One time my wife and I were planning a hot night, I was running late to get home from work. Came in the door, my wife said I had 2 minutes to get a shower if I wanted to get laid. I rushed the shower and went upstairs. My wife started to nible and lick me. I didn't rinse all the soap off my sack. Ruined the whole night. She doesn't rush me anymore.

 

thats not so bad if thats your most embarassing moment!

I would have to say mine was when I accidentally farted when my SO at the time was going down on me...total mood wrecker!! And gross too...

 

CM, your right another mood wrecker. Aside from a case of whiskey dick a few times I guess I've been lucky

 

damn, that is a huge mood killer

I'll have to think of mine

 

Back in high school, my boyfriend and I had just finished, and were laying there naked basking in the glow, and his mom barges in! He frantically tried to cover me with the blanket, but I don't think it was fast enough. Needless to say, I was thankful she didn't want to talk to us about it..and I slunk out of there and didn't come back for a while!

 

And of course, every time you have that sound come from down there during sex...when air gets trapped (qweef? I dont know how its spelled). For some reason for me when that happens its totally mortifying. Or I just bust out laughing in the middle of sex!

 

yeah, it's totally normal but still embarrassing

 

i agree...i have had that happen to...the "queef" but thankfully, we're confortable enough with each other and been together longer that we just laugh it off now...its not embarassing anymore...

 

what the hell is whiskey dick?

 

either when you're so smashed you can't come

or you're so smashed you can't get hard

 

This should be moved under the "gas" thread. *giggling*

 

Me and the good lady were going at it under the covers one morning when our son - I think he was 6 at the time was disturbed by the noise and burst in to our room to ask if Mummy was ok because she was making so much noise.

Personally I couldn't think of a thing to say - the good lady as quick as a flash said that Mommy was having a nightmare and daddy was comforting her!

Also when we were first sleeping together - the mrs used to stay in my bedroom, and my catholic parents who didn't approve of sex before marriage, always asked her to bring her sleeping bag

Well we were lying naked on my bed, having just finished, and ruffled the sleeping bag a bit to pretend it had been used, when my Mum brings in a cuppa - calmly puts it down and then says "I don't think you need to worry about the sleeping bag anymore dear". This probably lost something in translation - you should have been there !

 

I have seen it called a vart in professional sex books for college courses.

 

My own

Leonora and I were upstairs in the furniture store by the mattress stack when I heard my former gf who took my virginity come in downstairs and ask: Is ZYZX here? The mutual friend of us all said: No he's gone down the street. She waited a while then left. My car was parked right outside the front door.

I was good and stiff when I heard her and in less than a second my dick shrunk to nothing. I laughed and said to Leonora, "Look at that" She was scared and said what should do?

I told her just duck down and be quiet, she'll leave in a minute. So #1 did and we continued to have a fine party on the mattresses.

 

Im sorry, I may have missed something here......you say your an 18y female yet you say here that "I was good and stiff" and "my dick shrunk..". Your covers blown, please change your personal details to MALE.

 

that sounds like the scene from Austin Powers...

 

My moment invloved farting as well.

My girlfriend at the time was riding me on the couch and for some reason I let the biggest one go (great timing for a fart wanting to come out). Well the first couple weeks after that she would ask me if I needed to fart before we would go at it.

 

Going at it while out parking, cops come make us get out of the back seat and stand beside the car buck ass naked. Then asked what we were doing? They were having a good time. The girl, well she never went out with me again

 

I thought you knew, I was telling his side of it. I was just frightened.

 

I will be honest and admit to being a two stroke joke. It was my first time with my then G/F who I was so in love with. Red hair green eyes and just so WOW.. everything is going good and then ..ooops...I wanted to fall off the bed into a black hole and dissappear forever. Luckily she was kind and things got back to normal and "longer " from then on.