I am Satan and this is my story



Call me Ishmael. Well, maybe not. But how about Genghis Khan.

Caligula. Mengele. Bin Laden. Robespierre. Atilla the Hun.

I've been them all, and many others. I've lived a thousand lifetimes since the fool Adam and his wife were banished from the Garden of Eden by Him. I've caused countless deaths, unimaginable suffering, and have simply been the bane of humanity. If I were a man I would have been driven insane by humanity's cries for mercy.

Yes, I am Abaddon, and Beelzebub, the Destroyer, Lucifer, the Prince of Darkness (I particularly like that one), the Father of all Lies, Satan and the Antichrist.

But you know, it wasn't always that way. You would be surprised to hear the story of treachery, of backstabbing, of the politics that got me to where I am now. Most don't want to hear it. They read a book by its cover. "Satan?" and then they run off in a panic.

Since time is running short for humanity, what with Him getting ready to make another appearance, let me go ahead and put this story out there so that those of you with an open mind can have a glimpse into what took place oh so many, many years ago.

First, let me explain the phrase "Heaven and Earth" because there's a lot of confusion. It's one and the same. It is. The phrase "fallen angel" doesn't mean that an angel literally fell from a height physically, rather, it's metaphysical. It's a fall from grace, not a mileage thing. Heaven and Earth reside on the same physical plane. Angels walk among you, just as outcasts like I mingle too.

Second, there's even more confusion among you humans as to when the events in the Bible took place. You need to understand that time isn't a straight line. It curves and bends and is much more flexible than most give it credit. You've experienced deja vu, you know, where you'd swear that you'd done this before or had this conversation before? That's a time flexi, where your brain is shifting through the metaphysical temporarily. You're not supposed to remember all the different timelines in which you exist. If you did, you'd go insane. Like me.

The Bible is a book, and like many other great works from ancient times, there have been many, many translations. You played "telephone" as a kid. You'd sit in a circle and someone would whisper you a few sentences, and then you'd try and whisper the same to the next person, and by the time it got back to the first person it would be quite different. Well, hate to burst your bubble bub, but it's the same thing with the Bible. Oh sure, the concepts are pretty much accurate, good vs. evil, but it's much more of a metaphor than an accurate description of actual events. Take my word for it. Or don't. It doesn't matter. Life as you have it will radically change soon, and you'll see more clearly.

It was a warm Spring day. You humans had not even been created yet. That's another issue you have with time. Pete (you would know him as Simon Peter, or Saint Peter) got it pretty close when he said "with the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day." So after He created the Earth, angels inhabited it for many, many centuries. While He worked on crafting the landscape and then creating all of the animals and such, we enjoyed life.

It was a carefree life, full of fun and happiness and good fellowship and prayer and sunshine and love. Yes, this is me, Satan, speaking of love. I would not scoff at me at this point while I'm trying to explain lest I come and blight your family for generations.

It was during one of these carefree days that I came across a young female angel. Her name was Lillith. She was perfect in mind and body, and we played and chased and spent decades frolicking to and fro across the planet as children of a greater god would do. Except we were not children. We were His angels, untroubled by affairs of state.

Then one day, out of the blue, she came close to me and pressed her lips to mine.

Life changed.

We began to explore our sexuality. It was, in a single word, spectacular. The raw feelings one experienced as an angel...you see, we don't have "filters" like you humans. We feel the full brunt of love, shame, anger, despair, and so on. The vivacity of our unions were nothing short of cataclysmic. Can you possibly imagine the sensation of orgasm extending for days or even weeks? Probably not, but this is what it's like for us.

We lived a thousand lifetimes of passion in every day.

And then darkness appeared, and life changed once again.

No one knows where it came from, or how it came about. We were never told. Perhaps He thought it would be a way to challenge us, to make us better, at least that's one theory, the whole "free will" concept.

I'm not referring to darkness as in a lack of light. Oh no, that would have been nothing. This was an inner darkness that penetrated our very souls.

