I want to know if I am (as I suspect) the only guy in the universe who's ever faked one.
It was during intercourse, and I was tired, and I basically knew I wasn't going to come,
and that she wouldn't want to stop until I did (she'd already come several times). It helped that she wasn't the most observant person...I made the appropriate movements and sounds...if she ever guessed, she didn't let on.

 

See above. You're not the only one

 

I think that's fair. I'm one of those people who 99% of the time cannot have an orgasm without clitoral stimulation, and it's really hard to find sex positions that are good enough on the clit for that, unless I am on top (and the bf loves to be dominant), and since he knows this, he get's it on being dominant and then if I haven't come he finishes me off with a bitchin handjob. without question. it's totally fair, and it all comes from discussing things like that with your partner. if you need to fake orgasms regularly, you need to talk to your partner about it so you can find another way to make it happen.

 

Yeah, sorry LostProphet, I guess I overlooked your post.

So she didn't realize? I worried at the time that she might see through me, since she had told be before she could sometimes feel the hot cum squirting out inside her, but that wasn't every time.

 

I think the key thing here is the question: if the guy isn't able to make you come during intercourse, can he still be considered a good lover? Meaning that,
if he's aware his partner didn't come, and gives her the manual or oral attention she needs, then does that rule out the "lousy fuck" label? If so, in order for him to have
the opportunity to satisfy her, he needs to know the truth about where she's at.
I'm saying this, because from what I understand statistically, a lot of men are not able to last long enough to give a woman an orgasm during intercourse, without an amount of foreplay that is also not statistically common. I don't want to say that most men are bad lovers, but I would say that...um...a sizable number could stand to improve.
Based on complaints I've heard from women over the years.

For me, there was definitely a learning curve, and when I was young I was prone to premature ejaculation. But self-control and simple aging seem to alleviate that.
For that reason though, my first wife would almost always tell me the truth about whether or not she came, so that I could enthusiastically go down on her until she did.
She tended to prefer clitoral orgasms anyway, so it was all good. She didn't feel a need to tell me sweet little lies when it came to those times she just really didn't care about coming - rather than faking, she would just tell me it wasn't important to her that night for whatever reason (on those rare occasions when that was the case).

My current wife would definitely be disappointed if she didn't come during orgasm (lol! I left that typo in because it was amusing... I meant while fucking); fortunately she almost always does. When she doesn't, she knows that I will not rest until she has.

I think there were only a couple times I know of that a lover faked an orgasm...unless she had the most subtle climaxes in the world. All I can say is, when the guys inside you, and isn't clueless, you're going to have to do more than make some sounds and wiggle, y' know? There are alot of tell-tale clues to look for, and when your cock is up to the hilt inside your partner, you feel her come...and it feels great. I guess a consummate actress could throw is some keggels...

 

Snoochies, your post made me sad.
At least your partner knows the truth, and has a positive attitude about it.

So, even though its off-topic for the thread, I have to ask...have you ever come from masturbation?
Or do you masturbate? I feel a little silly even asking that question of someone on this site...but you never know. If you're saying that you just have trouble coming with a partner, thats one thing, but if you have never, ever had an orgasm, thats another entirely. I'm going to share what I've read and heard recommended to others with a similar plight, by professionals.

First of all, if you don't masturbate, start. You need to first learn to listen to your own body's signals and learn what it takes to give yourself an orgasm before you can guide your partner to do the same thing. Basically, invest in a quality vibrator. Set aside a block of time in which you can relax, and have privacy. Take a hot bath, listen to music, whatever helps you relax. Unplug the phone. And just lay back and enjoy the sensations from your nerve endings (all over your body) without having a goal in mind. Nothing can block it more easily than trying too hard. Once you get to the point where you can come consistently that way, it will be easier to respond to other things.

Does your partner give you head? A sufficient amount of clitoral stimulation with a tongue usually leads pretty reliably to orgasm. But then I don't know the particulars of your situation, and I apologize if I'm assuming anything inaccurate - I really just want to help.

