Quotable Quotes from XNXX posters

[ShakeZula]

So this here little thread is for quoting funny or interesting things people have said on the forum. It can be from any other section, it don't matter, just something that made you laugh or nod your head or just something you want to share with everyone else.

Sadly I can't start us off with anyone, but I'll be looking.

-S-

[ShakeZula]

Found one. From Caffeine in the Drunk thread.

Originally Posted by Caffeine

By the way. If I don't get some fucking pussy tonight, I'm totally fucking jerking off.

-S-

[stumbler]

Caffeine is going to do well on this thread

"You are getting crazier all the time. If I was ever at your house I would so TOTALLY not drink your kool-aid."

"A hopelessly derailed thread is a dead topic."

[stumbler]

They'd do better, with me at least, if they were a little more creative, a little more articulate.

For example, instead of "I'd luv 2 fuck u", they could say:

"Kimi, you're a sexual goddess and I'd give anything to lick every square millimeter of your gorgeous, sensuous body, and then savagely penetrate every orifice of it with my throbbing, uncircumcized, rock-hard cock, flooding you with endless spurts of my gushing cum."

Kimiko's helpful hints on better PMs

[chunky]

Can't resist this......sorry Joey......
On the ...'How did you find XNXX' thread

Originally Posted by Joey451

I was browsing the internet.

[stumbler]

And I like it around here enough not to leave.(But)

To quote the great Harvey Keitel in Pulp Fiction, "Well, let's not start sucking each other's dicks quite yet."

Caffeine

[chunky]

From the thread on 'Anal Stimulation'

Originally Posted by spanky2007
that type of activity is very, very, very GAY. don't fool yourself, ok? If you are not gay then what you are attempting to do might very well lead you toward more "gay" activities, and I know you don't want that. Or do you???

.......this cannot be serious...but it's funny!!:-D

[Caffeine]

Me once and everybody else many other times:

Originally Posted by Everybody!

Jump up and down and point at your dick.

[Caffeine]

...great thread, by the way.

[ShakeZula]

Originally Posted by pookey227

*CYBER SMACK*


DONT YOU EVER
*SMACK*

BRING UP
*SMACK*


AN OLD POST LIKE THIS
*SMACK*

AGAIN!

I thought this was funny. You really gotta like how he punctuates the smacks in the sentence.

-S-

[bigbird]

Found one from Jules


I don't wanna offend you.. but on some pics, I can't even tell if it is ass or pussy..

Fantastic comment - love that one!

[ShakeZula]

SexyDeb posts a pic of her, then later says what she does:

Originally Posted by sexydeb

I work in Public Relations..

Then alf20, the smooth talker that he is, says:

Originally Posted by alf20

can we publicly relate together?

:D:D

The pic is good also, if anyone wants to check it out. She's definitely a cutie.

http://forum.xnxx.com/showthread.php?t=7894

-S-

[Caffeine]

Originally Posted by ShakeZula

I thought this was funny. You really gotta like how he punctuates the smacks in the sentence.

-S-

I was going to post this. Very well excecuted cyber smack.

[stumbler]

Caffeine on the Female Forum Members Describe your breasts thread

Mine are bigger than I'd like them to be. Then again, I'm a dude.

(Caffeine I swear I'm not trying to pick on you but you have a sterling silver ring way with words)

[ShakeZula]

Originally Posted by Kimiko

Hey, Nympho, you know how you can tell if a West Virginia girl is a virgin?

She can run faster than her brothers....

:D:D

-S-

[Kool_Madness]

From....'How are you forum females treated'
Originally posted by Kool Madness

Re-posted by Chunky


I treat all females on this forum the same, with dignity, compassion, respect and honesty. In other words, I treat them like the sex object, cum bucket, whore sluts that they are. I say that with deep luv in my heart.

[bigbird]

Originally Posted by Kool_Madness

From....'How are you forum females treated'


I treat all females on this forum the same, with dignity, compassion, respect and honesty. In other words, I treat them like the sex object, cum bucket, whore sluts that they are. I say that with deep luv in my heart.

Wasn't that your own post?

[chunky]

Sorry that was me being lazy and just moving the whole post, yes, it is a bit confusing....I won't do it again!

[bigbird]

Originally Posted by chunky

Sorry that was me being lazy and just moving the whole post, yes, it is a bit confusing....I won't do it again!

SMACK
SMACK
SMACK

I'm really enjoying smacking people today!

[Kool_Madness]

Originally Posted by bigbird

Wasn't that your own post?

Originally Posted by chunky

Sorry that was me being lazy and just moving the whole post, yes, it is a bit confusing....I won't do it again!

