Good rant Orion. The thing is these people actually believe the bullshit posted on here. Eg the average cock size is 8", multiple orgasms are the norm, 75% of females squirt, all females love to be fucked in the ass, some even without lube, 99% of women are bi, men can cum on the hour, every hour...blah, blah, blah...

It's fucking tedious and stupid bitches like 'insanity' perpetrate that image... Anyone with half a brain would understand 95% of the posts in 'sexuality' are pure fabrication...

 

Orion and Suze - excellent points. Thank you.

 

My grandparents are 88 and 93. They still hold hands, still share a bed. He still buys her flowers.

There is yet hope in the world.

All I'm waiting for now is for some butthurt idiot to come up and trumpet that I'm only saying this because I don't get any.

Which is bullshit. I live with my fiancée. But do I get sex four times a week? Do I hell. I have uni. The economy - or rather, lack of it - is taking a serious toll on us. The relatively low frequency of sex - every couple of weeks or so - makes exactly no difference to me. Why? Because I know she's not withholding, and neither am I. It's - just - life. That's the way it goes - and before we had a society that told it wasn't as it should be, I'll bet nobody would have turned a hair.

Now when I tell people that I am 22, with a 19 year old fiancée, and have sex twice a month, they double take. Why?

 

That is a lovely image...

I have just checked out insanitys pics... *facepalm* Guys would wank over anything, wouldn't they! The comments made me laugh and that was only one thread and one page...

 

I'd do a double take as well. Why? Because I couldn't live with so little. Of course, there are shorter periods of time when there's so much going on that there simply isn't any time and/or energy left for an extensive sex life. But if it would always be like that, I guess I'd ask myself what would happen in ten, twenty, thirty years from now, once I get older and my sex drive lessens by nature.

But that's just me. I don't think there's a universal healthy sex rate for relationships. It's more about intimacy than actual sex.

 

Page 1 - is that a sausage? And my, is that dirty laundry a turn on. :excited:

 

Bullshit. Absolute bullshit. Trust me, learning to free yourself from the strictures of sexual desire is one of the most liberating things one can do.

You think we're not intimate? Of course we are. We just don't need sex to prove that intimacy.

 

No no no, you got me wrong.
First off, I didn't mean you're not intimate. What I was trying to say is that intimacy is far more important than sex in a relationship. Loosing that intimacy is way worse for a relationship than "just" not having sex on a regular basis.

Regarding my own sex life: If I am in a relationship, I want sex - a lot. There's nothing wrong with that so I see no reason to liberate me from anything. You're right that sex isn't and shouldn't be the central aspect of a relationship, I totally agree with you. But it's fun nonetheless.

 

iim in the same boat dude!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it sucks i do love her but need moe what can one do?

 

You don't need anything, apart from perhaps to grow up.

 

isnt that part of it

 

Thats funny! He is 42 and a loving husband that accepts his sex drive is not the same as his wifes. You are 22 and not yet married and free from "strictures of sexual desire". I bet Talk has belts in his closet that are older than you.

When you do "grow up" you get more accepting of who you really are and less inclined to pretend that you need more or less sex. Sex is not the only way of being intimate but it is one of the best ways to express intimacy.

If your sexual relationship is fulfilling quite often other areas of communication benefit because you feel closer and more united. Sex is not the be all and end all of a relationship but it sure helps.

 

Haha. Why do you hang out here, you self-righteous bastard, if sex is only a minimal aspect of life and relationships?

It is a major aspect. Not a panacea and not a total summation of life--I agree with your repudiation of values of porn and XNXX--but it is a major aspect nonetheless.

How do you think humanity thrives? For thousands of years sexual intercourse was considered a sacred event across most cultures. Promiscuity and the desecration of the intimate bond it symbolizes was, and still is in many parts of the world, punishable by DEATH.

People celebrate sex and some like to have it as much as possible. Its not EVERYTHING in a relationship but it can be a top benefit.

Just because you have a lot of sex doesn't mean you do not care for your partner or love her or want to do anything and everything for her. Having sex alot doesn't free you from fights, frustrations, or other problems of life. Sex can make your life better or worse and that's because sex is only a vehicle and it is only the sum what you and your partner(s) invest in and perceive of it. Its like its constituent act the cumshot--it could be interpreted in many ways from incredibly degrading to a passionate act of submission.

