One of the amateur writer's groups I once frequented had an exercise called 100 words. The object was to take the given subject - usually a word or sentence, sometimes a picture - and write a short piece about it, using exactly 100 words. This exercise was good to practice word economy, learning to tell as much as you can about a subject in as few words as possible, while still getting the image you want to project acorss to your readers. It was a fun little exercise, and I saved quite a few of the entries I had made, and in looking back on them the other day, I saw there were a few that might fit into the 'Sex Stories' category. I decided to post some of them here for your amusement, and welcome any comments, or even those who might like to try their own hand at the subjects listed (the subjects are underlined, and do not count against the word count).

The object is to use exactly 100 words, no more, no less. The site I used to go to had their own word counter, which I found sometimes varied by a word or two from what the one on my computer used, but no matter - whichever word counter you use, try to keep the piece at exactly 100 words.

 

A warehouse full of new mannequins

22051443 stood in the vast drying room as his paint cured. Maybe he would get a second coat, with the yellow and black markings of a crash test dummy, along with implanted sensors to measure impact force at various points in his body; maybe he would simply be another department store mannequin, modeling men's suits, or (ugh!) swimwear.

He noticed the breasts on the mannequin next to him. Ah, female, he thought. A pleasant shape, appealing, perhaps destined to be a lingerie model. He felt an ache in his loins, and looked down to see... nothing. And he screamed, silently.

 

The prodigal son returns... but something is wrong


"I've been looking for you for a long time." The old man started at the voice beside him, slowly raised his head, and opened his bleary eyes.

"You mean me?" he asked hoarsely, motioning the bartender to bring him another beer.

"Yes, you," came the reply. "You are William Decker, aren't you?" The old man nodded. "And you left your wife and son twenty-five years ago, right?" He nodded again.

"So what's it to you, sweet cheeks?" the old man asked the young lady, as he checked out her ample breasts and shapely legs.

"I'm your son, David. Hi, dad."

 

"Good news, everyone!"

It came right out of the blue.

Donna had spent all week getting ready for the party, making sure everything was absolutely perfect. Twenty of our best friends showed up, and when everyone was there, she called us all out by the pool.

"I want to make an announcement," she chirped excitedly as she put her arms around me. "I have great news - I'm pregnant. David and I are going to have a baby!"

I really don't remember much after that, except a flurry of hands pulling us out of the pool and trying to pry her from my arms.

 

Brunettes in red dresses = nothing but trouble


She came to me with a sob story about a cheating husband, this brunette in a red dress. Being a sucker for a dame like that, I offered to drive her home.

Afterwards, we headed to her place to look for evidence. On the way, we had a flat. I pumped and she pumped, then we got out and fixed the flat.

As we walked in, the overhead light blew. I screwed and she screwed, then we fixed the light.

Then she pulled a pair of 38's on me. I fumbled for the bullets, but my gun went off prematurely.

 

A roll in the hay

Cyrus drove up next to the hay roller his daughter had been operating all day. As Maxine climbed down, he spotted something odd in the distance. "What's that?", he asked as she got into the truck, pointing at a pair of legs sticking out the end of one of the hay rolls.

"Oh, that," she replied. "It's just that traveling salesman that spent the night. All night long he pawed at me, and this morning he started again. 'I just want a roll in the hay,' he says, so I smacked him with a crowbar and gave him one."

 

A few more:


A House of Ill Repute

The chime rings, the madam announcing that she is bringing my next customer up. I quickly finish washing up from my last customer, dry off, and throw on a slip just as the door opens. "This is Madeline, one of our finest - I'm sure she can accomodate you. Madeline, Mister, um, Jones would like to try some Greek, dear." The old sow closes the door.

Christ, doesn't anyone like a blow job anymore? They're half the price, but I can do half a dozen or more in the time it takes to satisfy one damned fudgepacker, and they're much cleaner.


Toilet paper

John snuggled a little closer and kneaded Donna's shoulder. "Come on, baby," he whispered as he kissed her lightly on the neck.

'No!" came the reply as she huddled deeper under the blanket.

