I lost it when I was 16, and now I know it is not about the sex it is about the chase. That is where the real fun is.

 

I don't consider that a virgin. It's like I say "a girl can be a whore and still have her hymen"

basically meaning in my point of view, any sexual act counts as sex.

 

/only seen like 4 women naked
my mom aunt other aunt(only saw her tits)and some other bitch didnt get to fuck any of them

 

nice as i already said (you maybe didnt read) i also have a fuckin sexy aunt! total milf!!! i may post some pics of her but im not sure about it

 

a friend sent me a funny one

This got the whole of Sydney laughing. Read it and you'll see why! Just imagine sitting in traffic on your way to work and hearing this. Many Sydney folks DID hear this on the FOX FM morning show in Sydney.

The DJs play a game where they award winners great prizes. The game is called 'Mate Match'. The DJs call someone at work and ask if they are married or seriously involved with someone. If the contestant answers 'yes', he or she is then asked 3 random yet highly personal questions.

The person is also asked to divulge the name of their partner with (phone number) for verification. If their partner answers those same = three questions correctly, they both win the prize.

One particular game, however, several months ago made the Harbour City drop to its knees with laughter and is possibly the funniest thing you've heard yet.

Anyway, here's how it all went down:

DJ: 'Hey! This is Ed on FOX-FM. Have you ever heard of 'Mate Match'?'

Contestant: (laughing) 'Yes, I have.'

DJ: 'Great! Then you know we're giving away a trip to the Gold Coast if you win. What is your name? First only please.'

Contestant: 'Brian.'

DJ: 'Brian, are you married or what?'

Brian: (laughing nervously) 'Yes, I am married.'

DJ: 'Thank you. Now, what is your wife's name? First only please.'

Brian: 'Sara.'

DJ: 'Is Sara at work, Brian?'

Brian: 'She is gonna kill me.'

DJ: 'Stay with me here, Brian! Is she at work?'

Brian: (laughing) 'Yes, she's at work.'

DJ: 'Okay, first question - when was the last time you had sex?'

Brian: 'About 8 o'clock this morning.'

DJ: 'Atta boy, Brian.'

Brian: (laughing sheepishly) 'Well...'

DJ: 'Question #2 - How long did it last?'

Brian: 'About 10 minutes.'

DJ: 'Wow! You really want that trip, huh? No one would ever have said that if a trip wasn't at stake.'

Brian: 'Yeah, that trip sure would be nice.'

DJ: 'Okay. Final question. Where did you have sex at 8 o'clock this = morning?

Brian: (laughing hard) 'I, ummm, I, well...'

DJ: 'This sounds good, Brian. Where was it at?'

Brian: 'Not that it was all that great, but her mum is staying with us for couple of weeks...'

DJ: 'Uh huh...'

Brian: '...and the Mother-In-Law was in the shower at the time.'

DJ: 'Atta boy, Brian.'

Brian: 'On the kitchen table.'

DJ: 'Not that great?? That is more adventure than the previous hundred times I've done it.
Okay folks, I will put Brian on hold, get his wife's work number and call her up. You listen to this.'
[ 3 minutes of commercials follow. ]

DJ: 'Okay audience; let's call Sarah, shall we?' (Touch tones.....ringing....)

Clerk: 'Kinkos.'

DJ: 'Hey, is Sarah around there somewhere?'

Clerk: 'This is she.'

DJ: 'Sarah, this is Ed with FOX-FM. We are live on the air right now and I've been talking with Brian for a couple of hours now.'

Sarah: (laughing) 'A couple of hours?'

DJ: 'Well, a while now. He is on the line with us. Brian knows not to give any\answers away or you'll lose. Sooooooo... do you know the rules of 'Mate Match'?'

Sarah: 'No.'

DJ: 'Good!'

Brian: (laughing)

Sarah: (laughing) 'Brian, what the hell are you up to?'

Brian: (laughing) 'Just answer his questions honestly, okay? Be completely honest.'

DJ: 'Yeah yeah yeah. Sure. Now, I will ask you 3 questions, Sarah. If your answers match Brian's answers, then the both of you will be off to the Gold Coast for 5 days on us.
Sarah: (laughing) 'Yes.'

DJ: 'Alright. When did you last have sex, Sarah?'

Sarah: 'Oh God, Brian....uh, this morning before Brian went to work.'

DJ: 'What time?'

Sarah: 'Around 8 this morning.'

DJ: 'Very good. Next question. How long did it last?'

Sarah: '12, 15 minutes maybe.'

DJ: 'Hmmmm. That's close enough. I am sure she is trying to protect is manhood. We've got one last question, Sarah. You are one question away from a trip to the Gold Coast. Are you ready?'

Sarah: (laughing) 'Yes.'

DJ: 'Where did you have it?'

Sarah: 'OH MY GOD, BRIAN!! You didn't tell them that did you?'

Brian: 'Just tell him, honey.'

DJ: 'What is bothering you so much, Sarah?'

Sarah: 'Well...'

DJ: Come on Sarah.....where did you have it?

Sarah: 'Up the arse.....'

They had to call an ambulance for the DJ he thought he was going to have a heart attack, he could not stop laughing.


Apparently there was an unusually high call out of the Sydney Police just after this conversation, for minor traffic collisions.

 

Haha. Well how excellent is it. I just cannot describe it in words haha.

 

OMFG thats so damn funny wish i could have heard that one on the radio.

 

I am 36, straight, and male, and still have had no luck with a lady willing to give me the time of day, let alone get that far. So you younger guys can imagine the frustration of it. Personally, I cannot wait for the day I can finally get it going and lose it.

 

i was 14 at the time and wish i had waited till later with a good boyfriend rather then my first boyfriend.

 

lost it just over 2 years ago,,and that was my last time

 

Well, I'm sure it's around here somewhere. We'll find it.

 

to jonh: im hope this is going to become better mate. i dont know how it could be without sex... of course there is the fist always waiting but its not the same i think girls should agree that a plastic one is not the same with the real one

 

to kimiko: george says: "kimiko has a good sence of humor" my name is george by the way

 

im technically a virgin - oral sex and fingers only but i love anal - so good

 

why not pussy? keeping it for the husband?

 

At a very early age . was a ganbang 5 guys 1 girl that we picked up at a saturday morning movie matinee took her to a boxcar on a railroad siding she was 16 and although at least one of the guys was close to her age i was under 12. (the youngest) Oh to be young again.

 

guess so - but have'nt really met the right guy yet - best test is how good thet anal you - most are rubbish some are average

also i'd like the guy to be a virgin like me - makes it more intimate in the meantime girls and anal are fun

 

if the guy is a virgin i think is gonna be difficult for him for the first time as it was for me and for everybody... my girl wasnt so she taught me some stuff well i think you know many stuff and stop calling yourself a virgin

 

LMAO!!! That's hysterical!