I glad you cleared that up, I was starting trip cause I know I didn't post that on this thread

[stumbler]

Posted by Waker
What the fuck is with all the political/war/whatever BULLSHIT on the boards today?!? This shit is really pissing me off and has no business here. Annoying "ladies check out my cock size" threads are one thing, but this is totally killing my horniness

ShakeZula's Response
\Yeah, ye of who has contributed to exactly nothing. I'm sorry I can't spend all of my time finding new ways for you to fuck bowls of spinach, but I am awake most of the time and I do notice things and I want to know what others think.
But I'm sorry, I'm being insensitive. Lets only talk about what makes you happy. Lets only do all the things you want to do and complain about everyone who makes you unhappy. Lets rename the entire planet Waker and all the people will be named Waker. All streets will be naked Waker. All proper nouns for everything everywhere will be named Waker. Because that is obviously the only thing that matters. YOu here that folks. You are no longer known as your names, but as Waker. Whatever the fuck that means. Waker waker Waker waker waker waker. Waker, waker waker. Waker waker waker waker. Waker! Waker waker waker waker spinach fucker, waker. Waker waker.

-Waker-

[stumbler]

Chunky responding to a thread asking how a guy could give himself a blow jod
The only way I could give myself a blow job is if I cut it off first. :

Kimiko's response
Guys, do NOT try this at home. Chunky is a trained professional

[ShakeZula]

Originally Posted by CowboysFan

I smell dick!!! Did you just burp?

Ha fucking ha ha. Ha.

Yeah, that's funny.

-S-

No, really it is. I would have laughed if I wasn't so pissed at other shit.

[stumbler]

ShakeZula discribing Leila's breasts

They're large, creamy and white. They project from her chest like the bows of two majestic sister ships headed for tropical virgin waters. When you hug her and she squeezes them against your chest, it instantly puts you in mind of more sinfully decedent activities best done with silk sheets and strawberries.

What's also interesting about them is when her nipples get hard, they get crinkly, which I always found adorable, and it feels good on the tongue.

To see them is to want to touch them. To touch them is to want to taste them. To taste them is to be lost in the desire for them and all their attached to and to ravage all that beautiful flesh until you are sated and at one with God.

But it has been a few years, I could be wrong.

[Pericles]

Originally Posted by stumbler

ShakeZula discribing Leila's breasts

They're large, creamy and white. They project from her chest like the bows of two majestic sister ships headed for tropical virgin waters. When you hug her and she squeezes them against your chest, it instantly puts you in mind of more sinfully decedent activities best done with silk sheets and strawberries.

They project from her chest like the bows of two majestic sister ships headed for tropical virgin waters - That is the fucking best. I luv it and it made checking out the forum tonight totally worth it. I laughed so hard I nearly had a kitten.

[Pericles]

Originally Posted by stumbler

ShakeZula's Response
\Yeah, ye of who has contributed to exactly nothing. I'm sorry I can't spend all of my time finding new ways for you to fuck bowls of spinach, but I am awake most of the time and I do notice things and I want to know what others think.-Waker-

I have never been witness to someone accusing someone else of having sex with a bowl of spinach. Tonight has been a night of firsts.

[chunky]

In response to the 'Guess the age of the penis' thread.......

Originally Posted by enotz24

screw guessing, just cut off the head and then we can count the rings

[stumbler]

Piggit welcoming a new member and describing the forum:

Hola! We really don't bite. Hard. Much. Often.

At least, I don't.

[ShakeZula]

Originally Posted by chunky

What do breasts do all day ?.........some just hang around, some just stick it out, others lounge around all day but perk up towards the evening.........some can't get out and some need putting away.......some just disappear at the end of the day while others manage to stay standing........
..some come to a sticky end.........some get their 'strokes', others go unnoticed.
....some of them are completely pointless, while others........

...........just can't be ignored!!

-S-

[stumbler]

MusicMachine
Everyday I look on the quotable quotes only to be disappointed. My ego is withering away.



Chunky
It would only fill a small warehouse now then..........

[stumbler]

Leila and Chunky discussing the new iPhone

Chunky
Does it vibrate....(back off topic)...??

Leila
Of course it does, with mulitple speeds for....

Oh...you mean the iPhone....

[MusicMachine]

Sorry, can't give credit to original poster because I can't remember who it was.

[kellycantcum]

quoting "SPOOK" in the sexuality thread..."what for my ass" omg...i almost fell off my chair!

...let's see, how about......your head ??
__________________
Things that go bump in the night....

http://forum.xnxx.com/showthread.php?t=8618

[chunky]

A classic come-back from Kimiko

If you put fake pearls in my pussy, I'll have a fake orgasm.

[bigbird]

Originally Posted by chunky

A classic come-back from Kimiko

I honestly pissed my pants when she put that one up !