John rolled over in exasperation. "Dammit, woman," he griped, "Why in the hell is it that you never want to make love anymore? It's got to where your idea of foreplay is six months of me begging for sex."

She didn't respond, so he continued, "I'm getting tired of the only time I get a piece of ass being when my finger breaks through the toilet paper."


Rialto


The old movie house is just another boarded up brick building on Main Street now. The marquee is bare, but you can still make out the name - Rialto.

They closed the balcony first, said it was unsafe to use any more. We had some good times in that balcony. The first time I played 'stinkfinger' with my date was up there. When they closed the balcony, well, we just went to the drive-in outside town, and climbed into the back seat.

Now they're both gone, the Rialto and the drive-in. The 24-screen mutliplex at the mall just isn't the same.


The radio alarm clock wakes you up with the following: "This is not a drill, if you haven't already, take......" static and then the power goes off

I slapped the snooze alarm and went back to sleep, but the words kept invading my dreams. Take what? Shelter? The highway out of town? I didn't know, and worried it over and over in my mind, until I finally woke in a cold sweat.

I didn't know how long I had snoozed, all I knew was that I had to take ... what? The power was back, so I turned the radio on while I feverishly started getting dressed. Then I heard it again: "This is not a drill, if you haven't already, take your Ramroddin for faster, stronger erections ..."


Dialogue only, two characters, involving the idea of "condiments"

"So the word for the day is condiment."

"Is that like a peppermint Tic-Tac you put in the reservoir of a condom?"

"Good one, you salty dog."

"Pass me some sugar, Sugar."

"Ooh, keep talking to me like that and you'll make me cream my jeans."

"Mayonnaise this great club over on Main, all they play is Latin music - wanna go salsa dancing tonight?"

"Cheez Whiz, I wish, but I need to get some rest."

"Well, it's nice to get a chance to ketchup with you."

"Yeah, I really relish our time together."

"Boy, you really mustard that one up."


Happy birthday

He smelled the alcohol when she opened the door, and knew he was in for it. As she demanded to know where he had been, why he was so late, he tried to explain about the wreck and the traffic jam, but she would have none of it. She was still raging, accusing him of having an affair, when he handed her the box.

She saw the expensive bracelet, then looked up to see him heading out the front door. "Where are you going?" she demanded.

"I'm going out for a few drinks," he sneered in reply. "Happy birthday, bitch."


Man, Myth and Magic

He came, as he always did, when she felt her sorrow was more than she could bear. One moment she was alone in her bed; the next moment he was there, caressing her, kneading the taut muscles in her back and shoulders, soothing and comforting her. He made her feel whole again.

As always, he warned her not to look as he left. She could not contain her curiosity, though, and turned to see as he reached the door. The huge bear turned and looked back at her; she could have sworn it was a look of sorrow and disappointment.

 

freethinker, a great many thanks for creating this thread

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Standing on the corner of a busy street, Terence wondered about his fate. Looking as many cars and trucks passed frequently. Thinking "what if one of those lost control and hit me" in a leisurely state of mind.

A red sports car approached his direction shining like new and veering in a jagged line. Closed his eyes tightly trying to block out the impending pain. Something lifted him upwards out of the vehicle's path. A mangled mess of metal shards and glass fragments littered the formerly busy street messily.

Terence was set down several feet away from the crash site.

 

These were all wonderful. and a great exercise in restraint. I haven't tried, but I have a feeling I will fail miserably.

 

You shouldn't say that...it's sad.

I believe in you ejls

 

Climbing the mountainside proved treacherous for most avid climbers. All but one saw these snowy peaks as a playground instead of a challenge. Gazed upward during his rise along the cliff face, keeping at a slow and steady rhythm.

Pausing only briefly to take a drink before resuming his climb.

This brave soul stood at the summit, yelling at the top of his lungs, "I am the king of the world!" creating an avalanche.

He jumped down the growing mass of white and rode it like the 'silver surfer'. Winds whipping at his face, met with cheers and much praise.

 

For you SS - I did it.


He stood before her and held out his hand. "Dance with me."

Olivia had tears in her eyes, and her bottom lip started to quiver. She stood, smoothed her skirt and moved into his arms. The soft tones of the string quartet filled the night air. They twirled around the dance floor, like skaters on ice.

