I'm a sad, depressed, and lonely man. Won't someone please help me?!?!

My woman left me.
She took my car with her as she left.
I couldn't go to work so I lost my job.
All my youthful handsomeness has left me. I'm now too ugly to be able to get another woman.
It wouldn't matter anyway if I did find a woman. I couldn't please her, because I'm impotent.
And to top it all off my best (and only) friend in the world just died today.
My dog Rover.

 

:mrgreen:

 

lmfao well your up shit creek without a paddle.

 

Oh Joe.

 

What goes around comes around I guess Joe.

 

Just think,Things could get worse!

 

Click here for what I believe to be a long, drawn out, much less funnier version of this thread.
If you click and read it I think that it would be very educational for you.
You'll learn how my warped mind thinks, for example. :mrgreen:

 

dude! this sounds like a country song

 

Wow You Suck At Life

 

Joe, no matter what you think you still got the looks.

 

I thought you were playing off something You wiley dog you.

 

Really nice pot shot Joe.

 

yea, this is a little petty. i mean, it was kinda funny, but more petty than funny.

 

It's only petty until you realize that at this point AIC is just asking for it. And I was one of the people that tried to give him advice.

-S-

 

yea i guess youre right. i keep trying to give him advice and get him looking a little more optimistically at life, but it seems to have failed. well... i guess you're right, but he's depressed and i still feel bad for him. i used to be like that and now im not. so i guess what im saying is that i feel empathy towards AIC, as well i have a fair amount of pity for him.

 

He doesn't want it, he's happy in his misery. If a girl actually did make a pass at him, he'd shoot her down. He deludes himself that his problems are other peoples' misconceptions or preconceived notions or their attitudes, not his. So he builds a nice little box for himself and believes that it's others that put him in there and there's nothing he can do about it. He's the victim. In his mind, anyway.

-S-

 

loser

 

Ok, Joe, just stop listening to country music. Your life's turning into one of those crappy songs.

 

Count your blessings and proclaim your freedom.

That was the best damn thing that ever happened to me in life. I'm happier now that I've ever been before.

I really do feel sorry for the next SOB she marries.