Did you know you have a bear behind you

 

"57 Channels"

They watched the television. For the first time, it watched back. A great eye filled the screen, blinking now and then. What should we do, they wondered? Why is it watching? What does it want to see?

In the hollow light of the glowing screen, they began to make love. They thrashed back and forth on the sheets, fear preying on them as their bodies tangled together. The TV watched.

I hope this is what it wants to see, thought one of them. I wouldn't want it to decide there's nothing good on.

Because then it might turn us off.

 

"Twenty Two"


The four children were playing together on a warm spring day, when they decided to play ‘Hide and Seek’.

Mary volunteered to go first. She approached the old tree and asked her friends, “How high should I count?”

Tommy responded, “Count to twenty two.” The other children scattered, in search of a hiding place.

Mary leaned forward, against the tree. She cupped her hands over her eyes and began counting, “One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, seventeen, eighteen, nineteen, twenty, twenty one, twenty two….Ready or not, here I come!”

 

The Race

Take your marks.

David stands in his lane, six, and moves forward to get his start. He glances left, Simon. If he beats Simon the race is his-hasn’t yet.

“ Focus. Focus. Nail the start. Just me; no one else, straight ahead- only straight ahead,” he tells himself as he waits.

Get set

He’s up, tense, ready, ears pricked.

“Don’t break.”

He closes his eyes; start on the gun.

Bang

He surges forward but Simon’s ahead.

False start from lane five. You’re disqualified I’m sorry.

He looks. Simon is in tears.

Take your marks.

“Focus, start on the gun.”

 

"Come on, baby, you can do it for me," he said as he stroked her hair.

"I don't know...it's only our first date," she replied. "Besides, I've never done it before."

"Awww, come on, baby," he whined. He held his cock in one hand and tried to push her head down with the other. "Don't leave me with blue balls..."

"I...I don't know if I can," she replied, trying to push away.

"Well, your sister did," he told her.

"You bastard!" she shouted as she slapped him, then got out of the car.

 

Emergency Blow

"How did he end up in a coma?" the night nurse asked curiously.
"Oh, he was on a submarine, and they did one of those things where they surface really fast - he forgot to hang on and fell on the steel floor and cracked his head." The nurse administrator thought a moment. "Oh, they call it an emergency blow."
The night nurse fidgeted with a stain on her blouse. "Oh, that's it then," she giggled. "A couple of times during the night, he got real agitated and he was moaning 'Emergency blow! Emergency blow!' So I gave him one."