I know people generally stereotype all men as horndogs...and I know that is for the most part true, but I was wanting a little feed back on something. I am a married man, and unfortunately, married to a woman that doesn't share my sex drive hardly at all. Its not that she is a bad woman, because she isn't...she is a wonderful woman, but she just never seems to really be horny. Anyway, it seems that I spend a lot of my time horny and frustrated, and usually have to "take matters into my own hands" if you know what i mean.

But here is the question: Does anyone else get resentful when you have to masturbate to stay somewhat satisified?

I actually really enjoy masturbating, but it has gotten to the point that I get angry when I have to do it. That is actually one of the reasons I have started writing stories on here. It helps me live out my fantasies a little.

 

I've always wondered why men marry women that don't satisfy them. I know there are more horny women out there like me.

 

Maybe because they love them?
sex isnt the only thing....

 

My mom taught me to be there for a man's needs and to enjoy that you are pleasing your man. To keep a happy marriage people need to satisfy the other persons wants and desires even if they don't want to or not. This also means staying attractive for your partner and yourself.

 

Maybe you're not a good lover.

*note to myself - file under "rude, emasculating comments"*

 

Maybe there should be a mandatory try before you buy period...6mths...and then return the goods if unsatisfactory?

 

that made me LOL , nice one.

 

Kinda hard to become a good lover when his wife is never horny, now isn't it?
Just saying.
Practice makes perfect, but without practice.....

 

My situation is the opposite, many times my ex husband wouldn't be in the mood when I was. He didn't get hard when he was tired and not feeling horny. He would do oral on my to get me off. Even though it was a 'quicky' I really appreciated it. Would your wife do that for you?

 

Yes. If this is the on-going status quo without extenuating circumstances, it's grounds for the dissolution of a relationship, IMO.

That's not to say you shouldn't ever sometimes have to get yourself off, but if you're masturbating more often than you're having sex, well, that's very very inconsiderate of your partner.

 

Sorry to hear bro. I never had this problem so im not sure how to answer you but, maybe you should talk to her about it. I've always had a lot of females around me so every girl I ever been with tried to keep me happy. They knew that if I didn't get sex I would go get it sumwhere else. Your situation is different because your married, best thing I can tell you to do is talk to her, make her want you. Maybe she just doesn't get satisfied. It's always good to try new things, maybe this is one of the times your relationship needs something new.

 

Well, I somehow got the impression that it wasn't always like this...that they enjoyed a more active sex life when they were first marriage. But I may have been reading between the lines incorrectly.

 

i just hope your wrong, for his sake:excited:

 

Dude, tell your wife she'd better put out, open up the relationship, or file for divorce.

Relationships are supposed to be mutually beneficial, yours is not.

 

Yes, I have to put my two cents worth in here. First off, I am sorry to hear your plight. But rest assured you are not alone. I myself have this same problem, with me the woman who is rarely horny. So let me shed a little light on the subject.

First off, the reason why I am rarely horny is as follows: we have 3 children, ages 12, 6, and 3. My husband works 8 hours, and then that's it, he's off the clock. I get up an hour before he does every morning to get myself ready for school as I am a full time nursing student at this point. I then fix his lunch, cook breakfast for the family, get the oldest two children up, the middle child dressed and brushed (teeth & hair) and those 2 off to school. I then get the 3 year old up, dressed, fed, and taken to daycare. I then spend the next 14 hours trying to juggle school work, homework, studying, housework, laundry, helping the kids with their homework, cooking dinner, and getting the youngest two children bathed and in bed.

During this time my husband has gotten up an hour later than me, ate his breakfast, got dressed, left for work, came home 8 hours later, played referee from the couch, ate dinner, got a bath, and sat back to watch TV or play a video game. I'm not saying this to put blame any where, but simply put, a woman's work in a marriage is more often than not going to be a lot more than a man's. It's just the way marriage is. I love my husband and am thankful he is footing the bills while I go back to college. But needless to say I am DEAD ON MY FEET by the end of the day. It's not that I don't think about sex or want it, it's just that my body wants sleep more than sex. I am stressed beyond my breaking point by the end of the day. I wish that I was 'more in the mood' for him, but I am not. And if a man thinks I shouldn't be tired after all this, then please by all means TRADE PLACES WITH ME!

Yes, talking is the best thing you can do. Maybe you need to spice things up. But please, do not make her feel guilty or blame her because chances are she already does. Heaven knows I do. Picking a fight with her will NOT help things, trust me. Nothing makes my legs go together quicker than my husband blaming me for not wanting sex.

For those who think ending a marriage over sex is a good idea, you obviously never been in a committed relationship before. Marriage is about compromise and it takes a LOT of work. You have to be willing to put up with a lot of shit and take a lot of shit and give up a lot of shit. After 17 years together my husband and I are determined more than ever to not be another divorce statistic. We want better for our children and for ourselves than what we had, and that includes an intact family with parents who love each other.

Now please excuse me while I go thank my husband for putting up with my ornery ass for the last decade and a half :excited:.

 

Why - because she looks fantastic, is fun to be with and makes out as if she really fancies you.

Then you get married, find that it was actually your money and security that she fancied, and so spend years being driven wild by this fantastic sexy woman who wants you to keep your distance.

Moral - have sex before marriage and make sure that your needs are well matched.

 

That's a good idea in any event...but I would also argue that a wife who denies sex to her husband has every reason to expect that he's going to go find it someplace else. And how can she object?

The converse is also true, by the way.

 

Well fucking said.

Jesus.

Shit like this needs to be said more often.

And respect to you and your husband for being determined to see it thought. And respect to your husband for not being seduced by the idiotic attitudes that pervade this site, propagating the idea that sex is the be-all and end-all of a relationship.

I wish you all the best in the future. Sincerely.

 

Those'd be "extenuating circumstances".

 

Amen