Okay I hope it's okay to come here and ask about this, I didn't know where else to go.

I'm a pretty intelligent person, obviously much different in real life than I am online. But I never defend "cyber sex" or "roleplays online" when having discussions in real life, because when I think about it, it's kind of stupid, nevertheless, I still do it a few times a week over here or MSN. It's not only that, but the things I roleplay about might be considered sick or violent amongst other things, certainly acts in which I would never ever commit in real life, or like to receive. That's what I don't understand. I don't like being turned on by this thoughts, but I do, and it's not who I am, because I'd never think of doing these things in real life, yet I can't help myself when I really want to masturbate, instead of using dirty videos, I come on here and roleplay.

I don't want to anymore, but it seems I have some fixation with it. What do I do please?

 

Hmmmm, maybe keep cybering even though YOU came!!!!

 

There are 3 options: 4 if you want to be morbid.

1) Find religion and abandon your obsession with the online world.
2) Ignore your obsession and try to live out your life. Become obsessed with something else more positive. For example - finding the love of your life, working for non profits like donating your time to food shelters, etc.
3) Seek professional sexual counseling. Big metro cities usually have the best resources for this. Don't go to a regular counselor. You will be labeled as a sexual deviant and treated harshly.

None of these options are easy to do. If you are serious, then take definitive steps toward improving yourself. Words are easy. Actions are harder. The only person who can help yourself is you. Now take control and do something.

Best of luck to you.

 

Angry?

DOn't take your anger out on us because of an idiot

:rose:

 

Calm down. It was a power cut, dear.

Thanks for the advice, I really appreciate it. I'm going to try my hardest with number 2.

 

I have never understood the appeal of cybering. I find that, inevitably, people never want what they say they want.

 

I know how you feel, TC. I find cybering stupid and silly, but still sometimes do it. I love to roleplay, and my fantasies aren't really socially acceptable either (which is fine because I could NEVER EVER act on them in real life, and wouldn't want to).

However, I guess it's probably different for you a little. As a male, it's fairly easy to stop cyber-sex, because virtually no women do it. Inevitably, I'll start up a roleplay with someone, and it'll take me about 3 minutes to discover it's a man, pretending to be a woman.

Actually, I'd love to find a female who likes Roleplay and would be my MSN buddy. Not propositioning anyone, just saying...

 

Post your password. It won't take long to get banned. Seriously, I do the same thing with the roleplays. To me, online roleplay is like a live romance novel and you actually get to interact with the characters.

 

Possible addictive reactive.

Hi alexi_,

I am a Scorpio, and as such there is a dark foreboding part of my psyche. I have literally walked into the darkest places of my mind.

When I was younger the intensity of my internal sexual nature was like pure fire, but I kept it there, locked away, hidden like a sickening scar.

I too would never embark on anything that has taken place in my mind's eye. During those electrifying dimensions I was not who I am in my heart and nature; instead it was my ego-self that was being allowed to express in my imagination.

As I matured I found that I was so drawn to pornography. I was literally addicted to it. Then I found sex and was able to do some incredible 'safe' roleplaying, with some incredible people. Later, as I find myself in my middle age I am not that indulgent! But pornography and my desire to explore this 'fire' deeper enabled me to release it from my ego; my sensitivity to it began to level enough that I was now seeing a more beautiful, more rewarding exchange, perhaps even a bit vanilla in nature. A simpler, more tender experience seems to be drawing me.

I have been very active, daily actually LOL, but I found out that by allowing myself the opportunity to explore and expand, as I did, that I slowly did 'desensitize' that part of me that was frightened. The part that felt the shame or perhaps the part that makes a person feel ugly for thinking such things.

I am just now embarking on a new path. One where the parameters are changing. No matter how dark the darkest places are in my psyche, I have found a peace within knowing that within me I carry a Light--be it my soul, or perhaps my essence of Lovingness. The places we speak of can be visited just simply by taking the role and exploring. What eventually will happen is that you will become less overwhelmed by it and you will begin to paint a canvas of greater possibilities.

I often think that it was Societal Conditioning and Indoctrinations (our Parents, or our peers, tv) that put the thought that I was sick and disgusting into my mind. Maybe I was born this way.

By breaking these misconceptions I am happy to explore safely without the fear; I am after all a very imaginative person--an Artist.

Huggs and Kisses , I wish you well on your journey. If you feel you need to lock that closet, it will be there when you are ready. It is never too late to Free yourself and let go of all these worries and thoughts. There is a Light inside of you too my friend, one that is everlasting and no amount of darkness can take that from you.

Love, Ron

 

so wait....you are afraid becuase some of the stuff you do when you cyber, is stuff you wouldn't want to do in real life... hmm...

mate, have you SEEN the amount of threads made by women with rape fantasies?

its OK to be turned on by that, you are not some genetic sexual predator, enjoy it and stop being oppressed by people who tell you its wrong to think about things.

just forget about feeling bad about it okay? seriously, I have an unbirth fetish, now do you think I prowl the streets looking for women to climb into? XD. its just cyber, enjoy it, don't worry, be happy.

and to the guy who said he thinks cybering is stupid, but does it now and again. -1000 smartness for you.

 

and to the guy who said he thinks cybering is stupid, but does it now and again. -1000 smartness for you.[/QUOTE]

Screw you, pal. You never get lonely?

 

embrace your sexuality. Fantasies are normal and healthy I have many that would never happen in real life.

 

I know you're all so right, but it doesn't stop bothering me. It shouldn't, but it does. I suffer from mild depression and BDD too, so I hate having this on top of that.

 

Maybe go talk with a counsellor for your issues

 

Well you can do one of two things...

1. Embrace your deepest desires like some/most of us have, and try to engage in your fantasies in real life. You may not like it after doing it in real life instead of roleplay where the idea is exciting. Our desires are difficult to control.

2. Throw your desires/fantasies in your closet with everything else you don't want to remember, and hide it. This might be more difficult than embracing your desires, because it's human nature to want something you can't have.

By the way just because I'm a curious person... What fantasies/desires are you wanting to hide? You can say it in here or PM it to me if you wish or just not at all.

 

Thanks for the kind words everyone, but I think it's probably best if I left this site. I'm going to try stop watching porn too, because it seems to be these two things that tempt me the most. Bye everyone.

 

masturbate and enjoy porn

 

No worries, be happy.

Okay, first off, you are your own person, and only you can decide what you do.
Secondly, that is the great about the internet, the fact the you can live out your most dangerous or perverse sexual fantasies.
It doesn't mean you're wrong in the head, or that you're a horrible person, it's just something you like...
I occasionally do the whole cyber sex thing, but sometimes, I find that it's better to be an in person thing.
Physical.
But if you get to where you want to go by doing cyber, who says its bad.
And as long as someone is on the other end to receive your so called twisted fantasies well then i guess you have nothing to worry about.

 

what is so bad about your cybering fantasies

 

I think a lot of people have dark fantasies they wouldn't speak of or do, what's the big deal?