What is her thoughts on children? I have not met too many girls that age that doesn't want kids. If you give her one that will put you in the area of 65 years old when the child might be able to leave home. Most women hit their sexual prime around 30 i hear so in another 10 years you may have to put out more than a 57 year old body can handle.. Just a couple things to ponder.....

 

She's 18?
You are 47?

Back off.

What the hell, dude, she's........................18.

Other than a fresh 18 year old body, what are you expecting here?
Meaningful conversation?
Common interests?
Doubtful.

Nope. Back off. In fact, RUN. no good can come of this.

 

ok so there will be many different views and or opinions I feel the only ones that are beneficial here to the question is the ones that have had a similar experience.If you haven't done it then what really do you have to offer but your opinion?Therefore I have been there and it was the best time of my life as long as you both talk about all the little things and or what you both want and expect from the other then honestly you will not have a single regret.

 

+100

 

for what its worth
i am 10 years the senior of my wife
we are happy and still as much in love today as when we met
we founded our relationship on commonalities and shared interests
we both have similar backgrounds just different nations of origin
its not the number that matters it is the emotion and there does need to be an unrelenting love and a deeper friendship before any relationship can succeed

19 years is a bit of a stretch but it can work if you invest into it 1000000000%
trust is the #1 rule
then being friends

 

ridgerunner...excellent answer agree 100%

 

She certainly seems to be serious.

Right now, I want this with every fibre of my being, but I do have questions (of myself) that still need answering.

Time will tell on that Dave, but her family is fairly comfortable as far as I'm aware.

She hasn't mentioned wanting to start a family - yet. I know that she's going to be attending university for at least 4 years and after that she'll be looking for employment and starting her career in earnest. If we're still together then, she'll be in her mid 20's and the possibility of children is a real one.

She approached me and not the other way around - I've told her about what I think are my worst features and qualities and she's adamant that she wants this relationship. Go figure.

Yes, I agree - both good and bad experiences are welcome. I want to have as much information when going into this so that I'm not blind. I have to explore every option and avenue before either committing to a relationship or doing the right thing and letting her out gently.

10 to 15 is more than acceptable for this type of relationship as far as I can see from public opinion.
If at the end of the day, I do enter into a relationship with her, then I will go into it with a commitment second to none.

 

Its complicated, but I wouldn´t say impossible. Another thing that might be a problem is children

oh just saw this was already mentioned, sorry

 

Whatever you decide good luck too you. There have been some good points made here but we are not the ones that have to live with the decision, go with what you want based on what you know and don't let our opinions make you choose something you don't really want.

 

The main reason I created this thread was to see what other peoples thoughts and experiences were.

Thank you to all that have replied. I'm going to have to take this day by day and see what happens - as I say, we are friends at the moment but things are moving in the relationship direction.

 

Yes. Sometimes it can be 10 to 20....

[YOUTUBE]SRexZ4SAe6s[/YOUTUBE]

 

How old are you again, 49? I would suggest you answer whatever questions you have pretty sharpish pal.

M

 

I have often said to friends to 'let things happen' and 'not to assume that something is going to happen'. I believe it's important to start with a foundation of friendship and, maybe, build from there. Age can be overcome if both parties are singing from the same hymn sheet, and other buzz-phrases.

I do think that you will have to be prepared to allow her to grow into her own adult, and be aware that the adult-she might want different things out of life than the 'nearly-adult-she'. In my opinion, 18 year olds thrive on drama, falling out with friends over the silliest things, getting drunk and flashing their draws...blossoming adult-hood is like that, and uni only compounds it.

And I think that she will have to be prepared to accept you as an adult in your own right; you might prefer nights in, in front of the telly, romantic walks in the park, that kinda thing; opposed to her grand plans of maybe going to a gig, getting high/drunk/stoned/all of the above, weekend-long benders.

Personally, I couldn't put up with the bloody drama and probably end up grounding them until they learnt some propah respect :laughing:

 

Wise words indeed.

 

I agree! Just like EVERY relationship, you need to communicate. Talk to her about your doubts, listen to her doubts. Start as friends, see where it goes. If you throw away this chance because of a number, you may regret it. It may have been something great. Or maybe something horrendous. Just like any relationship. You'll never know unless you try it. I've seen many 15+ age gaps work out with no problems.

 

I think it's nice to say that age is just a number or you're only as old as you feel, but there's a lot more to it.

My exgf was 10 years younger than I (she was 21, I was 31) and we got along just fine but we did run to problems with our age difference. She had completely different memories from her childhood and she called movies from the 80's/90's old and pretty much put them on the same level as movies from the 50's. Those were some of the more humorous differences but the others dealing with experience in life made a huge difference to me. I felt like I was raising her in a way. She got really frustrated with me as well because she felt I was treating her like a child. I guess I was but I just couldn't sit back and let her fail.

So my point is that big age differences definitely had a negative impact for me and ultimately broke us up. If you choose to try, good luck.

 

Love this response... "common interests" ? LOL.. Doubtful is right.

 

I'm 45, my gf is 24 and we get along just fine. It helps that I'm very daft and she has and old head on her shoulders. I'm the dominant one in the bedroom but it's equal in every other respect.

 

I think you shouldn't be walking down the aisle before you have even gotten to know her. I wouldn't see any problem with dating her and keep any thought of marriage out of your mind until you have time to see if you even feel the same way in five years.

 

While I don't think that age is a "deal breaker" of relationships, it certainly is a big hurdle to overcome.

One of the biggest problems is 'life experiences'. You have lived on your own for sometime. She has probably never had to deal with running a household, bills, etc. You have lived through changing political, social, economic times. She has barely gotten through high school. There are just so many topics that your experience will not match up with hers.

Then there is the issue of friends and family. Are you going to be comfortable going to basically a "frat party"? Or will she feel OK going to a friends retirement party? What will your respective family members say? Now maybe the relationship is so new that you both don't care what other people say, but at some point these issues will come up.

Children I feel is the biggest potential pitfall. She may not want them now, (most 18 year olds I would hope don't), but in 10 years???? Do you want to be a new father at 59? 65?


Having said all that.....
I think if you are having fun, who cares what anyone says? Will this relationship last forever? Maybe/ maybe not, but if you are both going into it with your eyes open, Have a great time!