This makes me chuckle every time i think of it.

I used to drive a large mobile library van in the Lake District (England). One day i was trundling along a narrow road next to a lake when i saw ahead of me on the other side of the road travelling in the same direction as me a Grey squirrel. This little bugger did'nt have a care in the world since although he heard me behind me he carried on nonchalantly. Unfortunately for him he did'nt realize i am not particularily fond of Grey squirrels (except marinated in red wine and cooked slowly with plums) because they have driven out our indigenous red squirrels which i do love. (Back in Victorian times Greys were imported from one of our old colonies and have since overrun the place. More than once !!.)

So, i swung the truck over to his side of the road and accelerated towards the unconcerned rodent. I pressed the accelerator to the floor and bore down on him and his bushy tail. I lost sight of him but felt a slight bump as ten tonnes of library van rolled over his fury ass. I stopped and jumped out to see the consequences of van over rodent. Squirrel Jam.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

 

That's cruel.

 

Officially a Cheezy Thread ( again )

 

I joined the forum Once I went to the convenience store (7 Eleven) in my white car and parked next to a white car that was similiar to mine. When I came out of the store I was not paying attention and got into the other car. I sat there for like ten seconds and said wtf? I immediately got out and hurried into my car and drove away.

 

and there we have it ladies and gents. the makings of your standard sociopath serial killer

 

+1 just geez...wtf

 

Incubus, you are like the kettle calling the pot black

 

When I was in the Army,I came home really wasted and went into the wrong Barracks.
I tried to get my key to work for about ten minutes in the door to what I thought was my room.
Finally,some Dude I just woke up opened the door and said "What the Fuck?"
It was`nt till that moment I realized I was in the wrong building!

 

one time...*deep breath* at band camp....

 

and this one time...we all lost our music and we were supposed to play this song...but we didn't know it...so we just made it up and we kept playing and playing and the conductor didnt know what we were doing and it was so funny

 

Remember camp when you were nine? I'm the guy who saran wrapped you to your bunk bed in your sleep, stuck a flashlight in your face and then yelled "LOOK OUT! TRAIN!!!"

Boy, was that funny.

 

The first time I ever got high, was also the first time I ever did cocaine, or drank alcohol. I got lost in the woods because we were camping, and when I found our campsite I scared my brother bad enough to make him shit his pants. No joke, the guy shit his pants... lol!

 

I never went to camp and i was never in the band. mmm i would get drunk or high instead. Sad

 

Hey, band dorks are people too! Well, we wear clothes and sometimes shower. uh...

So anyways, I lost my virginity to my brother's ex. Still makes me chuckle.

And I completely understand spitfire's story. I'm gonna do the same thing to the next dumb-ass canadian goose that walks in front of my car/bike/scooter. I hate those fuckin' birds!

 

i hope you get raped... then run over slowly by an eighteen wheeler. you're a piece of shit.

+1 how do we know he'll be on the news sometime having killed and eaten several human and animal victims?

 

Your mother needs to be made to weep that you were born. And you need to have your legs smashed, your tongue set on fire, and your crotch area impaled with a stake.