Ok so I've been married 13 ys sex is mediocre at that im into foreplay eating pussy asshole. Ive been patient talked to her bought toys sex games lingerie. She's just not biting. So I've been getting my spank on here just chatting w/people m/f swaping pics. So like an idiot I left my browser on she found got all pissed off. Is this cheating or not? And my excuse was if u would give me more sexual attention I wouldn't be here. now in know what u guys gonna say and no im not a shitty lay or small dick. No she's not cheating on me at all

 

After 13 years of marriage YOU know if its cheating or not.
The fact you were hiding what you were doing should answer your own question.

 

My wife knows I watch porn on here she has med.issues I'd don't want to cheat so it's a good compromise for us

 

Anything you have to hide or lie about is cheating. Plain and simple.

That being said, you should have told her directly what you were doing. Her being mad at you for masturbating, even if it was to pictures of real members on here shows me she is very very insecure of herself. Porn is porn, regardless if its the girl down the block or a mega fake pornstar. So she might be having major insecurities in herself amd thats what makes her shy away from sexual exploration with you.

My advice: Admit you were wrong for hiding it, and lying to her (lying by ommission is still a lie) and explain to her that as a man your hormones practically require variety, and/or new stimulation. Weather that stimulation be physical,visual,audio related or etc, and that you need to know a list of what bothers her and whay doesnt so that you can still get your spank on with out hurting her feelings. Dont ever try to make her feel bad about goving sexual attention because there may be more to it then you know, and stop trying to lay the blame at her feet by saying things like "if you had just fucked me" etc. Own up to what you did and assure her you not only wont do it again but that you want to make sure to correct the problem.

Good luck.

 

Get her to read your post here and ask her does she thinks your cheating

 

NOT CHEATING AT ALL.

Can't see how cruising a porn site is cheating, as long as you are not focused on specific individuals.

Most everyone requires some kind of sexual outlet. It sounds as if she has chosen the path for both of your lives and you are expected to obediently follow. If your relationship has seen a noticeable down trend in mutual sexual activity then as a participant in the relationship you are deserving of an explanation and a compromise. Surfing a porn site is a reasonable outlet and compromise. As long as you aren't getting too personal.

Only thing you are guilty of is not telling wifey what you were doing and I personally dont see that as a big issue seeing as though you got downsized on the booty visits without being forewarned.

May end up being a nice little negotiating tool for a solution to the real problem.

 

Surfin porn and whackin it, I don't see that as cheating. Sometimes ya just gotta rub one out. Pic swapping and chatting with folks on the internet in a sexual manner, Id say she has every right to be upset.

 

If she thinks this is cheating I shudder to think what she would do if you ever actually touched another woman. This is definitey NOT cheating. Considering her reaction, there's an obvious reason for keeping it secret. Why look for trouble?

 

Look, the way you describe things here, she's not acting like a wife, but like a mother!

So, after 13 years, you should just think about the attitude of both of you...

Anyway, you're not the only one - I've met several men who act like kids in front of their wifes...

 

Considering I recently helped a 78 y/o man hide his porn from his wife, it may have something to do with age. (I taught him how to erase his browsing history).
The different ways people are raised can explain her reaction to different sexual adventures, or her reaction to porn.
I tend to agree with A-V, it's probably personal, she could be extremely self consious, and the way women are portrayed nowadays makes it very likely.
But porn has been around for thousands of years, men are designed to want to look at women, and even better if thier having sex. I think it's ...well, it's lying to herself if she thinks you're not going to watch it whether she likes it or not. Every relationship deals with it in thier own ways. Personally, I don't ask my husband what he's watching, and he doesn't ask what stories I read. All that matters is that it gets the job done, we both get our jollies, and we're happier for it.
I do think chatting with people, and trading pictures was definetly iffy, that's something she can declare no-go, because your involving other people, and possibly growing to care for them.

 

I hate to tell you this, but if your sex life is mediocre now after 13 years, it's only going to get WORSE!!! You may as well take up knitting now.

 

And make sure ASAP she hasn't stolen the hard drive out of your computer!!! And if she's not interested in sex, OF COURSE SHE ISN'T CHEATING ON YOU!!!

 

1) It's called "In private browsing" - easy to do
2) Guys look at porn. Any woman who doesn't know that is fooling herself.

 

Now!!! If the lady of that man finds out who's helped him, you'll have no chance to go to church on Sundays anymore!!!

 

I don't go to church. :rose: I truly believe it's unreasonable to expect a man not to watch porn, or read porn.

 

It's not for anybody reading this to decide whether or not playing around on this site constitutes cheating or even if you were justified in doing whatever you were doing before you were discovered. Only your wife knows how serious an infraction has been committed.(#1 Personally I always and only visit this website while in (inprivate browsing) and when I'm done I always delete my misc browsing history). (#2 No matter what I find myself discussing with any other visitors to this site I don't find myself feeling as if I'm doing or saying anything which is detrimental to the relationship I have with my wife. She's a major prude and she'd be absolutely furious if she knew what we usually discussing tween each other I mean after all Talk is Cheap, and that is one of the reasons that it is little more than fantasy. when I'm finished online I just log off and once again I'm as pure as a freshly driven virgin snow!

 

Lol, my Fiancee' used to get really pissed when she caught me on porn or checking out a girl. After a lot of talking about it and reassurance, she's now checking chicks out with me and posting nude pics online. Maybe you should try to get your wife into this stuff too?

 

my 2 cents

My wife and I went through a fallow period, after our second child was born. She'd been pregnant 3 times in 5 years at that point, had some complications, and just generally wasn't in the mood. I'd let her know that whenever (and I meant WHENEVER) she was ready, I would be, too. So in the meantime, I beat off. I didn't really hide it, nor did I broadcast it, just jerked it as needed and when opportunity arose.

One night, I was working on some homework, got distracted, and started surfin the porn. She happened to comme downstairs that night, saw what I was looking at, and, somewhat upset, asked me what I was looking at. I'm a terrible liar, and didn't feel I needed to lie, so I said I was looking at porn, getting ready to jerk off. She got bothered, the whole "I'm not enough for you" routine, all that. So I told her the truth, that at that point, no she wasn't enough. At times my balls got full, I needed release, and she wasn't providing. That I'd never cheat, never lie, but never stop being a dude who got hard ons and needed to cum. I also said that if I had pictures of her, I'd be much more likely to cum to those than some other strange.

Since then, our sex life has picked right back up, which is awesome (to the point where we're trying all kinds of new things, exploring the idea of adding a playmate, and she's given me a conditional greenlight to explore on my own when geography prevents us from being together, though I doubt I'll use it anytime soon). She knows I come here, that I still need to jerk off every now and then, and has provided me with some fun visual inspiration to help to that end (though of course I still like porn).

YMMV, but in this household, lieing is cheating and the truth tends to make everyone happier, including some fun fringe benefits.

 

Your answer is perfect. You and my husband are a lot alike. He uses pictures or videos of us/me instead of porn. In our relationship lying is cheating as well B knows he can have almost anything his heart or penis wants as long as he is up front open and honest with me. We are even one of the rare rock solid marraiges that can accept the other having feelings for someone else.

 

Of course it's cheating, you're hiding it from her, and even worse, it's not just porn, but you're exchanging pictures with other people, regardless of your sex life, she at least deserves the respect of having her opinion asked before her husband goes around showing his bits to various and sundry, would you not expect the same courtesy from her?