So YOU don't want to have a a lot of sex. You want to free yourself from compulsion. Good for you. I agree with you, possessive compulsions are harmful and immoral. But some just want to make love and find being physically intimate to be a high desirable aspect in a relationship. They find their freedom in having sex which they see as an expression of love. I see no valid reason to bash their view--it is traditional after all.

BTW, I bet the majority all those subject populations you mentioned still desire sex. Maybe it even factored into your grandparent's relationship. Did you ask them?

 

First of all, before you try laying a broadside on me, try reading the original post, and my response to it.

In particular, this part of his post.

To which I responded;

Now, as just about anyone will tell you around here, I'm about as sympathetic as they come. But there comes a point when all reasonable avenues have been exhausted.

I also don't recall saying to drop someone without discussing it first - in fact the OP had certainly given the impression of bringing up the topic many times. And I'm sure you know of people, both male and female, as I do, who literally don't lift a finger to do much of anything. The general impression given by the OP in his posts, is that he runs around doing everything, and she sits there and lets him. Would you like to tell me you personally would find that acceptable in a relationship, if your partner made little or no effort, either in bed, or out of it?

Well... would you?

Now it may turn out there are underlying reasons going on, that none of us know about. She may have an underlying health problem. She may be going through the menopause. She might be depressed. Or she could be wearing herself out at work. None of us know. But if it turns out she is basically sitting there and letting him doing everything for her, while giving little or nothing back, and he's asked reasonably for her to participate in this relationship, without response - which his previous posts would seem to indicate he has - then isn't it time to take more direct action? Or would you rather a ten year discussion of it, where exactly nothing happens?

If you are in a long term committed relationship, then by that comment you made you obviously don't value that or your partner very much at all, if one wrong action or reaction by a partner against you is enough to cause you to end it immediately... or were you being sarcastic?

Bye for now - Fluffy McNoo.

 

I had the same problem with my wife. I set myself up so she would catch me masterbating and to come find out this turned her on very much made her so horny she literly raped me since then we have a very good sex life even putting on a show for each other my sex drive is still stronger than hers but sex 3 times a week is better than 1 every 2. Weeks

 

Thanks for all the different feedbacks. I thought I'd add a little more info. It's not me...the fact is, there is very little I wouldn't do for her if she asked. And I do mean that it is a very minute list of things I'm just not willing to do. i.e. another man. Not happening...LOL. Luckily she has never asked.

She has just never had a sex drive. She says she has no fantasies and really doesn't think about having sex more than once every two to three weeks, and even then its not a strong urge.

Also want to say that I'm not looking to get out of the relatioship...but after nearly 20 years of disappointment, Is it really that wrong to wish for more from your wife.

 

If its been 20yrs you need to talk to her. I might be delicate procedure but communication is always best. No sex drive for 20yrs? How did you get by for so long? Or should I say, why are you so frustrated now?

 

Q: What do you feed a woman to reduce her sex drive by 90%


A: Wedding cake



I'm just coming out of a 20 year marriage. We lived together for a year before the wedding, and the sex was great. Our record was making love at least once a day for 59 days in a row. After the wedding, things started going downhill. It got to the point where sex was once a month, on that day just before her period began when she got horny. I resented the hell out of it. For a long time I did everything I could to restore the old days - complimenting her, buying flowers, doing housework, doing things she wanted to do in our time alone together. I remodeled two houses for her (there's a saying that the sexiest thing to a woman is a man with a hammer.) Nothing worked, I got tired of always being the one to initiate things and getting turned down 99% of the time, and gave up. I started spending my time on business trips trying to get laid, spent a lot of time on online porn, which she came to resent. I'm sure this inability to work out the sexual dimension of our relationship contributed to the divorce, but I really don't know what I could have done better or different.

 

Sorry, but all I see here is people pushing the agenda that society propagates - that sex is the be all and end all, sex is the bench-mark, sex is the final answer.

And it's not.

 

Sorry X just a little confused here, I think I agree with what you said but your perspective is quite rare (even unique).

The OP is complaining basically about having to wank to satisfy his sex drive, I do not think he is referring to intimacy which is a totally different thing as you have successfully argued (as usual). There is a difference between sex to satisfy a sex drive and sex as an intimate act, call it love if you like.

One can achieve orgasm through sex in the intimate act but also through a casual sex for sex's sake but they are different. You have experienced casual sex in a rather unique situation or at least rare situation.

Do you think your rather unique perspective influences your judgement here? As compared to say the population as a whole.

Thinskin