I thought this was cute...What do you want for Christmas???

Dear Santa, this year, please send clothes for all those poor ladies in Daddy's computer."

 

Dear Santa,

Please send those poor ladies to my computer

 

Dear Santa:

Fuck off.



Christmas; another disaster.

 

Dear Satan.

Burn in hell christmas music!

This is not a request. It's a demand.

*Santa..satan..you get what I mean.

 

Dear Santa I would like for you to have Paige sent to my bed wearing nothing but a ribbon

 

Dear Santa...
Can we possibly have just 1 day without any conflicts in the world.....

Can you have a good talk with all those stupid world leaders, and tell them that instead of spending their money on ways to kill each other. They should spend the money on finally finding a cure for cancer...

Can we have free Orange flavoured condoms for the over 30's

Can we see a certain M. Schumacher make a stunning return to F1 with Mercedes, and show everyone that even the over 40's can still drive and win drivers world championships...

Can you see your way to ensure the Washington Redskins win the next 2 Super-bowls....

 

Dere Santa

for cwismus i wud lyke a pony called Doris Higgenbottom Rainbow Princess who will eet the grass so mi dadee dusnut haf to coz his bak is sor an she will poo on the flowerz that mumee lyks so much.

Fank ooo Santa

Love

Beky (aged 6)

ps i will leev sum polish owt on cwismus eev so yew kan shine rude olfs nose x

 

Dear Santa,


Please give me a divorce! :excited:

 

I didn't realize you were Mrs. Claus!

 

Dear Santa,

Can you please quit giving out toys and gifts to everyone and instead do something that is useful, like stop all crime, hate, general douchebaggery, damage to the environment, cease corruption, reorganize governments so that they serve the people instead of the corps and things like that? Please? I haven't been particularly good this year, but I haven't been particularly bad either.
In fact, and I don't mean to offend, a system in which one rewards others for good behavior is inherently flawed. There is no guarantee that the one judging behavior is not going to be biased, whether one were a timeless Elf, or even a Saint.
Furthermore, the people being rewarded will quickly learn that to get more things, they only have to behave good. The intent of the system is then lost, because people should be kind to one another out of the kindness of their own hearts, not because they are hoping to be rewarded. Ah, but such is the flawed nature of our souls.
Secondly, by punishing others for not being good, there is no motivation to actually be good other than the promise of gifts. A person that's down on their luck isn't going to feel warm and lovey if they receive some simple gift. A person like that needs help getting themselves back on their feet. But help is something that is frequently not available, so the person is left to despair, cursing their own bad fortune and a world that doesn't care.
Dammit man, people are dying out there, they need good food and a warm place to live, not a simple prayer, or some clothes to keep the bitter cold out. Instead of using your elves to create a toy for every child, why don't you construct a house for every person that needs a house, a school for every child that desires to learn, a job for every person that needs to work, and hospitals for every person that is ill.

I feel I have stepped out of place in addressing you in such a manner, and I apologize. This has been on my mind for awhile.

Oh! And don't say something like, "I help those who help themselves."! That's a cheap cop out. Most people in the world spend their time trying to survive, we're already trying to help ourselves.

- Silver Wolf
​

 

Wow, Santa, I was going to ask for shoes (you know how I like them) but now I'm a bit shamefaced...hhhmmmmm....Ok, I know.....Santa, will you give the poor wolf some nookie...he's awefully serious.....

 

Am I hearing an offer?

I'm not hearing a no! :excited:

 

:awesome: Well it is Christmas...and if I can take care of you for Santa, maybe he won't forget those shoes after all

 

Hm hm... That's a good girl. :rose:

 

Ah...Jim Reeves. What country music is supposed to sound like. He was the greatest.

 

Dear Santa,

Is it possible to download the complete working knowledge of Arabic? That'd be nice, like awesome nice...

I've been good, or at least in bed?

 

Dear Santa,

Money's tight this year, please clean my fireplace for me while you're there. And keep your yule log away from my lady.

 

Dear Santa,

Could you please stop raping me everytime you come here. I mean seriously it's every fucking year. You are seriously mistakeing the meaning of "milk and cookies for santa." Now I know that Mrs. Claus isn't giving up no ass but that dosn't mean you have to do me. Please santa please stop raping me.

ps if you are going to rape me please make sure im the one in the bed my boyfriend is scarred for life after what happend last year