kathy’s seat and bent for a shard of paper there.

___Cookie and Nancy both watched him as Mr. Boswell looked under Kathy’s desk toward her exposed knees and the hem of the white skirt that she was wearing with her light-pink, knit sweater. Kathy, who was loudly chewing her gum and looking back at him with a sweet, angelic smile on her freckled face, abruptly parted her legs so that each of her knees were at opposite sides of her chair and Mr. Boswell’s eyes went wide as dinner-plates and he seemed to inhale whatever the sight was before him.

___“C-c-colored people,” he stuttered now, still bent and looking under Kathy’s desk, “should be the number one priority of every one of you... as it is of me and all the other members of the N double-A CP.” And he slowly closed his eyes, as if to etch the sight, he was seeing, into his mind, and then he stood, quickly turning his back on the class, adjusting something at the front of his trousers and walking stiffly to stand behind his desk.

___Crossing her legs modestly now, Kathy turned to Nancy and the two girls smiled at each other and then quietly giggled.



___Cookie’s next hour class was reading which took place in room 8 next to the school’s library. The teacher was Mr. Grant who was an older man with unkempt white hair and wire rimmed reading glasses that he wore low on his nose. Students were to check out library books, read them and write reports on the content of each one. Cookie loved to read and checked out three books and was half-way through her first book report before the hour ended.

___Lunch followed with Cookie, as usual, eating her chicken salad sandwich in the library before it was time for fourth hour Science class.

___The science classroom was divided with desks at the front, facing the teacher’s big desk and black-topped lab tables, at the back, with beakers and tubes and Bunson burners on them.

___Mr. Dean was a young teacher with Dick Clarkish good looks. He had short, dark hair and bright, blue eyes and a charming, clean-white-teeth smile. He wore a nice, dark suit with a yellow, plaid vest and a blue, knit tie and he had a shine on his loafer shoes.

___Cookie took a seat in the second row and again had Kathy Grimes sitting at the desk beside her and a girl named Linda Johnson to her left.

___“Welcome to forth hour Science,” Mr. Dean smiled and said as the bell rang. “We’re going to do some interesting things and have some fun together this year. You all seem like a bright and cheerful group of students and I like that. Bright and cheerful people are the most fun to work with and I think I’m going to enjoy working with all of you.”

___Cookie right away liked his attitude, appearance and demeanor. He seemed, to her, like a vast improvement over Mr. Fay, Mr. Boswell and old Mr. Grant. She really felt as if she would enjoy this class.

___Mr. Dean gave the students an overview of what they would be studying this year and then asked them to open their textbooks and look at chapter thirteen and take notes on the table of elements.

___Looking down at the chapter ‘Periodic Table Of The Elements’, Cookie felt a nudge from Kathy beside her.

___“What?” she whispered, not looking from the page.

___“Got a pen I can use, Mullins?”

___Cookie reached down into her book bag and handed Kathy an old, clear-plastic Bic pen.

___It was quiet as Cookie read, for a time, and then Kathy said, in a low whisper, “I noticed that you didn’t let Mr. Boswell have a look up your skirt this morning.”

___Cookie didn’t comment.

___“He thinks nobody's on to him but all the girls know about his little scraps of paper - the perv,” Kathy continued in a hushed voice. “Plus he puts us all in the front where he can see. My sister had him two years ago and she told me that all you have to do is give him a little show, when he sits at his desk, and you’ll pass his class easy. You think I’m some kind of skank, because I let him see up there, don’t you?”

___Cookie remained silent.

___“You don’t have to say anything. I know you do, you bitch,” Kathy whispered now. “You’re not no angel, Mullins. You know what I’m talking about. I’ve heard things about you letting guys.”

___Cookie simply had nothing to say to her and didn’t want to attract any negative attention, from Mr. Dean, by talking while she was supposed to be reading and taking notes. She really wished that Kathy hadn’t chosen a seat beside her.

___“I thought it would be funny to give that nigger-lover a cheap thrill,” Kathy went on regardless. “I think I might have made him cream his pants.”

___“Please,” Cookie whispered back to her now, “I just want to read this.”

___“Oh. Yeah. Me too,” Kathy said, and she looked down at her book, reading as she idly gnawed on and sucked at the end of the pen that she now held between the fingers of her open hand.

___Cookie was distracted by the sucking sounds, coming from beside her, as she tried to read her own book and take notes. Kathy Grimes could be so irritating.

___Looking up at Mr. Dean, to see if the noise was bothering him, she saw that he was just viewing the room from the seat behind his desk. He seemed content that his students, for the most part, were reading their books quietly, as he had requested, and he didn’t seem to be paying any attention to Kathy at all.

___That’s when Kathy suddenly gasped loudly and emitted a pitiful chocking sound, beside her, and Cookie looked over to see her getting up quickly from her seat with her eyes wide and her hands wagging in panic out to her sides. Ink was flowing out of her open, dark-blue mouth and dripping down her freckled chin and onto the bodice of her pretty, pink sweater.

___Kathy put one of her hands over her mouth and, eyes still wide in distress, ran quickly across the room and out the open door as the whole class gasped and chuckled and watched her go.

___Mr. Dean just watched her too and then, after she had gone, he smiled at his roomful of eighth-graders and said, “She should have known that, if she kept sucking on that thing, it would cum for her sooner or later.”

___The class totally broke up now and laughed long and loudly at Mr. Dean’s dry observation.

___Cookie didn’t join in the laughter. She really didn’t understand the joke and she felt strangely sorry for Kathy, knowing (as she did) that it’s impossible to get dark-blue ink out of a pink knit sweater.

[Twistedsister]

ELP.
I liked this chapter (20) better then the recent ones as Cookie is getting older and some teachers aren't all BDSM mutha fuckrs. And someone else was punished, although its only blue ink. Eventually Cookz will learn the joke. I am starting see parts of me in Cookie, as secondary school sucked for me too, but it was fellow students and the odd teacher making it hard for me, plus home life, Cookie is in year 8, so year 9 is were i had real dramas and left part way thru the year 9 and by years in was on the straight.
It almost seems similar as idk, what happens to Cookie in year 9 but i't could be down the same track.
well written Boss

[Twistedsister]

ELP>
On Chapter 19 the Nurse was going to pay Cookie's dad a visit about bras, what became of that?