Start the new job in a couple weeks. Gotta go do the drug test thingie tomorrow morning.

Til then, I'm treating it like stay-kation.

 

I had this random idea for a video game once. Kinda an apocalyptic theme.


God and Satan have both jusr randomly disappeared, and the throne is up for grabs in both heaven and hell. There are at least 5-6 people on both sides with their own armies, who want the spot. The goal is to win, and fight the other side in the final battle. On one side, you'd have cherubims with flaming swords and chariots, and on the other, demons and whatnot.


I also thought about throwing in Earth as a (relatively) neutral underdog 3rd side, with 5-6 people trying to overtake the world. I don't think a game like that's been made, but then again, I don't keep up, since I'm not an extremely active gamer.

 

When people say that they don't give a rat's ass, does this imply that they're secretly carrying around rat asses? Would there be any use for them?

Or the corollary.....

Would saying you DO give a rat's ass be a compliment? *throws rat asses at band on stage*

 

I can’t believe the Browns won today. RIP Jim Donovan.

 

What’s eating Gilbert Grape is a much better movie than I remembered.

 

"Some will die in hot pursuit and firey auto crashes
Some will die in hot pursuit while sifting through my ashes
Others will fall in love with life and drink it from a fountain
that is pouring like an avalanche, coming down the moutain."

 

Technology, old, new, bla bla bla.

Before we talk about new or old, a time line is essential. The center point of this time line is me, I am old, I come from a time where, "fuck you, get your own timeline" was perfectly acceptable. So just for those, not intimidated by my lack of over sensitivity towards the generation called "no common sense" ( quite a few really), that are still reading, congratulations, sense of humor found!
How wonderious a world we live in. You get to make up your own words, and where in this universe, and we have looked, can you put a roast in the crock pot, set up a nanny cam on the crock pot, so you can go and turn your cypher currency into cold hard cash, then, while you check the nanny cam on the way to offtrack betting.
Fucking wonderious I tell you.
The greatest invention man has made, although it can't be improved, some would like to see a wider application of it, I'll leave that be, is the OFF button, so vastly forgotten about in many ways.
"Holy fuck, technology has an off button? Who new?"
As the tach revolution moves along at increasing speed, the view of reality becomes that of a person looking out the window on a bullet train. Small glimpse into the outside world, gone, and forgotten in seconds. Once on this train is there getting off? Well common sense tells you " why worry, nothing you can do!"
Fucking wonderious I tell you......

 

I hate when people go to a lot of trouble to make some fake movie trailer and get me excited for no reason.

At LEAST label that shit correctly. "Concept" or "fake" or whatever. I'm not for censorship but part of me wants to get that shit taken down to spite them.

 

The original patent for the fire hydrant was lost in a fire

 

I’m thinking about being drugged, and I’m lying face down ass up with my panties down and my bra and shirt hiked up, and people are laughing and taking turns on me, taking pics and videos to pass around later….. <3

 

This salsa needs to be hotter, even for medium

 

I wonder if my fish see me as a huge Godzilla-like monster when I approach their tank

 

Do men always shake their penis after Urinating

 

I don’t know why I bother coming here if I’m not actually willing to check my notifications.

 

I’ve talked to many people who notify me

 

You can tell with in a few minutes if they are assholes

 

If Jesus were breaking bread during the last supper, then was there a bread repairman acting as a demonic counter force also in place? You know, in the spirit of God/Satan.

 

I don’t want to file my fingernails for fear that if chipmunks or other such likeable creatures come into my home that they would be subject to lung micropuntures like one sees in asbestos. I can’t imagine the guilt I would feel seeing a chippy on a ventilator solely because of my fingernail dust. I don’t know if people use files for their toenails as well but if you do, please consider the even greater karmic cost of even more gross human distal appendage dust. And don’t make the raccoons angry cause I know from a reliable source that they are watching.

 

What do you suppose happens when an unstoppable force and an immovable object make a baby?

A god baby!?!

 

I texted my husband and told him I sneezed my head off so don’t be surprised when he gets home and I don’t have a head.

He responded with a laughing emoji. Should I be worried?