Lillith, the love of my life, the giver of light to my soul, inexplicably began a spiral toward the black depths of Hell. She committed the most vile, loathsome, heinous of crimes against God, and I was forced to watch her expulsion from Heaven. The anguish I felt was crushing. My despondence knew no bounds. I begged him to bring her back and punish me instead. I offered everything and He would not budge. I pleaded, I cajoled, I implored and supplicated. His heart was hardened.

I asked him to send me to her, to at least give me a chance to reform her, but again, all fell upon His deaf ears. Others approached Him on my behalf, but He refused them.

Finally, when the pressure was such that I no longer desired life itself, I snapped.

I decided that I'd had enough of Him and his righteousness and holier than thou (himself) attitude. I knew others were unhappy too and so I met with them and we plotted and discussed a celestial coup d'etat. At first I thought it would just be me and a few others but over time, many hundreds of angels sided with me.

In the end, it didn't matter. He was simply too powerful and had too many others siding with him. I did manage to get myself expelled from Heaven, but what I discovered, much to my utter dismay, was that while I still could roam the Earth, I was alone. I did not see another angel, did not see Lillith, did not see any of the other fallen angels. It was if we were in some isolation unit, and that was our punishment: eternal solitude.

Or maybe it was just me. Maybe that was just my own personal version of Hell that He cooked up for me. I really don't know. He's a vengeful person, that I'm sure of.

So was I wrong in what I did? I guess it is all perspective. Yes, the love of my life committed atrocities, but she could have been saved. She deserved a second chance. We deserved a second chance. And He snuffed it out.

Since then I've been on a bit of a rampage, you might say.

And I was 'round when Jesus Christ
Had his moment of doubt and pain
Made damn sure that Pilate
Washed his hands and sealed his fate

That fellow Jagger was pretty clever with his lyrics, and almost nailed it.

I see you. I see all of you. I can invade your dreams, or burrow into your thoughts. You aren't safe from me. No one is. Earth is my dominion. I will haunt this planet from now until the end. When tragedy strikes, look around, you will probably see me lurking in the shadows. I'll be the one looking around at others, drinking in their pain, reveling in their agony. I am the bringer of death, and I'm exceptionally good at my profession.

I am misery personified. You think you are having a bad day? Go ahead, call out to Him and see if He responds. More likely, I will hear you. And I will respond. I will help, help deepen your distress.

When you cheat on your spouse, I'm the one who helps you feel the twisting of the knife of regret. I'm the one who piles on the weight of overwhelming remorse when your spouse finds out.

The floods of 1931 in China that killed millions? I helped bring them about. The 2004 Tsunami? I triggered it. The 2001 terrorist attacks on the United States? I put the thoughts into the terrorist's minds. Earthquakes? Yes. World Wars? Absolutely. AIDS? You got it.

And yet I'm willing to stop.

I am.

I have but three demands, and then I will cease and desist.

First, I want Lillith, the love of my eternity, returned to me, so that she and I may live together forever.

Second, I want immunity from His wrath, now and forever. I will agree to never cause pain or suffering again.

And finally, I want the letter "e" stricken from the English language. Completely and irrevocably. Gone. Finite. Arrivederci.

Three simple things.

And you thought I was kidding.

Talk to Him. See what you can do.

Help me, help you.

It is, after all, the Christian thing to do, is it not? To help one who is in need of realignment. Is not my need righteous?

Blessed are they who are persecuted for the sake of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

I await the call.

Your faithful servant,

Satan

 

Oh bloody wow!

This is terrific. The concept is a little close to an obscure subplot in a couple of my past stories so I am particularily fascinated by this. Cleverly written with a nice mixture of menace and humour. Jolly good. As there is no descriptive sex that may cost it a few votes, but I applaud the author of this piece - short, sharp, witty and engrossing.

 

I'll be damn. I knew I met you before.

 

Good.

I'd have more to say, if I knew who wrote the damned thing.

So, good.

 

Super loved it! Whoever thought this was brilliant!

​

 

The good: Absolutely fantastic, thought filled, powerful, story. Well written with an attention to detail I loved. The bringing in of Lilith (one of my favorite legends) was phenomenal.

