I'd highly recomend it, I've had some experience topping other women (not men and no PM's asking PLEASE cus I'm happily spoken for) and the results are fun to watch and there's the added bonus of the fact its an aphrodisiac.

 

And also, I wouldn't say I'm that experienced, I'm too young to be classed as experienced

 

Age and experience don't always increase symmetrically. I'm ony 27, and most of the people I interact with in the local scene are closer to their forties... a few of them are actually into their sixties. Though there has been an influx of the under 30 variety lately, it doesn't take long to sort out the ones whose interest is genuine, instead of the kids (adults my age and younger if you ask the local community) that just want to be different.

 

I have a pretty strong interest...but Zero experience...i have met no one who was willing to help with this fantasy *pouts*.

But it appears i may have to just get over it since my husband wont do it. Oh well.

 

I don't mind very light bondage, but I don't think I could get into it like most of the people in this thread.

 

lol, well I'm 19 so definately still a kid I did start early though, first did the innocent thing of tying up my gf when I was about 15 and got hooked I guess.

 

i have some interest as well. not into the really hardcore stuff but im all fore the forceful kinda stuff with rope and other items

 

why must you live so far away!

 

because some supernatural power hates us thats why lol

 

That's too bad. I promise you that if you live within four hours of a major city, you can find a group that can help you with that. Make sure your husband is okay with you getting tied up, or flogged (or whatever) by someone. May even help to remind him that sex isn't necessarily involved.

*shrug* There are so many activities and attitudes that fall into the BDSM basket. There are plenty of people who are very into only a few light kinds of play. And who knows how many people who aren't openly involved in a BDSM or fetish community who feel like you do.

Hardcore is really very subjective. I mean, whips sound hardcore, but can be used sensually. Hands sound soft, but can be used viciously.

Most people tend to mix the sensual and the harsh together somewhat, and I think there are definitely more people who prefer the sensual. The owners of the group here in Vegas exemplify this. One is a hardcore sadist, who can rather skillfully brand his name into you if you ask him politely. (though he would most likely decline to have a stranger represent him for the rest of his life.) And the other, is a sensual submissive, who isn't into heavy pain at all.

The other thing to mention, is that how extreme something is is fairly subjective as well. Interestingly, simulated forced sex, or simulated rape are considered amongst the hardest of the hardcore.

Well, you might have had some good experimentation, after all! Just the same, if you're only 19 you're going to have a lot of learning to do just on the basis of not having access to most of the better resources on the subject. Just always remember that it's supposed to be enjoyable, and have fun discovering things.

 

Most I've done is blindfolded, hands tied, whipping and teasing with scarves and other soft fabrics. Took turns in the dominant/submissive roles.

 

Well, you see, i live in Oklahoma City...smack dab in the middle of the bible belt. so...i doubt it but i would be very interested in finding one...do you know how i could?

 

Interestingly, the more conservative the area, the more likely there's a huge scene there. You should see the scene in SLC. :excited:

Anyway, here are some organizations you might want to look into.

National Leather Association - Oklahoma
While the Leather Scene is somewhat distinct from the more generalized BDSM scene, and used to be a primarily gay men's venue, it has grown to encompass all genders and sexual preferences. Leather tends to be much more structured with rank, titles, and protocol.

It's a good place to learn, and as long as you try to learn and remember their rules for etiquette (they'll be glad to tell you) you can learn all sorts of things from them. People who join the NLA tend to become lifetime members.

That is the only group I can give you background information on in your area, but there are others. Generally speaking you can contact each group and ask them about themselves. Use your judgment, and be polite and you'll go a long way.

 

^^^thanks

 

I did some more leg work for you. Here's a link to some other groups.

https://domsubfriends.com/cgi-local...tate=OKLAHOMA&view_records=View+Records&ww=on

Or just google Oklahoma City BDSM

 

OMG! that link helped a lot! you are once again my hero (but wayyyy more this time)

there were even letters and guides on how to introduce/convince a vanilla partner! (i am going to get the hubby to read them!)

 

There's a lot of good stuff out there. If you can convince him to explore it with you, even a little... here's a book you should read together: Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns. It's a great book for couples, and beginners. I've read it cover to cover with my slave, and we still go back to it from time to time, when we're trying to explain an activity to someone.

 

I was going to truncate your response a little for brevity, but since I have to agree with everything you said, I just couldn’t. The best point I can make is how important it is to find like minded individuals to help you safely explore this. Especially the Doms....IMO, Doms need to have far, far more training than subs, because of the immense responsibility that comes with the territory. Doms are doing things that are dangerous to another person, both physically and psychologically. I’ll admit when I started on this path, I was selfish, slightly misogynistic, and basically a bad, terrible Dom. I found a group in the area I was in (was in the Army at the time) and I saw all the mistakes I was making. I found another Dom to “mentor” me. He tempered my edge and helped me find a style that worked for me and that wouldn’t cause any harm to any sub who served under me. I’ve since “trained” girls, but they were ones who I was pursuing an LTR with….but that’s another story all together….

The moral here is: think before you act, and remember, what you don’t know is more dangerous and scary than what you do…..Have fun. Be safe…

 

To derail for a second, I think we need more threads like this one, with no hate or flaming and LOTS of help and respect to fellow posters.

Okay, back to the topic at hand.

 

I am really open to it

I would love to watch while my wife was used by a dom and used without limits. I would love to see what he does to her and see her please him or pay the price and then be forced into pleasing him. It would be so hot to see her forced to comply and to see all the things that can be done to her. I would like someone that is a pro to use her so he can really abuse her and I can enjoy watching the action. It would be so hot to see him even try out new things on her that he never tried on anyone before. Use the shit out of her for his pleasure no limits what so ever, anything goes.