Should I be worried that i'm still a virgin? I'm a 30 year old black male of average looks and such, and i haven't had sex yet. Black guys are stereotyped for get it all the time, but not me. My friends are telling me to be patience, and that's what i've been doing for years. I'm a nice guy, i have a decent job, and i'm not a player or anything like that. Am i missing out on some trend, or am i just not trying hard enough? I'm worried, because i'm a 30 year old guy and still a virgin. Some say it's good thing, while others say it means you could be a mental case. I'm not mental or a pyscho, but i am kinda shy and navie when it comes to dating and sex talk. I even made the mistake of taking a female co-worker out on a $830.00 date. She gave me a kiss on the cheek and said "lets just be friends," and i said "okay." The next day all my friends got up in my ass about it, and haven't forgiven for spending that much money on a date. So, as of right now i'm staying away from women until i figure what i'm doing wrong.

 

You just need to get out there and be yourself. I'm sure the right woman would come along.

 

need to broaden your horizons, trying taking up new hobbioes where you can meet new friends and have things in common to talk about and build up friendships that way and let them develop into someoething more rather than trying to buy affections on $830 dates!

 

Don't want to freak you out, but are you really sure you're into women?

I've been in the very same situation at your age. I know all the comforting phrases, like "the right girl will come along, just wait!". The self-decepting "I'm too busy at work!". And I waited. Nothing happened.

When my head turned "itself" towards handsome guys, I blushed and tried to ignore my feelings. When I looked at couples, I usually found the guy more attractive than the girl ("why is he stuck with such an ugly chick?"). Getting a girl-friend seemed like a enormously complicated task, requiring some mysterious talent I was lacking. And always those nagging questions: "Why am I still alone when that ugly, stupid, fat moron has a girl-friend?"

I took me too many lonely years to accept that I'm gay. The fact that tits and ass do arouse me to some degree didn't make it easier. But it is hard to describe how liberating it was when I finally admitted it to myself.

 

That's exactly the wrong thing to do. Learn how to be assertive. Learn how to have fun in the moment. You have to find your own style but start by approaching women like they will never ever touch you anyway. This will put you in the right frame of mind (i.e. you won't be thinking about getting some). After you get over that mental barrier, everything else will come naturally. Just have fun and be yourself. It will take time and you will fail often. Shrug it off and keep on putting yourself out there.

One last thing, beware of the "friend zone". Do a search on this forum to read about that.

 

Well, though people may find it strange, at least you weren't somebody's slut at any point in your life.

If nothing else, anyone that makes fun of you, you can have the last laugh.

And kudos to you.
Someone will come up out of the blue and completely unexpected.
It tends to be how it happens.
=D

 

Eh. What was the main point of your post - trying to get laid or trying to find love?

Also, you're making out being a virgin to being the biggest loser in the world. It's not. Sex is awesome, don't get me wrong, but it's not everything, especially in a good relationship. Think of it as an added perk instead of the pot of gold waiting at the end of the rainbow.

If all else fails, get new friends with better priorities. They don't seem to be that nice anyway (IMHO).

Best of luck.

 

I guess my main point is that i'm looking for love. That's what i really want in life.

 

maybe your gay

Hey don't get upset, maybe your gay and not straight,, look at the other side,,:rose::rose:

 

not a problem

 

By the sound of it you are probably shy and intimidated by women.

Why don't you go to an adult establishment and book a working lady.

You may learn something from these professionals.

It may also boost your confidence.

Just my opinion.

 

I'm pretty sure i'm not gay. I don't feel or have attraction to others guys. Sometimes i envy them if they have a cute girlfriend or wife.

 

Let me ask ya smth? Those $830.00, do you still regret that you had spent that money on a dating?

 

Yeah I do, because that was the start of me putting myself in a position for being labeled a fool and sucker for a pretty face. I guess i got big headed and thought that something was going to happen. But instead, i made myself look like a stupid loser desperately looking to get laid by someone.

 

Errare humanum est. You just made a wrong bet.

 

I can't tell you how to make a right bet in this case. I'm not an expert. Intuition is the point in this case. But you can't be trained one.