Before my sweety walked back into my life I was contemplating getting a puppy but got a pussy instead .

Anyway we started talking about maybe adding a munchkin to our lives and there are so many babies that need someone to love them but is it fair to the child to have such older parents ???

 

Think about it...unless you're in great health, no, I don't think it's fair...

 

I can only speak for myself.

Having raised three kids, now grown-ups, and proud grandparents of a two-year old granddaughter and a 6 year old grandson.

We adore them. But I can't imagine myself, in my mid-fifties, to raise a young child again. I'm tired when we have had them in the house for four hours, and we're glad our daughter or son-in-law comes to get them. The idea of having them in my house until I'm, say, 75, would terrify me. My arthritis already prevents me to lift them from the ground when they're still young.

That is from my point of view. I really wonder if I could make them happy feeling this way about children.

If you feel physically and emotionally able to care of them for the next twenty years - go ahead.

 

That is a major talking point and already been spoken to but I agree with you.

We are just talking and you know that you have to talk and talk and talk and talk when a woman gets something in her head that she would like ...

 

Graduation day might be a little lonely if the parents didn't make it to that date ...

 

Maybe there is some way you could help younger couples adopt...set up a fund for legal fees, something along those lines.

 

no unless you have health problems like Parkinson's disease....

50 is kind of pushing it.....

 

That's a really tough and highly personal question. I can say that for myself at age 49 I don't know if I would have the stamina and patience to raise a child 24/7. Grandkids are one thing because you can always hand them back to the parents.
There is also the law of diminishing returns as you get older. I know some have done it but I wouldn't. Now the question is what is best for you and your potential child.
Good luck with whatever your decision is.

 

We had a 3 year old visit us the other day. I couldn't wait for the little mother fucker to leave...

 

I think I agree with FreeThinker: most likely not fair.

Children are a miracle, yes. And there is nothing wrong with wanting them. But you say you're in your fifties. 51? 59? Somewhere in between? What if you adopt a boy? Will you be able to keep up with him when you're 65, and he's a teenager? What about the generation gap? Dealing with a teen girl, when you're two generations removed and an adopted parent, to boot? It's nearly impossible for thirty-something parents to keep up with a teen girl these days. Imagine doing that when you're pushing 70.

All that said, people do live healthier, longer, these days. If you and your mate are in top physical shape, then maybe you can handle it.

But otherwise, this thing that you want for yourselves is not fair to the baby.

 

50 something ?
53ish or 57ish
near 60 by the time you get and adoption > <
70+ they reach puberty
75 at their most rebellious
78 learning to drive
and fucking themselves silly
and ruling the roost , because their silly old parents are
"so out of touch"
and
"so twentieth century"
"you know , they still use phones , and money , and they can't work a warp drive"

"but its ok , they can hardly see and are deaf , so I can do as I like"

"no they can't puck me up , they can't drive in the dark , and anyway they're asleep by 9 o'clock"

"its ok , they have no idea what I do , so just bring your friends round any time , snort some mars dust and then gangbang me "

Roll on 2040 daddy



Sadly , my son and DiL will be in thier 60s by the time their kids approach 20 , and I can already see issues.
They're just so set in their ways , and in spite if every effort , and best intentions , I feel a bit sorry/sad for them (the children) , as dose my daughter , who reproduced at a more natural age ,
and now has 20 something's.

 

That is a fair thought but not my concern really as to what others do or want. I help charities plenty with funding and do have a foundation that helps displaced kids and abused mothers. Couples that want to adopt need to be self sufficient financially in order to be able to provide for a baby in their lives and are not charity cases ...

 

My thoughts exactly RK but as you probably know, once a woman gets something in her head you have to talk it through ad nausium lol. I would love to have an anklebiter around but agree this you on your post.

 

What the Hell. Go for it. By the time you've taught him how to wipe his ass, it'll be time for him to start wiping yours...

 

Its important to remember that people are living to be damn near 100 these days. So if you look at it along those lines then at fifty you still have half your life left. I think the more important question is are you mentally strong enough? Nothing in this world will ever test you like raising a child.

 

It is like you are reading my mind clarise and those are all valid points and echo my sentiment.

I can picture myself throwing a baseball or football for a few more years before the pepper comes off the throw and it would be hard on both me and the child in that regard to not be able to be all that a kid needs as far as physical participation.

Thanks for the input but I still have to exhaust all avenues of the bad points before my sweety will realize that a puppy is the best call lol.

 

True enough that people are living longer and I was robbed of getting to raise a child years ago when my daughter died and another was put up for adoption by my ex that did it behind my back after our break up and my sweety has it in her head that I have a void that needs to be filled in that regard, which I do not. (I am about to fill her void though lol)

I think I mentioned it somewhere before that they should have some sort of a rent a kid business for people that want to play mommy and daddy on weekends lol.

I did the whole "Big Brother" thing for years with displaced kids and as rewarding as that was, it was hard on the brain knowing that it was only for a couple hours at a time in a week and the one's that need a family the most are aging to a point where they are unadoptable ...

 

Hmmmmmmmmm,
i thought it took both parents signatures to put a kid up for adoption.

 

There is one thought that keeps coming to mind that makes me think there should be a test and resulting license to be be a parent and it has to be renewed periodically.

Anyway, I had a child with my ex in 1994 and three years later we split up and an ugly court battle started for custody. Long story short I was working in bumfuck NWT and had to charter a plane to make my court appearances which I did ... until the final one that I was snowed in for and missed it. The judge gave her sole custody with no visitation for me period, as I was not there to argue that decision and my lawyer was a fucking dummy to say it nicely.

Fast forward two years and I had left it alone as I only wanted the child to have some stability in his life and not be subjected to constant hate and fighting but I provided quite nicely for him through child support. I actually got an 18,000 dollar overpayment refund one year. So by the time my munchkin was five, without my knowledge the cunt put my son up for a closed adoption and I have been looking for him ever since ...

I put a huge chunk of money in a compound interest college fund years ago and kept adding to it. It hit over one million a few years ago and I went onto an adoption website as a last resort to try and locate my son and low and behold my ex saw the messages and contacted me almost fifteen tears later and had caught wind of the money and thought she was entitled to take it and pass it on to him even though she didn't even have access to the records or him for that matter. Money does strange shit to people at times and that crazy cunt is further proof of that.

The fund keeps growing and all I want is for him to claim it one day if he would like that.

 

There is a stipulation that you need to make an honest effort to contact the other parent and it is bullshit but still law. It states that if you run an ad in a major newspaper for three consecutive days with no result as far as trying locate the other parent you have fulfilled your end and are free to act as you deem necessary.

It is called "subservicing" ...