I realize it could be that there are physical or emotional blocks that are affecting you. I'm not saying thats the case, since I don't know, but it can affect such things. I once had a partner who had great difficulty reaching orgasm no matter what I did for her, and I was puzzled by it until she finally admitted to me that she had been abused as a child, and couldn't respond sexually unless the feelings were mixed with pain and humiliation. She told me the kinds of things she needed me to do for her, but it was far beyond my comfort zone. Unfortunately, she had no difficulty finding someone else who was willing to hurt her. (But yes, she is at least in therapy).

Please reply to this message, as I would like to know more about your "problem" and try to offer some suggestions.

 

that's a good point. however, it depends on other things as well. For me, just because I can't really come from vaginal intercourse only doesn't mean I don't enjoy it. The sex in itself is extremely good, and has, from time to time actually given me orgasm. Mostly though, it comes very very close, and its actually super super awesome, and in fact being so close to coming during sex often makes a post-sex orgasm that much better.

 

I don't masturbate. I gave up a LONG time ago. It's simply frustrating. I just end up hornier and ever MORE frustrated than when I began. And no...I've never-EVER had an orgasm. Yes, I have emotional blocks. Child molestation...just like your friend. We're working on that. It was only a few days ago that I managed to allow him to eat me out without having painful flashbacks. Sometimes I'd actually have to push him off me and leave just because I couldn't handle it. I always felt so bad just leaving him getting blue-balls but he's always been understanding.

He wants nothing more than to give me my first orgasm but we have a hell of a lot of fun together (with or without orgasms). So luckily I never feel like there's pressure to have one. I guess I mean I never feel like that's ALL he's aiming for. Or like that's the ONLY reason he's fucking me. He's looking forward to making it happen but it's obvious he's not obsessed with it. I think that would have really killed our sex life.

I probably have issues because I have too much testosterone. I had a hormone work-up and whoddathunkit...high testosterone. So maybe I just don't work properly. Anyhow, I guess the point is I used to masturbate (I didn't lose my virginity till I was 22) although not much. I just never got any enjoyment out of it so I just stopped.

I masturbate during foreplay but that's about it. Other than warming me up for a good fuck, there's really no point in it.

I know. My life is sad.....but it's true. I'm just glad I've got a guy who's willing to work on it with me and not add any pressure to an already crazy situation.

 

Oh ... I absolutely love this answer! haha

 

Yes, I have emotional blocks. Child molestation...just like your friend. We're working on that. It was only a few days ago that I managed to allow him to eat me out without having painful flashbacks. Sometimes I'd actually have to push him off me and leave just because I couldn't handle it.

I'm so sorry. But it sounds like he cares alot about you, and is patient, so I'd say theres a good chance that the two of you will work things out eventually. Are you getting any sort of counseling? It could help as well.

The former lover I mentioned was an extreme case, and certainly not the only woman I've known who was a victim of abuse as a child, or who was raped at some point in her adult life. She was the exception; for most it was a matter of learning to trust again, and being able to get past what I always called "old tapes playing". (I guess I should update that to CDs now...I'm showing my age!) Speaking as someone who's experienced PTSD, I can understand what flashbacks can be like.

I wish you the very best of luck. Take care.

 

We always used condoms (well, aside from ... twice) so she wouldn't have felt it.
She was suspicious, I think because it had never happened before (i.e. orgasm with no cum) but she was just worried about making me happy, and I was making love to a gorgeous girl, so of course I was fucking happy

 

With guys before my current boyfriend, faking orgasms was the way to go! ..You must imagine how I felt now that I actually have real orgasms!

 

if you don't mind me asking... what is the reason you faked them though???

 

He was just really, really bad at sex.. or had a very small penis. Either way, I just could not get the courage tell him he was doing badly.

 

oh ok, if it was me, i wouldn't tell him he was small or just plain crap in bed, but i would have told him what he could have done to get me off

but then everything makes sense in hindsight :excited:

 

Massageman

I've been a traveling massage therapist for many years-- So I can relate from experience.. Most of the ladies that seek me out do not fake orgasms. On the contrary, they seek to have more.. Shallow minded males who think one is enough have made me very popular in my area.
I use Hot Stones, Oiled hands, and a 90 minute massage to coax several [4-8 and more] orgasms from them.. A few go into a "continuous" orgasm, and pass out from the intensity.. Some want me to write a book so I could enlighten the male population.. but that would be cutting my own throat..Erotic Massage is not for the faint of heart.