I have been with my husband for over 6 years but we were friends long before that. I have always loved him n remain faithful, but lately he has been very different and very distant. We fool around but dont have sex, he cant even cum unless he is watching porn. I feel like i am just a sex toy and no longer his wife. What can I do to get his attention.

 

The first thing I would do before anything else is talk to him, if you haven't. Make sure that he knows exactly how you're feeling about the situation. Don't dodge anything or leave any important details, tell him exactly what your marriage, or at least your sex life, is leading to currently. If you even tell him exactly what you just said here, then that's enough for him to know how you're feeling. If you jump into conclusions and do anything hasty, then you wouldn't be any more better than your husband. Once talking to him, he will definitely give his side of the situation to both defend himself and try to solve the situation. Having him doing that will give you hints of what needs to be done for this relationship to be fixed back to normal, at least for him to act normally again. That's one way to get his attention, to be upfront and both tell him your feelings and ask him his input for things to go back normally or even improve.

Another thaing you can do to get his attention his surprise him, do something unusual that will certainly catch his attention. If that's doing something sexual without having him being there at first and allow him to catch you, maybe that would turn him on and have him watch, since he can only cum to porn. Maybe because of that, he would become very excited just watching you and not doing anything to you. Or to make a new experience that the both of you would enjoy, you two could travel to a local sex shop and look for things that could spice things up in the bedroom.

 

Do u have whatsapp?
well here is my no...pls msg me....+919874703897

 

What do you mean by 'distant' and 'different' and what exactly makes you think that e cant cum without the help of porn... YOu say you fool around but dont have sex..Why exactly ?

There are too many unaswered questions in your post to answer just yet without knowing more

 

Ladys... us men are stupid.... we don't take hints....just tell us..really.

 

First off this isn't about getting his attention, you could slip on a hot outfit and get lucky but being married myself for over 28 years I didn't get into it to get lucky! You need (as many will say here) to get him to hear and pay attention to your needs with an explanation of his new attitude, out of kindness at first you may accept the usual bullshit of too tired, maybe later, it's not you it's me...all bullshit to put off the inevitable conversation that will lead to frustration without it.

There's no good answer that doesn't involve you demanding an explanation that can be the only way to a solution, if not time will make a solution that neither one of you will like I assure you. My timeline was 1 1/2 years of waiting for my virgin bride, 6 months after marriage our sex became aloof and riddled with excuses, at 8 months she had allowed me some leash which led to about 10 years of her avoidance and me taking mistresses. Contrary to belief with the supposed "all the pussy I was getting" I laid down the final note that we couldn't go on like this and we were in danger of done if she wasn't going to do something about it. It may have been what had to happen, but it wasn't all the fun it should've been and if you think it can't happen to you or him that's what I thought too.

 

Very true. And may i add if she starts going out of her way. Looking sexy for him. And trying all these new things to excite him. And he still don't act that into her. But yet gives her sex. She will feel even worse about herself. Your right she may get lucky.....but not be fulfilled and feel desired.

 

You are the same food every day. You are the dead end job. You are the same commercial you've seen 8 times in 6 hours, and the repetition is becoming neo nazi neuro torture rather than making you enjoy the experience or need to procure said business's services.

 

I feel the same way about my husband. I adore my Husband ( I make mistakes and working on things ) I joined all of these sites to learn dirty chat and ext... now I am lonely wanting the attention and emotion he puts into all these sites. I have a lot to offer, not in a bad way but I know my worth. How ever I find myself asking Why does he think so poor of me? I will say that My emotions can get everywhere due to medical issues lately but Its hard to get into sex with him. I had threesomes with him, outfits, love slapping, hand cuffs, dp, I also have a very high sex drive, watch porn, I am willing and act on most of it. If i don't listen to him or do something he( not be quite when he asks) does not like, he refuses kisses, hugs and sex. We had sex today finally after like 1 week and a couple of days. I was not going to refuse it i did my best to be in that moment but I could not give it my best due to this making me feel like a piece of shit. during all the time with no sex he is on kik , meet me, tumbler ext. no touching what so ever. I tell him the frequency is what is bothering me. as well as not including me in chat, if he will stop, wich he did for 2 days stop, tell me he will stop then starts back up and say it is my problem not his when i bring it up. I really don't know what else to do? I tell him that I am a person a women dont be so cold. this really hurts me and makes it hard to truly enjoy our sex. after sex today i felt like I should be happy he had sex with me but then that made me feel not important at all because I dont deserve that treatment and he swears I put it on my self and i am just complaining. I just want to feel more important to him then sexting, my feelings are not validated i just want them to mean something to him, not complaining. it really hurts, I am taking hits in my own self image due to fighting the image he paints of me. He may be to selfish to realize but honestly I do not know??

 

sorry took it about my issuses and a book , But as you can see I needed to vent.

 

Some times we can get lost.... day to day activities consume our life kids, work , cooking, cleaning, we loose our way. happened to me.... lucky we found our way back... before it was to late.