While I was working towards my nursing degree, in an ironic twist, I worked a security gig. One of my co=workers shared a story with me.

He and some "20 something" pals went out drinking. They ran into another group where some of the first group knew some of the second. They all went drinking. Pairing up soon began. While walking from one bar to another they detoured to a pathway along a canal. Well-practiced passions soon ensued.

Half dressed and thoroughly engaged, they did not see the ambush that was about to occur. Suddenly, out of the brush, a demon in the shape of a goose came flashing out at them. Cries of the startled boot knockers and the raging banshee of a goose possessed shattered the night. People ran laughing and crying in different directions.

Unfortunately, the girl was of larger proportions was not necessarily nimble and the goose found its prey. The goose set upon her and showed no mercy as it bit and pecked at her neck and shoulders. Then, a hero arose from the misty night.

Her paramour from moments earlier reappeared and with the cheering support of his friends, he began punching at the goose. In the process of serving justice to this vile creature, he accidentally knocked down the fair damsel.

Again, laughter pealed throughout the cool evening air.

Although both parties were quite inebriated, they both were able to quell the attack from the feathered monstrosity and rejoined their group.

The story....does not end here.

The group proceeded to the bar where drinking and tales of modern day chivalry were recounted and celebrated. Lustful urges resumed. Two by two, the couples drifted out of the bar and into the humid night to places unknown for more in depth interludes.

Our hero and his fair damsel headed back to his car. However, lust soon overcame them and they secreted themselves along the canal banks and were soon intertwined. Then, Fate intervened.

It is unknown whether they were followed or if serendipity brought them together but the revenge of the goose was now at hand and revenge would be swift.

Our hero was attacked from behind, as it were, and goose attacked the testicles. The yelp of pain was heard throughout the canal path. Legs, buttocks and bits were assailed much to the dismay of our hero. He rolled off his beloved, cradled his shrinking manhood, scooped up his clothes and ran off into the night with both wounded pride and genitals. The fair maiden, too, was attacked but her hero had waddled off into the night and her fate is unknown.