The Bad: I would have liked to see a bit more of the story of his fall. The war in heaven played a major role and should have been better spotlighted.

The ugly: Lilith, ah what can I say about that sultry freak of a woman. She was the first wife of Adam and was banished for refusing to submit to Adam's will. You could not have picked a more controversial figure from religious history.

 

Again I am amazed with the ability of the writers here to draw the reader into the story almost like he is taking part in the action. One almost feels sorry for Satan and the role he had to play. Another outstanding job by the writer of this story.

 

Wow - so different - so creative. This was another example of a very short story proving that good things can come in small packages. There must have been an incredible amount of research that went into this submission. Author, you are so talented. Thank you.

 

Whoa.

Okay. The short list just got longer.

The fact that there's no overt sex in this entry means nothing to me. Sex scenes would have ruined the flow of humorous menace that was the meat of this story. Talk about playing devil's advocate!

Whoever the writer is deserves great praise.

 

“I am Satan and This is my Story.”

But what is that story really? The title suggests a tell-all, but as we'll see, this story doesn’t tell all that much.

“You would be surprised to hear the story of treachery, of backstabbing, of the politics that got me to where I am now.”

Would we be? There’s not much in the way of treachery, backstabbing, or politics in this story. Some things are, perhaps, alluded to, but that’s the most we can say. We'll come back to this point later.

“She was perfect in mind and body, and we played and chased and spent decades frolicking to and fro across the planet as children of a greater god would do.”

Like what? What was so perfect about her? What did she say or do that was so enchanting? What did the narrator think or feel when they were together? Who was she, really, and why did she matter this much to him? This stuff matters, because this is what the story’s entire conflict hinges on. If we don’t understand this, we don’t understand anything.

Now, you may say, “Hey, what’s to explain, haven’t you ever been in love?” Okay, fair enough. But by that logic we could dispense with almost every part of storytelling that requires more than a sentence or two. This relationship basically is the entire story. The idea that Satan turned to evil out of love and heartbreak is the part of this narrative that’s new and unexpected. It should get more attention.

“I'm not referring to darkness as in a lack of light. Oh no, that would have been nothing. This was an inner darkness that penetrated our very souls.”

Well what in the world does that mean? Was he depressed? Was life no longer fun anymore? Was it, perhaps, that there had previously been no such thing as a negative emotion, and now that things like sadness and frustration and envy and even just boredom were being felt they were simply too much to bear? Or was it something bigger than that, something ineffable and cosmic that humans can’t really relate to? What’s happening in this scene? Why don’t we know?

I get that this story is written in a certain style and that it’s meant to be brief, to have a tone and voice that’s direct and compelling, and not to spend too much time on any one thing. That’s fine. But we can’t tell a story in a way that’s at the expense of the things that make up (or should make up) the story. If we don’t have an idea who Lilith is, or what the characters did together, or if we don't come to understand the emotions at work in more than just the most general sense of naming them, then this story isn’t really being told. Here’s an example of something in the story that worked very well:

“Then one day, out of the blue, she came close to me and pressed her lips to mine. Life changed.”

This is a strong bit of writing because it’s tangible. It’s a particular moment that we can imagine, relate to, even, in a way, feel, because everyone remembers a significant first kiss and the heady few seconds just after it. It’s also a strong character moment, because it creates sympathy. If you’ll pardon the term, it humanizes the narrator for a moment, and it does this by being specific instead of general. It’s still direct and it doesn’t belabor things and it doesn’t break us out of the narrator’s voice at all. It’s not complex. But it works.

“She committed the most vile, loathsome, heinous of crimes against God, and I was forced to watch her expulsion from Heaven.”

By now you probably know that I’m going to ask what in the world those heinous crimes could possibly have been. More importantly, this gives me some pause. In this story we assume that the devil became the devil because of tragic love. Okay, that works. But what’s Lilith’s problem? She apparently did a lot worse a lot earlier, and her motivation was…what, exactly? Some general, undefined inner darkness seems to be the only factor, but she wasn’t the only one even experiencing that. What made the difference? If the answer is “Nothing in particular,” or “It doesn’t really matter,” then why is this happening in the story at all? There’s no real value difference between the devil going bad just for the hell of it and Lilith doing the same first, so in a very real sense this undermines the story if we don't understand it.

