LOL ... I would love to hear her rebuttal to this post.

I'm guilty of the "not checking my pockets" too. Luckily the cleaning lady isn't.

 

I Hate the clutter.
I hate the nagging.
I hate the way things don't get put back in the proper places.
I hate the way blu-ray discs don't go back in their cases.
I hate the way my bathrooms are full of junk
I hate the way they steal the covers at night.
I hate the way most of them cook
I hate the shows they watch on television
I hate the way they never admit to being wrong despite overwhelming evidence.
I hate the way they just get louder and louder when losing an argument.
I hate the way they go through your stuff
I hate the way they want to know who it is every time someone calls and why they are calling.
I hate the way they want to read every message I receive.
I hate the way she parks her car in my garage.
I hate way her heels leaves marks on my floor.


But most of all what I hate is the fact they don't understand the concept of alone time. They want to be there every waking minute of your life. Then they ask "What are you thinking about?" and expect a deep meaningful response, and get angry if you don't provide them with one, instead of the truth with things like "I wondered if I could throw this coin into that vase" or "wouldn't it be cooler if dogs has six legs instead of four". Sometimes I'm actually thinking of nothing, zero, completely empty, but if you respond with "nothing" they think you are mentally cheating on them with someone else.

 

Look on the bright side!
At least you are not bitter and pissed off

 

A comedian said it well once at a show.

A man and a woman go out on a date ........ bla bla bla. After dinner they are driving and the man has a perplexed look on his face and the woman's brain goes into overdrive trying to figure it out. She lists off a bunch of reasons why he might have that look including:

***Womans thoughts***
Did I eat to much
Did I have food stuck in my teeth
Did I wear the wrong dress
Do I have to much make-up on
Did I say something wrong
Should I have offered to pay
Was I late in getting ready
Did I laugh enough at his jokes ... and a few more thoughts.

***Mans thoughts***
Are those my brakes squealing like that, I just did them 3 weeks ago.

There you have it in a nutshell DS. :excited:

 

You really ought to do it.
It is totally fucking fascinating.
I once lived with two women.
I could do anything I wanted to do as long as I didn't leave the toilet seat up.

I came home one morning, Easter Sunday morning, and I was sooooo fucked up that I couldn't fucking stick my key in the lock to get in the house, so I started kicking the door down at 6am.
I was let in and I never heard a word about it.

But if I left the toilet seat up, I committed a crime against humanity and never heard the fucking end of it.

I think that sort of perspective is healthy for one to learn.

 

How much time do you have?

 

LMAO ... that is some funny shit doggy. :excited:

wtf is with drunk guys thinking that a boot makes a better door key than a door key itself ???

 

I'm single now. After being divorced and trying to find love again, I have decided that it's not worth the hassle.

The only person I was ever happy spending my life with, and was properly in love with chose God over me.

Then I met my ex-wife she married me for my money, but she was extremely hot and fantastic in bed so i didn't care too much at the time. My relationships tend to start out amazing, but the moment they move in with me, things take a turn for the worst.

 

Leaving the dishes on the sink with food caked in it when there's a perfectly empty dish washer it can be placed in.

 

something that really annoyed me about living with both of the guys i have lived with was the constant nagging for food. "get in the kitchen and make me a sandwich bitch!"
The kitchen joke is dead from abuse. STOP USING IT!!

 

Use Lioness' technique with the sandwich thing, when some one asks you to make them a sandwich just reply "poof *waves fingers at person*... you are a sandwich".

 

I happen to be married to mr perfect so no peeves as such, except one tiny one......he throws his dirty laundry in the direction of the laundry basket, if it misses it stays on the floor til i pick it up

 

Pet peeves?

Leaving your whiskers in the sink when you shave
What the fuck is so hard about rinsing off the dishes before you put them in the dishwasher?
Clothes on the floor
Not being able to fold clothes or hang them up properly
Surface cleaning...see that crap stuck in the grout on the kitchen counter, or the grease in the microwave vent...how about the fucking microwave? Cover the food when you heat it, keep an eye on it and don't blow the shit up, then leave it in there to dry to cement like hardness
Empty the fucking ashtray, if you're going to smoke
Toilet seat up or down, I don't care...but do you HAVE to piss all over the fucking toilet and the floor?
Bath towels may be great for soaking up various fluids, from oil and tranny fluid to the coffee that ran out all over the counter because you didn't put the coffee carafe all the way in, but you have a couple hundred dollars in rags in the laundry room from the previous bath towels you ruined...
Incessant chatter. Can you just shut the fuck up for half an hour?
Does the TV REALLY need to be on 24/7?
If I need help with something, I'll ask. Quit bugging me and find something useful to do, like surf porn
Over or under, however you want to do it, but put the toilet paper in the dispenser, don't leave the empty cardboard tube in and put the new roll on top...
Wash the butter dish before you put a fresh stick in there
Even glad trash bags that claim you can't tear them, tear. If the can is full, take the trash out. There's no trash fairy that makes it disappear while you're sleeping. That's me, taking it out at night so it doesn't smell and YOU don't try stuffing in more than it can hold...

Shall I continue?
And Fluffy wonders why I like being alone....

 

holy crap !

 

OH MY YOU POOR SWEETHEART, massive cuddles for you.

actually reading that there was one on there for my fella..............toilet roll, that's his trick too, just rest it on top and it magically slides in place of the cardboard tubing lol

 

massive hugs be damned - she needs some cock and badly !

 

LOL Beautiful, I have TONS more. I figured that was enough ranting for one post though :excited::rose:

I'll take the cock...as long as it doesn't want to move in with me, BB

 

PMSL !!!!!!

 

its not cock she needs it is cock that causes the problem, she wants a woman to fuck her senseless then clean up afterwards with her so ner ner ner

 

I'll go for that too :excited: Are you volunteering Telem?