Ever broken bones?

cracked some ribs?

Got your lights knocked out cold?

Got any severe cuts, bruises or amputated limbs?


:smile: muahhahahaha!!!!:twisted: feeling a bit macabre tonight!!

So spill it.....tell us your war stories

 

Got a pair of Lugz slamed into my face by a jealous boyfreind of some girl hitting on me. Luckly I was drunk enough not to feel anything but I did have imprints on my face for awhile.

 

My last Relationship!

 

Sorry,That just kinda slipped out. I was swinging on one of those rope swing things over water,When I let go my finger got caught in the rope! OOOOWWWEEE!!!!

 

once ; i was jackin` off and somehow my jeans got caught on my pubes, it was horrible!! :×

 

Ok I have to post this because I think it would hurt. My buddy told me one day he was on the toilet and he was smoking so when he put the smoke out in the toilet water he got himself right on his sack. All I could do when he told me that was laugh my ass off.

 

dislocated shoulder

 

I've broken several bones...but the most pain I've felt was intense stomach pain that would wake me up in the middle of the night and would not go away. I would sit on the floor for hours holding a big jar of warm water against me and cry. It was stress related.

 

Food poisoning. Ive broken a bone or two, landed hard on my balls during a skating accident, bruised my ribs on a lawn chair from stupidity, attacked a hornets nest head on with a weed whacker, got shot by an air rifle, paintball gun, bottle rocket, roman candle, had my leg get sucked under a wheel while on an ATV, but food poisoning was the worst.

 

HEMMORHOIDS..........from 19 to 35. I would lay on the floor and scream, they were internal and I didn't know what was causing the pain. It would last 20 or 30mins.

Dying was a piece of cake. The coughing after heart surgery was almost as bad as the above, but at least that pain only lasted for the cough.

 

During my last deployment I had a bad reaction to some chemicals in Kuwait. It gave me an 18 hour, complex migraine. My entire body went numb and my mind went to another planet where all there was was pain. I even actually took a swing at one of the doctors, which I don't remember doing. Afterwords I had stroke-like affects, pseudo-parkinsons and diplopia for weeks, but I eventually got all better.

 

Spiral Fracture on my arm. It never healed right so my reflexes on my left arm are slow, and it can bend about five inches the wrong way. Got that playing hockey and it HURT! That was bad, that or I'd have to say when I had a molar broken clean in half exposing the nerve and not being able to fix it for a month. Also hockey related....jesus that was the longest month of my life.

 

:rose::rose:Cortisone shots to my low spine .............I did some serious screaming and thank god i didn't move:rose::rose:

 

Getting a plastic cricket bat slammed into my face hurt.
ALOT.

 

LOL lets see...36 broken bones...nah....I like the last relationship comment, but lets say my x-wife, yup that fits the bill

 

worst pain ever... miscarraige....then broken tail bone....then dental surgery where they chizzled my jaw bone(while fully awake)

 

Let's see three broken wrists, broken ankle, broken leg, slicing a 3 inch deep gash in my leg, both big toes broken at same time really painful to walk and play football talk about walking and running with a limp lol, smashed one of my fingers under 400 lbs of weight, uhm should i just stop or keep going? lol, almost done, thre herniated discs in my back ended my football career still hurts, broken elbow, and stabbed through the hand with a pencil during a fight in highschool hurt like ten bitches on a bitch boat.

 

I have no words.
Only emoticons to relay my expressions.

 

I'm not sure what my most painful thing was. I broke my arm when I was 6 and that hurt fairly bad. Then ther was the time I jumped off a 10 foot ledge and landed on a pointy rock cause me to break 3 or 4 foot bones. I couldn't walk that well for a while after that.

Or maybe (and this is hilarious to me, painful, but hilarious), one time I was really getting into a nice masturbation seesion, I mean I was everywhere, hands were all over, things were put into places... *shakes head* anyway, I went to reposition myself, when I sat up, my head hit the headboard on my bed giving me a terrible headache. Not only that, but on top of my headboard, I had a nice 15 pound text book. When My head hit the headboard, I grabbed my head in pain but accidentally knocked the book off of it. The corner of the book landed directly on my penis giving it a real nasty gouge that hurt any time I got hard for the moth following the injury.

But I'm not sure what's my most painful...

 

Quite simple.. Being mauled by an Alaskan Grissly Bear , stumbling, bleeding badly from several places as I made my way into town some 3 miles away.