granted, the finger gets lost in translation.


I wish Zygotes ate pancakes

 

granted but they are blueberry



I wish I had a whispering eye

 

Granted. Your eye whispers. Poke me out, poke me out.

I wish there weren't so many sadists on the police force.

 

granted, but all the sadists become doctors/dentists instead.

I wish I had $100,000.

 

Granted, but it's Monopoly money!


I wish people would notice my count like they do the favored few when they hit a milestone.

 

hehehe. damn. ya got me. but you forgot your new wish!

 

orrrr, i just couldn't see it the first time.

Granted - I notice that you're almost at 6,000 posts and congratulate you. BUT post 6,000 gives you a virus and your computer is fried.

I wish I could move into my house this weekend instead of waiting a month for closing.

 

Granted, you now have to move to your house today, but because it's so soon, you didn't have time to get anything packed and it is all left behind. Even your... COMPUTER!

I wish I was a model.

 

Granted!! You are now a model on 'how not to do it'!! Do what? I hear you ask - ANYTHING is the reply!!

I wish I grew watermelons!!

 

Granted, but they are obviously fake and even a little on the novelty side.


I wish supper was at 4:30.

 

Granted, you're in bed (alone) at 4.45

I wish I had a pound for every time I gurn at people - I'd be a nobbing billionaire by now!!

 

Granted, you just gurnt 300 pounds and you've gurtten really really fat.

I wish I was a super hero.

 

Granted- you now have the power to wear tights and look gay.

I wish I was more appealing to women.

 

Granted!! You are now a 24 carat diamond ring *BLING*

I wish I had made that chocolate trifle earlier

 

Granted, but you already ate it, so now it's already being digested and turning into fat and poo and it's doing you no good where it is.

I wish I could go down the hill really fast.

 

granted, you stumble and fall...therefor you roll down the hill very fast

I wish I knew the reason why

 

Granted- you now know why, but the truth leaves a nasty taste in your mouth and you are also pregnant for some reason.

I wish I could finish what I start.

 

Granted, but you finished what someone else started.

I wish I had a nice 15 year Rum right now.

 

granted, but the genie misreads it, and gives you a 15 year old rim, which rusts and falls off your car. you then go careening off a cliff, and your body parts are split across the four winds.

i wish i didnt have a $804 traffic ticket.

 

granted, but u miss read the traffic ticket and its for $8,004

I wish I had a better payin job with sexual favors:rose:


LATER DAYS!!!