“I knew others were unhappy too and so I met with them and we plotted and discussed a celestial coup d'etat. At first I thought it would just be me and a few others but over time, many hundreds of angels sided with me.”

This is the backstabbing and politics we were promised up front, but…well, where are they? We’re privy to nothing here. Again, you may say that most people understand this part of the narrative already, but back at the beginning we were promised something that would surprise us. This isn’t it. The love story is the only surprise, but we've already talked about the problems with that.

“And finally, I want the letter "e" stricken from the English language. Completely and irrevocably. Gone. Finite. Arrivederci.”

…why?

There are some clever and sometimes funny moments here and some ideas that have promise, but not a lot of substance.

 

So, now we have the Devil himself making an appearance. Interesting. And we're supposed to feel sorry for him? You make a compelling case for that, but of course, you don't know whether the above is true, or false. You don't even know if there is a Devil. In fact.............................never mind. I'm not going to get into a debate over whether there is a Devil or God himself.

On the plus side, it was inventive, different, and well-written. Whether or not you'll do well depends not only on the quality of other stories, but on the fact that most people are looking for sex in their sex stories, and you didn't deliver any sex. Plus you have the whole religion thing which could blow up in your face.

Good luck with this one!

 

On the plus side for me, at least, is the idea that the writer dared to enter a contest here with an asexual religion-based story. That shows cajones. Horse is absolutely correct. If votes were the point here, good luck.

Winning or losing isn't really the point. If this writer understands that, he/she should be proud of this entry.

 

Excellent use of this theme! Wait maybe one or two more (!!)

The Devil as an historical figure? Why the hell not. (pun intended even if not very good) Almost the whole time I had The Rolling Stones playing in my brain. ( Doot Dooo ) I was afraid when I saw this title that some might get upset, but after the read I can't see a good reason to. It is a simple telling of his side of the story. Thought the writing was superb, and enjoyed the read very much!

Another thanks to yet another writer for giving us an entry!

 

I enjoyed reading this story, but I agree with BlackRonin's assessment that there's not much story here. It almost feels like an introduction to a much longer story where the details are fleshed out. I would like to read that story.

 

one of the best narratives in the occult genre that i've read in a while

 

It is interesting the diversity of opinions that are being shared in the comments. They range from:

JayneyRedd: This is terrific...engrossing.
Minerva_x: Super loved it! Whoever thought this was brilliant!
Brootforce: Absolutely fantastic.
Redbeard1031: Outstanding job.
Ejls: You are so talented.
Wantsomefun: Whoever the writer is deserves great praise.
UncleB71: Thought the writing was superb.

to

BlackRonin: In summary...it sucked.

As a writer, you cannot please everyone. If you look at some of the best-selling books of the past decade, you'll see that there are critics who have panned them, yet, they still sell millions of copies and get made into highly profitable movies.

I think what that proves is that sometimes people "get" what you're writing about, and sometimes they just don't. There's no getting around that. There's no point in trying to convince detractors otherwise, rather, you simply nod your head politely, thank them for their time and assessment, and move on.

A closer in baseball is the relief pitcher who comes in at the end of the game to try and hold off the opposing team in the last inning. Typically it is a pressure-filled spot, and often times, the opposing team will be threatening to score and win the game. Most times good closers will prevail, but when they don't, when they get beat and lose, that's when they need to have a very short memory. They need to forget what happened and look at tomorrow as another opportunity to win one for the team.

A successful writer needs to have a closer mentality.

 

Whoops! The above should be credited to the author. This was not a statement from the CAW SOP.

 

I loved the use of language in this story. It was both dripping with venom and very sad. I also liked the way you took a big story and stripped it to it's bare essentials, since I've previously read a lot about the character and I tend to think Satan would be a man, or perhaps a creature of few words. By not physically describing Lilith you allowed the reader to fill in the blanks and make her the woman they dream of.

 

Bump