[A010011000111]

Originally Posted by chunky

In response to the 'Guess the age of the penis' thread.......

this one actually made me laugh out loud.

[Incubus]

Originally Posted by Caffeine

Me once and everybody else many other times:

HA! caffeine started that line

oh i mean BUMP

[budgreeen]

From the thread Underage....by Death109.....i really wanna fuck a 14 year old girl, but i know i'll get caught - so i'm not going to

[As horny as you]

i totally remember that one..nice

[Ilion]

Great idea for a thread

Thanks for bumping it Incubus

[Ilion]

In a thread I'm so very very proud of myself
Started by Joe dirty the opening post was

Originally Posted by JoeDirty

I just pulled out of my nose the biggest booger that I've ever seen. (If I had a camera I would take a pic of it to show everyone.)

And---believe it or not---I had thought that I didn't have it in me anymore.

Are you all proud of me? :-D

Since Joedirty’s thread is active everyone are familiar with this post but I assume that this thread will outlive Joedirty’s thread, I believe that future newcomers will laugh out loud at this one.

[piggit]

Originally Posted by ShakeZula

I only cry during manly movies. And they aren't tears, they're little droplets of manliness and rage.

-S-

:D

[stumbler]

Thanks for digging this one back up. I just had a ball going back over some of the forum classics.:D

[piggit]

That caffeine said a mouthful ... ~sigh~

[stumbler]

Originally Posted by piggit

That caffeine said a mouthful ... ~sigh~

I still miss Caffeine too, but this is my all time favorite ShakeZula rant. I still laugh every time I read it.

Originally Posted by stumbler

Posted by Waker
What the fuck is with all the political/war/whatever BULLSHIT on the boards today?!? This shit is really pissing me off and has no business here. Annoying "ladies check out my cock size" threads are one thing, but this is totally killing my horniness

ShakeZula's Response
\Yeah, ye of who has contributed to exactly nothing. I'm sorry I can't spend all of my time finding new ways for you to fuck bowls of spinach, but I am awake most of the time and I do notice things and I want to know what others think.
But I'm sorry, I'm being insensitive. Lets only talk about what makes you happy. Lets only do all the things you want to do and complain about everyone who makes you unhappy. Lets rename the entire planet Waker and all the people will be named Waker. All streets will be naked Waker. All proper nouns for everything everywhere will be named Waker. Because that is obviously the only thing that matters. YOu here that folks. You are no longer known as your names, but as Waker. Whatever the fuck that means. Waker waker Waker waker waker waker. Waker, waker waker. Waker waker waker waker. Waker! Waker waker waker waker spinach fucker, waker. Waker waker.

-Waker-

[Leila]

Originally Posted by baller16

the human mind and the human brain are two different things.

I can't stop laughing.

[baller16]

go and quote my next post too. see how funny that is

[ShakeZula]

Originally Posted by stumbler

I still miss Caffeine too, but this is my all time favorite ShakeZula rant. I still laugh every time I read it.

I remember that guy. I often wonder what happens to the various douches and douche nozzles that pass through here.

-S-

[BlackRose]

I just could not stop busting up over this one posted in "BlackRose's Fetish Parlour" ... I so had tears in my eyes from laughing so hard at my horrible fate of being fucked to death.
:D

Originally Posted by Rudharddick

WHY DID YOU KILL/FUCK HER TO DEATH? THAT'S LIKE KILLING THE GOOSE WHO LAYS GOLDEN EGGS. UNCONCIOUS WOULD BE BETTER, THAT WAY YOU CAN GET MORE, LATER. SHE MIGHT EVEN "LOVE" YOU FOR FUCKING HER TILL HER LIGHTS TEMPORARILY TURNED OFF. :D

[stumbler]

Originally Posted by Leila

I can't stop laughing.

And did you forget this one Leila?

Originally Posted by stumbler

ShakeZula discribing Leila's breasts

They're large, creamy and white. They project from her chest like the bows of two majestic sister ships headed for tropical virgin waters. When you hug her and she squeezes them against your chest, it instantly puts you in mind of more sinfully decedent activities best done with silk sheets and strawberries.

What's also interesting about them is when her nipples get hard, they get crinkly, which I always found adorable, and it feels good on the tongue.

To see them is to want to touch them. To touch them is to want to taste them. To taste them is to be lost in the desire for them and all their attached to and to ravage all that beautiful flesh until you are sated and at one with God.

But it has been a few years, I could be wrong.

Originally Posted by ShakeZula

I remember that guy. I often wonder what happens to the various douches and douche nozzles that pass through here.

-S-

I would imagine he left the forum and sold his computer never to surf the net again after the rant you put on him.