The first few times I sucked dick or got fucked up the ass, I felt dirty and ashamed of my life, I am a man and doing these acts was not normal, but once I reached the point of acceptance within my soul, that feeling ended. That part of me has long since gone on holidays and glad.

 

No I do not have any guilt towards past nor am I ashamed of my kink, fetishes and or tastes. However, to me, it is something that I do keep closely guarded and not because I give a shit what people think. Its because people are judgemental a which in turn can lead to exclusion, expulsion, bad press... and so on. That to me doesnt reflect guilt. Its just "nonya"

 

@Sweetpassion you know me and I'm sure are well aware of my years of cheating due to my wife's own guilt which pushed her to begin cutting me off slowly 6 months after we were married, we had already been together for one and a half years through a non sexual dating and engagement. Much of it derived from the guilt (which I wouldn't find out till many years later) of how she'd been raised strictly Catholic that those guilty feelings that any form of pleasure could bring about remorse are quite real. However even though my years of infidelity had passed and all these emotions about her guilt couldn't be shared, till our marriage was in jeopardy and my frustration that she'd let me cheat initially three times came to a head after years of trying to get to the root of the problem.

I'd always had my suspicions that there was a feeling of shame on her part for indulging in the variety of sexual acts we'd practiced and enjoying them so much that she excused herself from those feelings at that moment in an effort to please me (or that's what she told herself.) It wasn't till I demanded the truth that things began to change for the better and unfortunately for you, you will need to someday face them in your own way on your own time even if only for your sanity and feeling complete. My wife let her shame and guilt build quietly in denial even though she had a husband willing to help her, as far as your mate I'm not sure you'll get the same reception that's why I say to deal with it and embrace your feelings rather then letting them make you feel worse. It's the best advice I can give you without knowing the specifics, take care beautiful.

 

I have never felt guilty over my sexuality or anything that I have done sexually in real life. But I do have some fantasies that are really out there. I do find myself feeling a bit guilty for having them. I get really turned on when I think about them or read stories involving them or when I am talking about them with some kindred spirits over here. I don't think I will be able to share it with even the closest of my friends for fear of being judged.

 

I think feelings of guilt are probably a good thing, they act as a Checkpoint for us, the question mark over our behaviour without which we would just be a complete 'Shit'

I try not to beat myself up over what I have done, not what I might do. I have done a couple of things that feel slightly icky in retrospect, I have also done some stuff that could be guilt making but fact was they were fucking awesome experiences and I believe the phrase:

'Better regret the things you have done than the things you havent' holds true...well mostly in any case

 

A couple of nights I'd like to forget and if you remind I'll deny it. Haha. But no, it's part of experiencing.

 

Being judged is something we all fear! However you should cast a critical eye over those doing the judging!

thinskin

 

The people who should feel guilty are those that will no longer have sex with their spouse, their mate. That's where real guilt is appropriate and needed. I'd sure like to know what they're thinking. I'd sure like to read their explanation of why they have decided to quit having sex with their husband or wife. Probably no one on this forum who is like that though.

 

Sweet Thing, when it cums to uninhibited sex and pleasure, anything goes! I would never judge anyone for following their desires.

 

Well that is something I'm not guilty of. Even when things aren't going well in my relationship i never deny him sex. That's just not right. Not in my eyes anyway.

 

Hun this life is filled with judgemental people lately. I try to not be one of them.

 

That's funny we all have things we would like to deny.

 

Thanks, i kind of agree with you. I really don't regret the things I've done in some ways. Which makes me feel even worse. Lol you have all been so kind to me on this thread. Thanks hun.

 

So why attach so much importance to the judgmental people?

Most of them envy your free spirit. You should pity them not feel guilty!

thinskin

 

I too have horrible things i fantasize about. I think if everyone was honest we all have things that run through our minds that excite us. That don't seem appropriate.

 

Aaawww thank you for this. Your right maybe i shouldn't let them concern me like i do.

 

Your wife is a very lucky woman. To have a man that only wants her to feel good about the person she is. It's to bad she doesn't try harder to meet your needs. It's all about compromising. I do believe that. Thanks for the inspiring words you wrote.

 

I feel guilt sometimes, I used to feel it a lot more... I think a lot has to do with our culture and sex being bad and dirty and wrong... We've been conditioned to hide our desires, especially if they are desires that stray from the norm...

 

That's like when before I got married, my future sister in law tried to give me some marriage advice. Even though she was on her 3rd marriage.

 

Haha yes, everyone knows everything. When really they don't. Lol