Inspired by the recent death of Michael Jackson and the resulting spate of sick text jokes received, I've decided to create a thread dedicated to those little gems...

Please feel free to offend and create outrage...

I do know there are other joke threads out there but fuck it, this is for sick jokes only...

 

Ok, i'll go first...

Breaking News: Tragic Prince of Pop Michael Jackson has died suddenly. On a lighter note, Madeline McCann has been found in his wardrobe...

 

Farrah Fawcett arrives at the pearly gates and Saint Peter Grants her one wish, so she thinks for a minute and says "I wish all the children in the world to be safe".

The next day Micheal Jackson dies from heart attack.

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Two paramedics arrive at Michael Jackson's to answer the 911 call,
the first asks the second what they should try first.
To which the second replies, "well I don't know about you but I reckon the ferris wheel".
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Michael Jackson, a black man, a white man and a pedophile walk into a bar.

He orders a drink.
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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Alex Ferguson?

Ferguson will still be playing Giggs in August.
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R.I.P
Easy as 1, 2, 3
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Isn't it Ironic that Michael Jackson died at 2:10pm
Where the big hand touches the little hand...
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Fuck me this site's impossible to get on....

Did someone die?
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Reports are in that Micheal Jackson may have chocked on a small bone.
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Michael Jackson did manage to whisper a brief message to paramedics on his way to hospital...

"Put me on the children's ward".
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First Jade Goody, now Michael Jackson

Santa must be taking his naughty list a bit seriously this year.
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The cause of the heart attack is thought to be when Jackson was informed the £2,000 for a 10 year old was infact a car scrappage scheme.
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So Michael's carear did end with an arrest after all
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Upon hearing the tragic news of Michael Jackson's death, I was deeply saddened.
It took me 4 long hours until I could finally get on a Sick joke website.
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For Sale:

2 Michael Jackson tickets for the O2 Arena in London in July.
Going at a great price!
Genuine Reason for sale!

Call 07708510000000
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Anyone else loving Sky News at the moment?

REPORT: Michael Jackson has died.

Related Stories:
Michael Jackson delays first London concerts.
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CNN just announced that in his will he clearly states that when he dies he wants to be melted down and turned into a playstation so all the little boys can still play with him.
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Sick enough?

 

Jockeys at tomorrows race meeting are to wear black armbands as a tribute to Michael Jackson, who successfully rode more three year olds than anyone else...

 

Looks like Baby P has a new playmate.

 

John and Kate invited Micheal Jackson over to baby sit.
He over dosed on viagra.

 

Wow, number one sick fuck...oops I mean sick joke must go to you Splodge...

Reports of MJ having a heart attack are INCORRECT! He has been found in the childrens ward having a STROKE!...

 

Oh my god some people have no reguard to other peoples' time of grief and sorrow. True these were celebrities but they were also human...Farah was wife, daughter, mother, friend.. Michael was Son, dad, brother, friend. Now if you were in their shoes, would you let someone tell sick jokes about your family member that had just passed on? Go ahead and dislike what I have to say but arent these forums for giving your opinions and discussing your thoughts? Before February 2009, I couldve cared less but my life was changed that month that turned me around. Again like I said, you may not like me or what I say but I felt the need to voice my opinion.Ive said all im gonna say on this thread.

 

Please feel free to fuck off then...obviously I mean that in the nicest possible way...

I started the thread as I find the jokes funny. That doesn't mean that you have to. If offence is caused, I have completed my mission...

 

bite me and i dont mean it in the usual way. I know that doesnt mean I have to BUT I also said that you may not like what i say but thats ok, not everybody thinks alike. I as simply stating my opinion. sheesh

 

Sorry, unusual for this forum I know but i'm actually a straight female! However if you ask me often enough I might just cave in to your demands...

Actually I lie, I must go dye my hair. It our Gala Day tomorrow!...

Ocht, you edited! I thought you were flirting with me!...

 

flirting...with YOU? no

 

Haha!

Trolled.

 

o hai!
michael jackson's heart attack was due to him hearing of wal-mart's announcement of "all toddler's underwear, half off."
kthanxbai!

 

News just in from the coroner. MJ did not die from cardiac arrest He died from food poisoning. They found 12 year old nuts in his stomach.

 

It's a shame, he was just going to release a song about his life too...'Michael Jackson in A minor'.

 

lets skip the flirting and just fuck

 

Greenpeace is protesting Jackson's cremation; burning plastic is bad for the ozone layer.


He hasn't been this stiff since Macaulay Culkin stayed the night.

 

I heard this one about a week ago. Of course its no longer relevant but I still thought it was pretty good.

Things have really changed in America and Black is in.

One of the top golfers in the US is black.

One of the top TV show hosts is Black.

Even the president of the United States is Black.

I'll bet Michael Jackson is really kicking himself about now.

 

Maybe the shock of all that caused MJ's heart to fail...