so it's a weird one , I recently started seeing a girl (2 weeks or so) and she's beautiful and we have everything in common, which is good, we've also had some conflict and emotionally opened up about some deep personal stuff , and twice now we've tried to fuck (one time was on intoxicants ) and my dick is literally dead , mentally I'm horny but my dick doesn't move , she's offered to do everything I desire too, so not only am I. Embarrassed (never happened before) but she probably feels insecure now.. Im 23I'm 6 foot 5 slightly out of shape but still in good shape , have no health issues (but will get checked) .. Now to the point , part of me thinks because how deep some of our times has been there's been pressure on me sub concously (not performance but just mentally ) and that could have a impact , another part of me wonders if I pop a viagra , and my dick feels how good she feels maybe it will get rid of the problem in future , also if it's a mental thing can sexual attraction develop(I find her so sexy) since we've been together almost daily I haven't had a chance to watch porn and test , but twice since we met I've cum by myself , but it was a lot of effort , almost forced ,


Thank you for anyone who has the time to read that and even more if you can help, it's very delicate matter so I'd appreciate all gentleness

 

There is an awesome British comedy TV series which had a story line similar to what you're describing(Episode: The Melty Man Cometh). The magic of watching great TV is that you can actually work out some emotional hang ups vicariously, particularly while laughing. It's a short cut thru emotional baggage which I heartily recommend. The show might be fun to watch together.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coupling_(UK_TV_series)

In your case, I wonder if your heart is in conflict with your head. Maybe your heart wants to start out sweeter sex than you're used to? I'm spit balling here, just brain storming. But that TV series above goes into things like that, when a man has a habit of not too attached sex, and then suddenly he's different kind of sweet on someone.

 

2 weeks? And you guys already emotionally opened up about personal stuff. When are you two getting married, next week? Don't you think you might be moving to quickly? You see each other every day. I did that with my girlfriend in grammar school. Slow the fuck down. Take a breath, and don't put pressure on yourself. Try longer forplay and slow long oral for her. Stress is a major cause with sexual performance. And stop jerking yourself off. You have a girlfriend now. Once you two get married there will be plenty of time for jerking off. Because that's all you do after a few years of marriage.

 

Stop worrying about it, your making yourself worse, just relax have fun with her and I'm sure it will workout, plus you don't just need a cock to please her, lots of other things you can do

 

Dude it could be a lot of things, from depression to heart disease. On the other hand, at 23 you should be a walking erection. If you think it is more than the yips which is what it sounds you should go to the doctor.

 

I looked at your profile. It is weed related.

 

Everyone that's posted so far seems to hit on a lot of great points that you should take to heart. Its also really crazy to me that you would be opening up about deeply personal stuff and trying to be intimate in 2 weeks. That's a blink of an eye in the scheme of things. It took me 6 months before my husband and I had sex, we've now been together for 15 years, married nine of those years. So, part of it may be you need to slow down and get a real emotional connection to this person.

 

Looked at your photos and you had some nice boners. How about in the mornings when you wake up do you have a stiffy ? If it keeps up for another month or two and no woody go see a doc and tell him. Try and cut down on alcohol

 

Some great replies , let me try reply to some, yea we've moved fast , it's strange. Weed I doubt it I smoke monthly, alcohol however is a need to cut down. Also my sex drive on a whole is pretty low, normally I could cum 2/3 times a day and now barely been once a week

 

Can we see her? It might not be you at all...

 

Get checked out by a doc, just in case. Following that sometimes there is certain chemistry lacking...You say she is really pretty, be honest, is she striking enough to be intimidating to you. I have had sex with a woman way out of my league when I was younger and I had several difficulties with it. It can feel really funny getting naked with a lady who is simply way better looking than you are. In retrospect I was just being self conscious but I wasn't used to caring and it felt very foreign to me.

Also, several medications I have taken have given me that difficult orgasm feeling. In every case exercise fixed it for me. If it has been awhile since you went for a run or lifted any weights, try it for a week or two, it almost always get the hormones back into action.

 

Thankyou !! It could be chemistry thing , she's not as attractive as my ex but she's way cooler and there's tension , but I can't seem to think about sex my drive has gone down massively , could be stress could be drugs and alcohol, I don't wake up hard any more , but I want to fuck lol, will viagra work , if I use one and end up fucking will it become natural again? I need to work out also I'm in average shape though , I've slept with really in attractive girls , I've been horny for no reason , like I'm always horny !

 

Horny with no hard on...life is cruel.

 

There's some great advice here, and I'm sure you'll sort it out if you only read half of it. I'd add to that, as you said you would, have some blood tests done. Ensure they check your testosterone levels. It is precautionary, and a positive result will only lift another bag off your worried back.