OK, so my girlfriend and I both had sex for our first times not too long ago. We have done it 7-9 times now. The first time, we simultaneously had orgasms, and I didn't feel bad about it because it was my first time, and I was glad she got something out of it.

The second time, she had THREE orgasms, then the next she had FOUR.
After that, she has either had 0 or barely had 1. She says it feels like I am not as into it, and I'm not lasting more than 5 minutes.

Can it be because I am tired? We had sex like 4 times over spring break, but now its only on weekends.

Can you please help me, I feel like shit because I can't get my girlfriend an orgasm.

 

Is this premature ejaculation? If so, how do I fix it?

 

This is the same as the pm you sent me.

It is hard to tell from what you have said, more details would be nice.

If you are not putting as much into the sex, then it would be normal for her not to get as much out of it.

If she isn't getting as much out of it because you are only lasting 5 minutes, the yes, it could be premature ejaculation. There are many ways to help it. You can try to focus your mind on other things or change positions more often. Are you wearing a condom?

 

Hmm... well it was both of our first times, and I kind of expected me to be short. It was like 10 minutes long or something, and she had an orgasm about the same time I did. I was pretty happy. The next night, I lasted about 30 minutes long, and she had 3. The next night, about the same time, but she had 4 orgasms. Ever since then it has only been 1 or none.
And I am just getting shorter. Afterwards I practically fall asleep right away also. Is it just something like being too tired and not getting enough sleep?
When I masturbated during the day, I was fine. Plus, I looked up some stuff for premature ejaculation, and tried one out. It seems to work. So I'm looking forward to friday. I just hope I don't disappoint her again.

 

Stress. Can't push stress too far, it'll cause you to blow your load. Sex is a very .. dare I say.. casual thing. Only do it when you're relaxed, have time, and are willing to put some effort into it. Remember, it's about fun! Stimulate her for longer, then put your penis in. Just have some fun.

 

are you really getting into it? And are you getting her into it? Foreplay is your friend. Make sure that she is worked up and hot before you start. Also, letting her have at least one orgasm before sex can help too. Are you trying different positions or just one?

It is normal for guys to be very tired and fall asleep after sex. As long as you are getting a good nights sleep I can't see that as being the problem.

Glad you found something that worked.

and, like has been mentioned, being under any other stress at the time can make it worse.

 

Relax and don't be so objective about it. Your counting off orgasms like a tick list. Do what feels right and see how it goes, you'll find yourself with a better performance and longer lasting due to less stress (your not thinking oh my god she's only had 2.465565 orgasms so far) As said before foreplay is your friend, get her nice and worked up before you have sex.

Enjoy it.

 

Thanks

OK. I hope I'm going to do OK tonight. It just scared the hell out of me when I stopped being able to make her happy. She keeps claiming it is not a big deal, but all the same, it makes me feel bad.

We usually only do one position, and when we tried another, it just got me off faster.

 

Then keep trying until you find one that doesn't

 

Have you tried cowgirl - her on top? That was she can almost grind her clit against you, using a rubbing motion that'll get her off while not easily bringing you to orgasm.

My gf and I had the same thing. When we started, I'd last for ages just in missionary, and I think her record was something like about 8 orgasms. Then I started to last for less time, and her orgasm count would go down, but she said they were stronger, more fulfilling orgasms.

Our sexual strategy these days is usually along the lines of: I go down on her, bring her off, then a bit of missionary until we switch to her on top, she gets off to her heart's content, then more missionary or maybe doggy. Another one she likes is if she's lying on her stomach and I'm penetrating her from behind, lying on top of her. This way you can get penetration that's not hugely deep but presses right on her G-spot, and you can slip a hand underneath her against her clit to give her something to grind against.

Though, for me this can be a bit touch and go - sometimes I can last for ages, but sometimes as she gets more into it and gets more active, it brings me off just as she's having fun, which kinda ruins it a bit haha!

Other options - have you tried those condoms that have a small slightly numbing gel in them to slightly dull the sensation to your penis? They're supposed to make you last longer.

Foreplay is definately the key. The more you get her worked up before you have sex, the easier she'll orgasm. Bringing her off before penetration actually starts is also good, means she's looser, more lubricated, and it'll feel better for her.

Good luck mate.

 

Bad case of performance anxiety on the part of both of you. Just relax and things will fall into place. And if they don't, maybe you're just getting bored with each other.

 

For a 19-year-old, you have marvelous untapped potential.

 

try it doggy style, and rub her clit as your fucking her. usually works every time. good luck.

 

Relax - you're doing great to be giving a girl lotsa orgasms that early in her sex life. Foreplay. Foreplay. Foreplay. Not just to get her off, but because you should enjoy doing it for her. A lot of women can't have orgasms, so I suspect your GF is pretty happy, and not too worried about it. Talk to her! Foreplay! Oh, and experiment! The male orgasm casuse a release of a chemical called Serotonin into the blood stream - makes us sleepy. Not rude, just natural. Cheers.

 

Kimi! Why thank you! I think I may love you!

Woo, my first compliment from Kimi... now I really know I belong!