Hi all, I'm thinking about having anal sex with my guy, and I've never had anal before. Can someone clue me in on the whole process, please - how to do it clean (ie no shit), how to lube, what's a good lube to use, the best (easiest) position, and anything else I mightn't have thought of? I really want to try this, but have no idea what to do!

Thanks so much,
Lezzy.

 

Well my gf isn't keen on the whole anal thing and I'm not going to push her but first of all well done for trying it anyway.

The whole "shit thing" first of all is solved by a bath. Just have a bath and sponge urself down there. The warm water will go inside you and clean you out so you'll have no problems there. Alternatively use a powerful shower and aim the showerhead up your arse. What comes out may not be pretty, but its like a mini colostomy.

As for getting started, make sure and use lots of lube. Not vaseline or anything like that. Buy waterbased lube - Durex make great lubes now, but theres loads of others out there - and take it very slowly. If he goes straight for it and ploughs into you, its gonna hurt, and theres the chance he mite "rip" your anal wall (sounds nasty but it has to be said)

As for positions, I'd say try the one that would let the least amount of him inside you first - ie doggystyle may not be the easiest to start off with becuase he may have the tendency to go the whole 9 yards into you (I know I would lol)

Maybe sit on his penis - lower yourself onto him slowly. NB: One of the most important things you can do though would be to use lots of good waterbased lube

Oh also: Never ever let him put his cock in your ass and then your pussy - bacteria from your anus can harm you if you get them in your vagina - I learnt that from Seamour Butts and a health programme :mrgreen:

Hope that helps you a bit

 

God I could write a book!

To be clean I recommend an enema. Be as elaboate as you'd like. Full blown enemas to a quick douche can clean you out. Shower afterwards so you're clean inside and out. If you're not feeling good inside that day, pick a different day. If you're not comfortable, don't even bother trying.

As for technique - take your index finger and curl it up to your hand and hold it with your thumb. Ok, this is your rosebud. Now take your other finger and try and push it through; it meets lots of resistance, right? Ok, now take the pad of your finger and put it on your rosebud. Apply pressure with the pad and it should open your finger much more easily. That's how you A) apply lube and B) get yourself ready to have someone put something there. When loosening your own ass, one finger in and out, then two. Three if you can manage it and pull on the sides of your sphincter to loosen it up. Be gentle, it's not a race.

Position - I prefer getting down on my knees, shoulders to the floor (a pillow is good here but I prefer not to use one), and crossing my ankles. It offers my partner the best angle into me and frees up my hands to either pull my cheeks wider if needed or play with myself. If this is your first time and you have long legs, you can try straddling your partner so you have all the control but be on your knees when you try that, not your feet.

I use Astroglide. Lots of Astroglide. Once he's in, if it hurts, pull out, and pause a moment to relube your partner (and give yourself a moment before you go again).

Have fun!!

Love Always,
ixi

 

So I (a female) totally disagree with most of what Neon said. Ok, first, DON'T use the shower hose for an enema! That can do serious damage. The amount of "shit" that he'll get on his penis is minimal at most but if you insist on being "clean" use a store bought enema (I'm cheap and I just buy douche but depending on the brand they can be a bit uncomfortable to pull out). Pour out the chemicals they come with and use warm water (or warm water and soap). Do this several hours before sex because you're going to feel like you have to shit for quite a while. And it takes a while for all that liquid to actually make its way out.

As far as getting started...start with one finger. As he (or you) pushes it into you (preferably with a condom on it) push against him like you're taking a shit. This opens your hole and allows him to move in easier. Once you're comfortable with one finger try two then three. Once you can get 3 inside (assuming he has an average penis) you should be ready to try him.

I'm going to be very repeatitive right now. USE LOTS OF LUBE. USE LOTS OF LUBE. USE LOTS OF LUBE. USE LOTS OF LUBE. USE LOTS OF LUBE. USE LOTS OF LUBE. USE LOTS OF LUBE. USE LOTS OF LUBE. USE LOTS OF LUBE. USE LOTS OF LUBE. USE LOTS OF LUBE. USE LOTS OF LUBE.
Not just with his cock but with his finger too. This allows him to get some lube inside you before he goes plunging in and it makes it a HELL of a lot easier.

We me and my bf started out I liked doggie style. This gave him a good angle for penetration but allowed me the ability to pull away if needed (and trust me...it can be needed). You need to be sure you're comfortable with this guy. You need to know, going into this, that if you say STOP! WAIT! SLOW DOWN! EASY! He's going to listen to you. I'm not gonna lie. This is gonna hurt. But it shouldn't hurt too much if done properly. And you need to feel comfortable that he's not gonna get "fuck happy" and not listen to your needs. Because the minute you don't feel safe and comfortable you're going to tense up (as will your ass) and it'll hurt that much more. Personally I don't think lowering yourself onto him is a good idea because I imagine your legs are going to get extremely tired before you've even got half of him in. That's why we chose doggie. You're both in (fairly) comfortable positions and you shouldn't have any problems.

Finally, make sure you're comfortable with the idea of taking control. Don't just let him plow into you. YOU need to set the pace and take it as slow as you need to. Just make sure you both understand that you're the one in control.

It'll take a few tries before you're perfectly comfortable with it. As long as you take it easy you shouldn't get turned off by the pain or anything. The stopping and starting might kill the mood a bit but your ass with thank you.

And one thing Neon and I agree on is DO NOT let him go in your vag after anal penetration. Your pussy is a warm moist hole...breeding ground for bacteria. There's a delicate balance going on in your pussy. Never introduce things to it that aren't clean.

 

and might I add that you should run a search on the forum for Anal (in sexuality). There have been a LOT of threads with a LOT of good advice.

 

Meh, the old showerhead up the arse works fine. Plus if you stick it far enough up there and then turn off the shower while its in your ass, then take it out, you can leave a little suprise for your housemates when they have a shower...suprise! shit shower!

yea listen to snoochies tho, she seems to know better than I do. I'm not being sarcastic - she does seem to have more experience than me :mrgreen:

 

Lots of good advice here, we use the tube of KY and squirt some up inside the anus, It takes some streatching to get comfortable. and the ass goes back into shape in a few days, so may have to start over withthe stretch process, we use a small dildo at first, one that is comfortable,, then a little bigger, then one slightly bigger the the male.. I also stress lots of lube, Before and During. We love double penetration, cock in the ass and a small dildo in the pussy... Easier if the cock goes in first...