"Are you okay?" he asked her, seeing the far-off look on her face.

She looked into his eyes and saw the concern her had for her. "I will be," she answered.

"That's all I want, mom. I'm married, but I'll always be your son."

 

Thank you ejls


There was a rumble in the clouds above.

Was next to nothing in comparison to the clap of thunder that proceeded it. Shaking in my ears and startling me out of my sound sleep. I sat up in bed watching nature's light show unfolding. Sky to ground contact, a multitude of white flashes illuminated the night sky unmercilessly. 57

I heard the cellar door open from the strong winds, which I ventured outside to barricade shut. One step out the door and a cow flew by just a few feet in the distance, crying out "moooo!" as a precaution to anyone listening.

 

Coffee

He knew it had been a horrible performance.

Last night he had been magnificent, at the very top of his form, but this morning he hadn't been able to quite get it together. A quick glance at his watch confirmed it - less than five minutes had passed.

The look of disappointment on her face said it all. He rolled out of bed and started getting dressed, apologizing profusely, watching her roll back over and ignore him.

Damnit! Why did she have to wake up so damned horny?

Screw it. He wasn't worth a fuck in the morning without his coffee.

 

"It occurred to him that he might see scenes now that would shatter him forever. No matter: he had to know."

David stood in the doorway for a moment, letting his eyes adjust to the darkness, then began to creep slowly down the pitch-black hallway. He stayed against the wall to minimize the chance of the floor creaking, except where he had to pass the small table at the head of the stairs. The strange noises coming from the room at the end of the hall had awakened him, and he had to look. It occurred to him that he might see scenes now that would shatter him forever. No matter: he had to know.

He opened his parents' bedroom door...

 

Train

"Where the hell have you been?" Sean railed, as Casey limped across the yard. "How the hell am I supposed to train you to run this train if you can't get here on time?"

Casey hobbled over and replied, "I just had trouble getting up a head of steam this morning."

Sean pointed at his leg. "What happened there, Mr. Jones?"

"Well, my brother got married yesterday, and I got there a bit late, and ended up following the bride down the aisle," Casey began.

"And?"

"Well, I got so interested in watching her caboose, I tripped over her train."

 

Running through the mini-mall in my underwear.

I exited the time portal, nude of course - you can't take anything with you, not even your clothes. That's why the operators were always supposed to drop us somewhere where we could grab some clothes once we landed, such as a clothing store, or a laundromat.

I looked around, grabbed the nearest piece of clothing I could find, and cursed myself for having had an argument with my operator before I left. The sumbitch had dropped me in a Victoria's Secret, and the skimpy crotchless panties I found left my, um, manhood hanging loose as I ran through the mall.

 

You ride off into the sunset. What now?

"I'm gonna miss you," Earlene told me as she pulled me close for another kiss.

"Don't worry, darlin'," I reassured her. "I'll be back in a week or so, soon as I get this load to LA and get a load back." I held her close, kissed her long and hard, then let go and climbed into my rig. I blew her a kiss, put the truck into gear, and headed west.

The glare from the setting sun made it difficult to see the cell phone screen as I looked to see who I could call at my next stop.

 

"Sugar coat it for me", Evelyn crooned as a songstress would. Her voice a violin's trip across its strings meandering through varying levels of pitch. I wanted to pray for her to get laryngitis but that meant everyone once again could resume their avoidance of workly responsibilities.

All she did was take hold of her microwavable cup and drink, disgustedly twisting up her face and slurping much like a dog does after spending hours on a walk. Her lips pursed in preparation for another sentence seeing the pick axe flying towards her head in slow motion.

That ended our conversation.

 

Delusional persons have the world's armament in their possession and are threatening to use it. How should we put a stop to this? Create a new 'boogeyman' that is tickled pink at the concept of crazy people with guns parading on the nightly news with threats of ruling the world once again in 2012.

But for all we know there are these exact people already in charge of arming the once sane military and training them to kill, leaving murderers that enjoy taking lives in federal prison to rot away and fester until they are paroled after a twenty year sentence.