I wanted to see if anyone else has had this problem or shares this problem

I have been in a relationship for 7 years with my girlfriend, she is beautiful, talented and nice yet I'am un-happy. I dont know what to do I can't think of a good reason to stay or leave. It always seems to come out even and maybe I'am the problem.

I'am very passionate about my hobbies, building cars and bikes, and doing design and engineering work . I spend hours a day doing these but she cannot support these hobbies, she cant understand why I spend money on them or understand why I like ride motorcycles. I support her going for yoga training and her dancing education, going to her students performances etc. However she will support my painting and drawing...whoo! I enjoy things to be a little more adventurous. I also like going out and spending time with friends and meeting people.

She is outgoing and wants to travel but all she wants to do is look and observe not par-take...very pg and boring. However I do have a good time with her and she is very sweet. Also her sexual appetite is kinda flat with occasional flare ups, far and few in between. I have tried for a long time to change this to no avail. She also cares for me very much.

We were also on and off a few times in college and during those periods I hooked up with a few girls but never a relationship and this felt horrible. I'm not sure I could ever marry her because of this guilt.

Anyone have some insight on this?


P.S. Sorry for a bitchy/emo rant I just dont like talking to anyone I know about this

 

Message from a nice girl

People will be surprise how many men hate us nice girls.Why don't you get yourself a biker/stripper chick then problem solved. Who knows she may think you are a wet blanket too, and is cheating on you. I would, since you seem like a rebellious wild card, bad boy biker dude, which is not sexy to some women. Hopefully she will break up with you. In fact you need to pray on it, that she will.

 

And see fellow nice girls

This is a prime example of why you should leave men like OP alone. Bad boys are no damn good. Trust me I know cause men like him approach me all the damn time, thinking I am an easy lay.

 

umm i think you got the wrong impression. I'm not some radical, bar hopping beer drinking POS. Also I'd rather not bring home a stripper to my parents, thanks. (no offense to strippers, just couldnt mentally handle that scenario).

Thanks for the advice but, dont be an ass just because I disagree with your opinion in your other thread.

 

I didn't see you comment. But for serious though nice girls like me, and your soon to be ex-girlfriend should not be bothered by men like you. Your girlfriend needs a nerd, or a true genuine nice sweet guy that's on her level, and I guess you are not it. You said it yourself,honey. Hopefully she will meet a nice man like Anna Nicole's Smith husband.

 

Well you dont seem so nice to me, haha. Anyways I'll take your advice into consideration.

BTW I'am a nerd I read comics, read a lot of books (15 in the past 3 months) and I'am an engineer...realll bad bay haha

 

You have to figure out what is going to make you happy. If you aren't ultimately happy, then neither of you will be. Don't settle or try to force yourself to believe that you can become happy because you won't be unless you think you can get past the things that bother you. You can't force or wait for anyone to change, but you can work on changing yourself. You may realize when you break up that she really is the best person for you and you can try to reconcile. On the other hand, for all of her great qualities, you may realize that she really isn't for you. You could just be straight with her and tell her your concerns. Depending on how she reacts, you will know what to do. It sucks to break up with someone that you care about, but it will suck worse if she isn't right for you in the long run.

One more thought...just because people have different interests doesn't mean they can't have a good relationship. You just have to be accepting of what makes each other happy. I ride too and a lot of people think anyone who rides a bike is nuts. They don't get it, but that is part of what makes us tick. Good luck.

 

What if... Oh i dont know, You were honest with her?
Tell her what your feelings are?
I don't think you have too much to loose.

 

Yup!

 

Agreed. Communication is key and if you cannot casually express this feeling and be met with a desire to help - it'll never work. You'll always feel a "what if..."

 

It sounds as if you have little in common. Sometimes people just don't click. If you are unhappy now, it is certain you should NOT get married to this girl. Good luck!

 

I agree...the person you marry needs to be more sympatico than she appears to be. Either that, or you have to accept that your wife doesn't share your interests and you don't share hers. That might work in some marriages, but it definitely wouldn't work in mine.

 

:rose:I like that in our community and welcome to the festivities! Your girl is the kind you "marry" and if your not ready for that, be honest with yourself?
If not you could still salvage a opportunity to "teach" an inexperienced girl how to have "great sex!" :excited:

 

Ya man nice girls like like me should tell guys like you who are trying to keep there relationship together that there girlfriends should leave them (read sarcastically)

 

on a serious note you should try to get her to help you out while working on your car or take her for rides on your bike. try to explain to her why you like doing what you do. for example it calms you down and relaxes you or its a challenge and you like to test yourself and knowledge. thats why I like working on cars. as for hooking up with girls in college just flat out tell her but make sure she know it was when you werent together and it means nothing to you but you feel bad because of whatever reasons you do

 

Its your fault for staying with her for so long if you know your sexual appetite is the way it is dude. Besides her being a wimp in bed (yeah, like the first girl you leave her for wont be, or the next, or the next, or the one after that), you should thank god shes so nice.

It is your damn problem, and youre gonna regret leaving her. But if you regret being with her then fine, leave and dont go back. 7 fucking years dude, Im fucking jealous.

 

Sounds like a relationship of convenience and your afraid of what you may lose, not what you might gain.

Time to be honest with yourself and either adapt to the present or go for broke.

 

You should give her a good hard ass fucking and teach that bitch some discipline.....


And let us know how it goes.

 

fucking mystery

won't bring home stripper chick
brings home limp prude
doesn't get stripper chick
gets limp prude.
and is like
why I getz limp prude chick
Why she not stripper chick in bed?

Mystery to solve'ed